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    Dec 11, 2009 10:03 PM GMT
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  • mcwclewis

    Posts: 1701

    Dec 11, 2009 11:23 PM GMT
    I know! AHHHH!


    They always say "Oh he's adorable." or "Oh he's such a sweetie!"

    Then you meet him and he's a nutjob.
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    Dec 11, 2009 11:25 PM GMT
    lol, you guys, straight people do this with each other all the time. It's called matchmaking.....icon_wink.gif

  • mcwclewis

    Posts: 1701

    Dec 11, 2009 11:40 PM GMT
    Well yes, but they're not like


    "Oh you're straight! I HAVE A STRAIGHT FRIEND! You guys would be great together!"


    It's the assumption that all gay men are compatible with all gay men that bothers me.

    It's almost as bad as "Oh you're gay? That's awesome! I need a friend to go shopping with!"
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    Dec 12, 2009 1:27 AM GMT
    I think the logic for the matchmaker goes like this: I'm friends with x and I'm friends with y, so x and y should be able to be friends or more as well.

    Instead of making a date with x, you should ask the matchmaker that the 3 of you hang out together, it's probably less awkward than a full on date.
  • JDean

    Posts: 166

    Dec 12, 2009 1:32 AM GMT
    I'm so jealous! All of my friends give me this "oh, i have a gay cousin/uncle/friend/etc but you wouldn't like him." I think my friends think they know me to well. i blame my friends for me having no gay friends.
  • jgymnast733

    Posts: 1783

    Dec 12, 2009 2:17 AM GMT
    LMAO,
    Your so right, i'm sick of them matching me up with Queen Zelda, what are we supposed to do in bed?? Bump handbags..icon_eek.gif
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Dec 12, 2009 5:20 AM GMT
    mcwclewis saidWell yes, but they're not like


    "Oh you're straight! I HAVE A STRAIGHT FRIEND! You guys would be great together!"


    It's the assumption that all gay men are compatible with all gay men that bothers me.

    It's almost as bad as "Oh you're gay? That's awesome! I need a friend to go shopping with!"


    Exactly.

    A girl at a party a few weekends ago said to me, "Oh my god having a gay best friend is so great. Watching Will and Grace made me want to have one, and now I have, like, four. I mean, it might be a little awkward for you...."

    Then I say, "I'm gay."

    And she replies, "Oh, hahaha, oh wow, uh, oh, well I have a bunch of friends who love to go out back home you should come to London and hang out with us!"

    icon_rolleyes.gifYeah right, hun....
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    Dec 12, 2009 5:31 AM GMT
    At least they were looking out for you. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2009 5:32 AM GMT
    mcwclewis saidOh you're gay? That's awesome! I need a friend to go shopping with!"


    This always makes me feel like a bad gay. I'm not a fan of shopping, gossiping, or anything else a "gay" man is.
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    Dec 12, 2009 5:37 AM GMT
    Wow - I wish someone would do that for me. I guess if all of them are nuts it's kind of insulting, but I'm sort of nuts too, so maybe it would be ok icon_smile.gif
  • rdberg1957

    Posts: 662

    Dec 12, 2009 7:00 AM GMT
    I don't assume that every gay man wants to be coupled--I've known many who are satisfied with being single, at least at the time I talked with them. But I believe many more are single for much longer than desired. I agree with Soulasphyxi "at least they were looking out for you." I wish gay men would do that for each other more. I believe lesbians (being women) help each other partner more than do gay men (being more competitive). Heterosexual families which are relatively functional help their children to partner by being supportive of coupling (once they believe a match is not made in hell). Gay men could do a better job of helping each other than could our straight friends, but at least our straight friends are trying. Some couples do meet through mutual friends, but I'd like to see that become more common. I like the strategy of hanging out together more than the pressure of a blind date. Seems reasonable.
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    Dec 12, 2009 7:13 AM GMT
    OMFG!!! I know what you mean.

    It's like every other day one of my friends tell me " Kevin I found the perfect guy for you, I Think you two would look so cute together."


    I DON'T WANT A BOYFRIEND!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2009 7:23 AM GMT
    Straight people don't realize that the gay community can be pretty small. And in Cape Town it is reeeeaaaallly small.

    This is made smaller by Facebook and sites like Real Jock.

    When straight friends suggest you meet their gay friend cos he would be so awesome for you the Cape Town reply is usually:

    "Uhm... I've already been there."

    or

    "I know him. He's a douche nozzle. Forget it! Why do you hate me so much?!"



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2009 7:25 AM GMT
    OK, true confession time...we're always on the lookout here for guys we think we could introduce to each other.

    Yeah, we know, hopeless romantics...just really love seeing two guys hit it off with each other. Reminds us of us, and brings back a helluva a lot of sweet memories.

    -Dougicon_redface.gif n Bill icon_redface.gif

  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Dec 12, 2009 7:27 AM GMT
    A woman's #1 priority in life is to find a mate, so they automatically think that gay men are that way, too.
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    Dec 12, 2009 8:13 AM GMT
    jgymnast733 saidLMAO,
    Your so right, i'm sick of them matching me up with Queen Zelda, what are we supposed to do in bed?? Bump handbags..icon_eek.gif


    SCORE!!!!

    I like it, and think that it is awesome when people want to hook you up. However, I have to agree that it is usually with Queen Zelda.
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    Dec 12, 2009 8:18 AM GMT
    I couldn't agree more. Geez. I mean here's the thing - everyone who is single, gay or straight, is annoyed by some of the curve balls they get thrown by friends setting up dates. Yes, it can be awkward.

    But you're taking for granted the fact that they're treating you like a normal person who they want to be happy. Maybe you need to be more honest with them about who you find attractive/not certifiable. But your friends are your best vetting system, and you're way more likely to find a really awesome guy through friends than by going to some random bar. Jus' sayin'.

    Doug and Bill deserve medals for that sort of thing as far as I'm concerned.

    meninlove said OK, true confession time...we're always on the lookout here for guys we think we could introduce to each other.

    Yeah, we know, hopeless romantics...just really love seeing two guys hit it off with each other. Reminds us of us, and brings back a helluva a lot of sweet memories.

    -Dougicon_redface.gif n Bill icon_redface.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2009 8:19 AM GMT
    Ive told all the straight girls the golden rule - just coz you know two gay guys, doesn't mean they go together. So they don't set me up with anyone now haha
  • captproton

    Posts: 316

    Dec 12, 2009 8:45 AM GMT
    Gay or straight, my friends know I don't like fix-ups. They never have worked. Never.
  • cbrock

    Posts: 212

    Dec 12, 2009 9:44 AM GMT
    I like to change the context and turn it around on them. If your friend is tall, try and hook them up with another tall person. If they're blond, hook em up with blond, etc... It usually helps them become aware. Usually they don't mean anything by it, they're just trying to give you the hook up, they just kinda forget social etiquette.
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    Dec 12, 2009 9:52 AM GMT
    It's also funny to me that they think just because we're gay we must all know each other. One person said this to me, "Oh - I have a gay friend out there in California - I wonder if you might know him?" Right - we all know each other & see each other at "the meetings."icon_cool.gif
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    Dec 12, 2009 9:57 AM GMT
    yes, truly frustrating. although, that is always better than when out and there is ONE other gay person at a bar/event and they try to force you to go talk to him or push you in his direction and eagerly encourage you to "go for it," just because that person is gay.

    my response is usually that i will grab my girl friend, point to some guy in the bar, and say, "see that fat, ugly guy over there... he's straight... go for it gurl!"

    and then ... they stop.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 12, 2009 10:43 AM GMT
    My straight roomate from a year ago says to me, "such and such swallowed the whole dildo! he's not bad looking! you should hook up with him! He's gay, dude! you want his number?!"

    They were playing some game seeing who could deepthroath a huge dildo the best- yes, even my straight roomate. I was intrigued for a split second. I like sex but damn it's not a match made in heaven just because the guy can...well. You know what I'm saying.
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    Dec 12, 2009 11:02 AM GMT
    joeyveras saidMy straight roomate from a year ago says to me, "such and such swallowed the whole dildo! he's not bad looking! you should hook up with him! He's gay, dude! you want his number?!"

    They were playing some game seeing who could deepthroath a huge dildo the best- yes, even my straight roomate. I was intrigued for a split second. I like sex but damn it's not a match made in heaven just because the guy can...well. You know what I'm saying.


    Send me his number? icon_rolleyes.gif

    people normal try and set me up with their straight friends.

    I think I need a sign "I donĀ“t do girls". icon_eek.gif