For Those Of You In A LTR...

  • NyRuinz

    Posts: 887

    Dec 04, 2009 10:28 AM GMT
    When you first met your current boyfriend did you know that you would end up dating him long term, or did you have no clue that you and him would eventually get together? I often hear people say that you will end up with someone that you least expect, do any of you find that to be true from your experiences?
  • skeeno

    Posts: 6

    Dec 04, 2009 10:40 AM GMT
    NyRuinz saidWhen you first met your current boyfriend did you know that you would end up dating him long term, or did you have no clue that you and him would eventually get together? I often hear people say that you will end up with someone that you least expect, do any of you find that to be true from your experiences?



    I'm no sure....but I believe that there is some kind of chemical things between the nature partners.....: )
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 04, 2009 11:47 AM GMT
    There's no rule, but in our case, yes.

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    Dec 04, 2009 12:37 PM GMT
    We met in a bar in the usual cheesy way. So when he turned out to be LTR material it came as a very pleasant surprise!
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    Dec 04, 2009 1:02 PM GMT
    meninlove saidThere's no rule, but in our case, yes.

    Agree, no rule, but also the case with me, 3 times a yes: my late partner, and a BF of 2 years, plus my current partner. Each time met him to see how it would go, and each time it went well. I wouldn't call it love at first sight, but definitely an early attraction was there.

    On the other hand, also dumped guys early, about whom I initially had strong attractions and great hopes, and wanted to have an LTR with them. This is why I encourage single gays to meet many guys (and not in a slutty way) and to date them, so they can take "test drives" and build up an experience base to help them make a good LTR choice when the right guy comes along.

    And also to increase the chances that the right man WILL come along. As I tell guys, it's doubtful he'll come knocking on your door on his own, when all you do is stay at home and live in your own little world.

    From "Cabaret":

    What good is sitting alone in your room?
    Come hear the music play.
    Life is a Cabaret, old chum,
    Come to the Cabaret.

    Put down the knitting,
    The book and the broom.
    Time for a holiday.
    Life is Cabaret, old chum,
    Come to the Cabaret.

    Come taste the wine,
    Come hear the band.
    Come blow your horn,
    Start celebrating;
    Right this way,
    Your table's waiting

    And etc...
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    Dec 04, 2009 1:12 PM GMT
    lol, we met in the cheezy bar fashion as well.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Dec 04, 2009 1:18 PM GMT
    I had absolutely no idea. He was someone I had chatted with online in a "friend" sense and I was pretty clueless (and hadn't even acknowleged I was gay). I think it was after the second date and my 4 hour "attack" on
    my now bf that I got clued in... LOL.

    However we did almost break up after I had seen him about 2.5 months.
    He said he was developing major feelings and he was concerned I didn't return them because of my lack of gay experience and the like.
    We didn't break up.
  • ATLANTIS7

    Posts: 1213

    Dec 04, 2009 1:24 PM GMT
    I knew as soon as l saw him live on web cam l was in Love!

    we talked a lot begore at least a month or so and he was in the internet cafe when we saw each other on web cam and he said he felt the same!

    Maybe it was meant to be like most things in life?

    There is a big age gap but so what he does not like young and never has had a relationship ever before of course l have had my fill!


  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 04, 2009 1:34 PM GMT
    I never would have guessed that I would find myself in a relationship with someone who lived clear across the country. After meeting each other right here in Forums though, here we are. Keep your options open because you might just be in for the happiest surprise of your life!
  • NyRuinz

    Posts: 887

    Dec 04, 2009 2:45 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidI had absolutely no idea. He was someone I had chatted with online in a "friend" sense and I was pretty clueless (and hadn't even acknowleged I was gay). I think it was after the second date and my 4 hour "attack" on
    my now bf
    that I got clued in... LOL.

    However we did almost break up after I had seen him about 2.5 months.
    He said he was developing major feelings and he was concerned I didn't return them because of my lack of gay experience and the like.
    We didn't break up.



    You guys went at it for 4 hours icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 04, 2009 2:47 PM GMT
    Ours was a hookup. Turned out to be a 6-year hookup!

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    Dec 04, 2009 2:53 PM GMT
    I didn't think so when I'd first met him--I'd asked him out, but he was in a relationship. We saw each other at the gym from time to time over the course of a couple of years, and one night we ran into each other at the local bar--by then, he and I were both single. And I knew shortly after we started seeing other other that we'd be together for awhile.
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    Dec 04, 2009 2:58 PM GMT
    I just got out of a five year long relationship. On our first date, I knew we would be together a long time and for guys in our early 20s we were.
  • drypin

    Posts: 1798

    Dec 04, 2009 3:49 PM GMT
    He was a penpal - yes, as in pen and paper. He seemed nice and safe, but not romantic material. We got together while I was bicycling across Europe. I saw him walking toward me on the train platform and thought, holy f* is he hot. It was the eyes. And the smile. and he was a centimeter taller. But at the time I didn't think, "I'm going to dump my bf for this guy 4,000 miles away."
  • DuggerPDX

    Posts: 386

    Dec 04, 2009 3:52 PM GMT
    We have been together 15 years. When we first met we were at a party and we were leaving at the same time, we both were driving the exact same Jeep Cherokee, so this gave me a reason to start a conversation. Knew that something had sparked at that moment. It took only a couple more dates before we were hooked!

    -Doug
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    Dec 04, 2009 4:00 PM GMT
    Every September flightjock and I look at eachother and say: 'Wow. You're still here?' icon_biggrin.gif
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    Dec 04, 2009 6:09 PM GMT
    When I met my Bf for the first time, I fell in love (the kind where you are totally speechless and you both are staring at each other, mindless of what is happening around you). Once away from him, did not know if it would continue because I am old -fashioned. But here we are, celebrating 5 years on 1/1/2010.

    BTW: not so old-fashioned anymore, at least in some areas...icon_wink.gif
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    Dec 04, 2009 6:16 PM GMT
    My partner claims it was love at first sight. I'm not sure I believe in that, but there was definitely something there that made me know he would be around for a while.
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    Dec 04, 2009 6:20 PM GMT
    Not a clue. Met him at a wedding. Was with someone else. Started dating him over a year later after I seduced him in a club.
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    Dec 04, 2009 6:26 PM GMT
    jprichva said
    Jockbod48 saidI never would have guessed that I would find myself in a relationship with someone who lived clear across the country. After meeting each other right here in Forums though, here we are. Keep your options open because you might just be in for the happiest surprise of your life!

    Not likely. Good for the two of you, though. (Hugs to each)


    Ah dude you let that little sex kitten out one more time you'll be snapped up like a snap dragon in heat. There are so many furries around here just waiting so never say never. I think you have a song for that don't you! icon_cool.gif
  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Dec 04, 2009 6:53 PM GMT
    it's been 20 months now with him. for me that's a LTR.

    we met online (gay.com no less!), chatted online several times, finally agreed to meet at a neighborhood gay friendly bar.

    we met up, got a lil' bit drunk together, wound up at my house. after a night of awesome orgasms we both parted ways. i assumed i'd never see/hear from him again.

    a week later he called me, we repeated the above.

    a month later, we both agreed that neither one of us wanted a bf, would still see other guys, but both of us were fine with being fuckbuddies.

    a few months later i lost any urge to be with anyone else but him.

    as did he.


    whowuddathunkit?
  • Laurence

    Posts: 942

    Dec 04, 2009 7:00 PM GMT
    Met my husband over the internet, on a dating (not hook-up) site.

    We emailed for a month, talked on the phone for a week and then met for a date.

    I din't know if he was the one (or one of the ones) for quite some time. But suddenly after 18 months we were living together and then we had a commitment ceremony (non religious, we're both heathens) and have been together 7 years.

    Like everyone says here, there's no one way of doing things, sometimes it's instant and sometimes it grows into something.

    Personally, I really enjoyed being a single Gay man and now I really enjoy being in a loving relationship.

    Lozx
  • twentyfourhou...

    Posts: 243

    Dec 04, 2009 7:02 PM GMT
    "I often hear people say that you will end up with someone that you least expect, do any of you find that to be true from your experiences"?
    In my case, yes. In several ways i had never dated someone like him and didn't think i ever would. Two 1/2 years later and going strong - i am blessed. I know there are no guarantees in life but if i have a say - he is all the man i need for the rest of my life.
  • menhot4u

    Posts: 8

    Dec 04, 2009 7:06 PM GMT
    We meet on the job 20 years ago!