Falling for Someone??!!

  • powerman3

    Posts: 7

    Dec 21, 2009 5:34 AM GMT
    I have been reading some forums and I think it would be a good idea for people to think about this...

    When using online sites, like realjock but not only RJ, what happens if you fall for someone before you actually meet them? Not saying that I have but I have met some people who have been wondering this as well...

    What do you think if someone, one of your friends on here, fell for you. and I am not talking about dumb puppy love, like omg he is so hot i wanna be with them...I mean actually head over heels in love? Thinking about them daily, wondering what they are up to, and waiting for them to email you.

    I have met some people on here that I have developed feelings for, most have become amazing friends but others that I wonder if something could ever happen.

    Just wondering if I am crazy to think that someone could fall for someone else before actually meeting them...and if it is crazy....**GULP**
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:41 AM GMT


    icon_redface.gif
  • powerman3

    Posts: 7

    Dec 21, 2009 5:43 AM GMT
    perfect response lol thank u
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:50 AM GMT
    Oh- serious time.


    I did that once.

    I learned my lesson. icon_cry.gificon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 3:50 PM GMT
    Expectations and Response. Does your groin hurt? Can not get him out of your mind? Oh yes wait for an email, its been 3 days? See them clearly in your mind? Can feel, smell, touch him. Love him and not just sex?
    Oh it hurts soooo good. It puts a big smile on your face. Certain songs are all about him?

    I remind myself this: He has a life, responsiblities, job before I came into it. I have a life too. He also waits for my emails. We respect each other. He gives me my space and I give him his. When we do connect it is awlsome, fantastic.

    I don't place my expectations on him and he does not do that to me. We are in a "getting to know and understand you" phase. Patience will see me through. If it does not work out in the long run, the journey is spectacular.
    Enjoy it and go on with your life. I do not plan on losing who I am and I expect the same for him. Go for it.

    I suspect we are not alone.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:36 PM GMT
    I've a bit of a crush on a guy in Australia. He's my "little green thumb" - a gardener by trade who contacted me on another site. We skype, flirt, text and vid/chat from time to time. But we're also realistic - and the same age. Both go on dates, etc. HOWEVER, I am dying to meet him. icon_smile.gif I'm sure it will happen. It's just a matter of when.

    If I get to Australia and I'm single, I'll have the BEST tour guide w/benefits imaginable. He's super sexy and ultra-nerdy fun. icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:45 PM GMT
    powerman3 saidI have been reading some forums and I think it would be a good idea for people to think about this...

    When using online sites, like realjock but not only RJ, what happens if you fall for someone before you actually meet them? Not saying that I have but I have met some people who have been wondering this as well...

    What do you think if someone, one of your friends on here, fell for you. and I am not talking about dumb puppy love, like omg he is so hot i wanna be with them...I mean actually head over heels in love? Thinking about them daily, wondering what they are up to, and waiting for them to email you.

    I have met some people on here that I have developed feelings for, most have become amazing friends but others that I wonder if something could ever happen.

    Just wondering if I am crazy to think that someone could fall for someone else before actually meeting them...and if it is crazy....**GULP**


    Potentially a problem
    Potentially can work
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:46 PM GMT
    powerman3 said
    When using online sites, like realjock but not only RJ, what happens if you fall for someone before you actually meet them?


    I wouldn't let it happen. My first requirement for guys I date is that they be available, which includes geographically available. We are all spread across a wide geographic area. I am not saying meeting online can't work, but my preference is direct contact in the real world. There's so many more cues one can read (body language, etc).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:48 PM GMT
    Well..it could be more that, in that circumstance, you (or anyone feeling that way) is in love with an internal image of the the guy that may not match up to the reality of him. I think it's natural, though.

    I met my last boyfriend via a website. We talked on the phone for a month before I finally relented and went on a date with him (I was very opposed to it at first). We clicked amazingly, but not enough for him to stand by me when I was to sea. So even when you spend time with someone face-to-face, you don't "know" them so well. It takes time, interaction, and time to be together.

    If you stay realistic, things progress more sensibly. But if you build up an image of someone internally, even if you don't realize you're doing it, chances are you'll be disappointed when you actually meet each other.

    Still, nothing ventured, nothing gained.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 5:52 PM GMT
    In my experience, developing feelings before meeting someone in person usually leads to trouble. But, sometimes, it seems feelings have a mind of their own.

    I agree with jimbob in that the guy "in person" may not match up to the image of him you've created in your mind.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 6:09 PM GMT
    I think this happens mostly when someone is newly out and starting to date. I let this happen to me but I have learned. We generally see all the good qualities in someone from their profile and our fantasy of what life could be like with that person takes over. It is kind of crazy actually. If you find this is happening to you, snap out of it. think rationally and tell yourself you should meet this person before you start to feel this way. but then again, if you have been talking with this person over a longer period of time, then it would be more understandable. but, online chemistry is different than in person chemistry... the way people flow and connect through conversation will most likely be different.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Dec 21, 2009 6:11 PM GMT
    Give it a shot!