"You should always hang out with friends that are as hot or hotter than you"

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2009 5:36 PM GMT
    I heard somenoe say this once and got real pissed off at it. Do you think that for the most part this is what most gays think about when choosing friends, honestly....
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    Dec 29, 2009 5:41 PM GMT
    AussieBoy55 saidI heard somenoe say this once and got real pissed off at it. Do you think that for the most part this is what most gays think about when choosing friends, honestly....



    1) I don't understand the logic behind it. Is it to make you look less hot? Or to make you look hot because only hot people hang around with hot people?

    2) It's complete...
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    Dec 29, 2009 5:47 PM GMT
    ...i have no friends.....


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  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Dec 29, 2009 5:49 PM GMT
    HELL NO!

    (mostly because there is no one hotter than I )

    p.s. ask for details icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2009 5:50 PM GMT
    Hehe - Whoever said that to you is beyond shallow.

    He/She might think it's gospel, but it comes off as a line from a movie, said by the character, everyone loves to hate. LOL!
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    Dec 29, 2009 5:53 PM GMT

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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2009 5:56 PM GMT
    That's just kinda lame thinking. I used to feel like I was on the receiving end of that type of flawed logic (being the much less hot option). Being mature enough now to know better than to even give such folks the time of day, I have more time to stress out over other more important things. icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:03 PM GMT
    I think it's easy to flame the post at first, but when you think about it... it does really happen.
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    Are people attracted to people who look like them?
    Yes, says Linda Roberts, a professor of human development and family studies at UW-Madison.

    Roberts, who studies couples, says evidence supports this folk wisdom. People are generally attracted to those of similar social class, age and ethnicity. To illustrate the point in her class on couple relationships, she chooses someone in a long-term relationship and pretends to guess the characteristics of the mate, basing those guesses on the student’s own characteristics.

    “I can get it right to some degree of certainty,” she says. “It’s not perfect, but birds of a feather do flock together, when it comes to the mating game.”

    The like-attracts-like thesis gets support from some subtle mating choices, Roberts adds.

    “People choose mates who have the same ear-lobe length or nose width. It seems to be unconscious, but we do have a propensity to choose people who look similar to ourselves.”

    Men and women tend to choose partners having the same general level of attractiveness, Roberts adds. Statistically, stunners choose stunners, and middling people tend to choose from the center of the spectrum. “Obviously there are a lot of exceptions, but this is the tendency,” she says.

    Finally, researchers have “proven” another bit of folk wisdom: people do look like their dogs. Or at least, experimental subjects matched dogs with their owners, based solely on portraits, better than chance would predict. Arf!
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:03 PM GMT
    It's rare to see that one ugly or fat guy w/ his hot counter part or that one hot guy with a group of trolls. Everyone wants to have some association w/ beauty so some of that statement might be true. How it's sought out and the motive behind it is a different story. People usually have or choose friends of common intrest. Well groomed men have that common familiarity.
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Dec 29, 2009 6:03 PM GMT
    Yeah, I hang out with whomever I want, regardless of looks. But I understand the OPs concern. I have had "hot" friends ask me about my other friends like "You're hanging out with HIM?". Some gay friends have already told me that they won't go with me somewhere if I bring a certain friend that is mostly flaming. Yes, they have told me in no uncertain terms that because he is flaming they are not comfortable around him. They also admit that it is an issue they are trying to deal with and get over.

    There is one benefit though to hanging out with hot friends and going to the bars. At that point I completely become Cellophane Man and get ignored while all the drunks and wasteds go after my friend....I love it! However, I do have to hear his bitching about it all during the ride home.
  • RSportsguy

    Posts: 1925

    Dec 29, 2009 6:06 PM GMT
    I just hang out with people who I want to hang out with because they are nice people! I thought that was the whole concept of hanging out!
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:20 PM GMT
    Bigsmiles saidAre people attracted to people who look like them?
    Yes, says Linda Roberts, a professor of human development and family studies at UW-Madison.
    This study seemed to lean heavily towards attraction as it correlates to love relationships.
    Of course we are all attracted to to good looking people but that isn't necessarily indicative of who we hang out with. Choosing one's friends based on their physical aesthetic is as base as choosing a pair of jeans because of the color.
    It doesn't take into account the myriad of other variables that come into account, on different levels, for different people.
    To have friends that are only good looking is about as base as wearing shirts that are only blue, regardless of fit, fabric, style, designer, climate, etc.
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:32 PM GMT
    AussieBoy55 saidI heard somenoe say this once and got real pissed off at it. Do you think that for the most part this is what most gays think about when choosing friends, honestly....


    Whoever said this line - is just a superficial queen who is probably not hot himself. Hang out with whoever you want - Does friendship define colors and appearances? NO.
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:34 PM GMT
    Have you never noticed that when you go to big gay nightclubs or circuit parties all the muscle marys hang out together?

    So, I think this definitely has an element of truth to it.
  • mcwclewis

    Posts: 1701

    Dec 29, 2009 6:38 PM GMT
    redheadguy saidHave you never noticed that when you go to big gay nightclubs or circuit parties all the muscle marys hang out together?

    So, I think this definitely has an element of truth to it.


    True but it might just be that they hang out because of commong interests.


    Maybe I'm giving them too much credit.
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:38 PM GMT
    AussieBoy55 saidI heard somenoe say this once and got real pissed off at it. Do you think that for the most part this is what most gays think about when choosing friends, honestly....

    Yes, I think this way of thinking is pretty common in the gay world (and straight world). Guys tend to seek out and associate with their own kind.. whether it's by attractiveness or body type or ethnicity or whatever. Not saying that every gay guy feels that way, but I just see it happen a lot, both online and in the real world.

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    Dec 29, 2009 6:38 PM GMT
    Maybe subconsciously, but I wouldn't say it holds true for everyone.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2009 6:42 PM GMT
    The subject is this: "You should always hang out with friends that are as hot or hotter than you"

    That is not the same as "People gravitate to those with similar interests."

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    Dec 29, 2009 6:43 PM GMT
    I always thought it was the opposite. You were supposed to hang with ugly people, so you would always look good. ...fat people, so you would always look slender. ...stupid people, so you would always look smart. ...you get the idea.

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    Dec 29, 2009 6:48 PM GMT



    Chaaxwvn said...i have no friends.....


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    Hey what about me?
  • MSUBioNerd

    Posts: 1813

    Dec 29, 2009 6:49 PM GMT
    Hanging out solely with people who are either as or more attractive than you and ignoring their other qualities seems to be a great way to ensure that you end up feeling either unattractive (by being the ugliest person there), lonely (by having very few friends), or both. It strikes me as rather moronic.
  • JP85257

    Posts: 3284

    Dec 29, 2009 6:50 PM GMT
    I dont have any ugly friends. ;)
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Dec 29, 2009 6:57 PM GMT
    mcwclewis said
    redheadguy saidHave you never noticed that when you go to big gay nightclubs or circuit parties all the muscle marys hang out together?

    So, I think this definitely has an element of truth to it.


    True but it might just be that they hang out because of commong interests.


    Maybe I'm giving them too much credit.


    Na, I think you are right, just like overtanned twinks hang together, etc. Also, this is a thread about good looking....just because someone has muscle doesn't mean they are hot at a non-specific genre gay bar.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2009 7:03 PM GMT
    no
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    Dec 29, 2009 7:10 PM GMT
    I have surely seen this happening and not just for gay guys. In a club you will always see good looking girls or guys in a separate group than the average. This not 100% applicable but 70% is a very good measure.