Should I Go For It?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 09, 2010 5:27 PM GMT
    So I need to start out by saying that I am 20, and I've had maybe 2 relationships since coming out 5 years ago, with only 1 being "significant" (as significant as it can be when you're 15 years old). I am pretty old, aside from my actual age, so I really have been trying to date older guys. Any who, I literally ran into this guy on New Year's Eve, and spent the entire weekend with him. He is about to be 33, which is not a problem at all. He seems like a really great guy, and I really enjoy his company. The only downfall, he lives in Baton Rouge, LA - I live in Houston, TX. We haven't really discussed where we stand relationship wise, and I won't bring it up for awhile seein as we just really met, but he is already making plans to come down next weekend and I'm going out the following.

    If this does develop into something that I can see lasting, I don't know if I want to try this whole long distance thing. It's been a long while since I had any sort of emotional relationship. Thoughts?
  • Timbales

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    Jan 09, 2010 7:57 PM GMT
    IMO, it will depend on how invested you both are in where you live and how important it would be to each of you live closer to each other if the relationship develops.

    For some people, a long distance relationship with frequent visits will work, for others it won't.
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    Jan 09, 2010 8:08 PM GMT
    One of you is going to have to move if this does turn into something. I vote for the younger one (sorry icon_smile.gif )

    I've been there. Travelled 6000 miles for a semi-blind date with a guy I'd been communicating with for 6 months. Ended up being my most significant relationship to date and I was the one that moved. Sometimes you just have to follow your heart. It beats listening to "logic" and wondering "what could have happened" for years to come.
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    Jan 09, 2010 8:29 PM GMT
    It's sure easy to get caught up in the rush with someone new. Relax and see where it goes. Worry about moving later-- much later.
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    Jan 09, 2010 8:35 PM GMT
    Go for it! I wish I lived in Houston icon_smile.gif
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    Jan 09, 2010 9:03 PM GMT
    I'm no relationship expert, especially since I've never been in a serious one, but I've been around enough to know about long distance relationships.

    Doesn't the long distance work only if you two already have built a solid foundation to stand on when things get "wobbly"? I've known a few couples who have been dating for years before they were separated (distance-wise), and they ended up doing fine, even though they don't see each other for longer than half of the year at times. I've also seen couples who thought they had something going on during the short time (as in less than a year, few months perhaps) they were together, but fell apart completely as soon as they were far away from each other for a long time.

    I think if you guys are planning on having a monogamous, long-distance relationship, that is something definitely worthy of a long discussion taking all possibilitesinto consideration. If you guys are willing to just leave it as an open-relationship, then perhaps things might work out a little easier, because then you guys can still meet other people instead of waiting for the latter to come for a visit all the time.

    Well, good luck and I hope you found this helpful XP

    Steven
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    Jan 09, 2010 11:52 PM GMT
    jprichva saidThoughts? Stop obsessing. See how your weekend visits go. Obsess later.


    Exactly. You're young. You have time to figure it out. Stop obsessing and just enjoy it for what it is. Let the relationship grow accordingly. It's not a life and death issue here. Too many guys make it into that. Just have enjoy it for what it is. If it's meant to be it will work itself out.
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    Jan 09, 2010 11:59 PM GMT
    SeaSon saidOne of you is going to have to move if this does turn into something. I vote for the younger one (sorry icon_smile.gif )

    I've been there. Travelled 6000 miles for a semi-blind date with a guy I'd been communicating with for 6 months. Ended up being my most significant relationship to date and I was the one that moved. Sometimes you just have to follow your heart. It beats listening to "logic" and wondering "what could have happened" for years to come.



    I agree with this so much - follow your heart - take that chance as it could be the best thing to ever happen in your life. If you don't you will always wonder what could have been.
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    Jan 10, 2010 4:47 PM GMT
    so many things to consider, I agree with the thought of letting it develope over a period of time, but how much do you really know about him other than you had a great weekend together. When people are on vacation, they are on their best behavior and just having fun. Enjoy talking with him, find out more and see if it "clicks"
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    Jan 10, 2010 4:49 PM GMT
    NO LDR'S, PERIOD!
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    Jan 10, 2010 4:49 PM GMT
    NJDewd saidGo for it! I wish I lived in Houston icon_smile.gif


    Why is that?
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    Jan 10, 2010 5:01 PM GMT
    One weekend isn't enough to start worrying about who's going to move. Especially when that weekend includes New Year's Eve.
    if you go on seeing each other and you still feel this way in 6 months then you might give this some more thought. In the meantime just enjoy the dates for what they are.
    I hate to break this to you but more often than not, long-distance infatuations tend to peter out as you see more of each other. As the novelty fades you tend to realize that the new guy isn't more appealing than what's available to you in the local dating pool without the geographic inconvenience.
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    Jan 10, 2010 11:37 PM GMT
    Aggieboy said
    NJDewd saidGo for it! I wish I lived in Houston icon_smile.gif


    Why is that?


    so I could go for it with you icon_razz.gif
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    Jan 10, 2010 11:42 PM GMT
    It sounds like you already have your answer.
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    Jan 10, 2010 11:43 PM GMT
    NJDewd said
    Aggieboy said
    NJDewd saidGo for it! I wish I lived in Houston icon_smile.gif


    Why is that?


    so I could go for it with you icon_razz.gif


    lol, silly cat
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 13, 2010 2:42 PM GMT
    A cock don't reach accross state lines. You should see how your weekends go. You visit him...he visits you...then go from there. Don't pick up and move and throw your life up in the air. We are not dykes. LOL