The Perfect Gym

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 08, 2008 4:26 PM GMT
    If you could create the perfect gym, what would it be like? What rules and regulations would you have, and how would you enforce them? What about pricing structure and handling the newbies who make our lives miserable in January? Would you offer anything different from what typical gyms have now?
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    Jan 08, 2008 6:13 PM GMT
    If you didn't re-rack your weights after using them your membership would be revoked.
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    Jan 08, 2008 6:19 PM GMT
    When I walked in, everybody else would walk out and wait until I was finished before coming back in.
  • fitnfunmich

    Posts: 181

    Jan 08, 2008 6:38 PM GMT
    You need a personal recommendation from an existing member to join. Members may be available to interview for such recommendations in a private room in back of the gym. icon_twisted.gif
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    Jan 08, 2008 7:13 PM GMT
    It would have a strict dress code, hot guys walking round in jocks icon_razz.gif
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    Jan 08, 2008 7:17 PM GMT
    As long as it has a high bar and a set of rings, I'm good!
  • BlackJock79

    Posts: 437

    Jan 08, 2008 7:24 PM GMT
    AMT87 saidIt would have a strict dress code, hot guys walking round in jocks icon_razz.gif


    You just read my mind. icon_lol.gif I was going to say naked but then I thought about gym safety and if someone were to get their dick caught in a machine. That would hurt. But it they were hot I'd kiss it and make it better. icon_biggrin.gif LOL

    I like the gym I'm a member of now. Planet Fitness. Open 24 hours Monday - Thursday, Fridays closed at 9pm, Sat-Sun 7am-7pm. $10 a month, NO COMMITMENT. The only thing I would change is for them to have a basketball/volleyball court, tennis/badmitton court, racketball court, and a swimming pool.
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    Jan 08, 2008 7:28 PM GMT
    NO CELL PHONES.
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    Jan 08, 2008 7:35 PM GMT
    *Fully stocked like the biggest, best, most up-to-date gym in the land. No A/C, but with 10-metre high ceilings and industrial fans.

    *A Door Whore to keep the January crowds on the footpath for hours on end and to hand-select my Training Buddy of the Day.

    *A Bordello-themed décor; a place where buckskin chaps are the only sensible activewear. Red everything, it's so invigorating!

    *Completely devoid of people except those that I've hired or for friends and acquaintances granted full-price day passes.

    *No greatest hits compilations allowed, certainly none featuring the words "Golden", "Decade", "Era", "Smash" or "Hits".

    *A Personal Trainer-slash-Weight Caddy-slash-Barman-slash-Baggage Handler-slash-Windexer.

    *A Receptionist-slash-Masseuse-slash-Esthetician-slash-Deejay-slash-Laundress.

    *No rules. Or rather, they'd be subject to change on a whim – to mix things up and keep it fresh.

    *And an Orgasmatron™ for those pitiful, testosterone-deficient over-27s that haven't a prescription for Chucky's anti-aging elixir!
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    Jan 08, 2008 7:55 PM GMT
    There would be a dessert cart.
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    Jan 08, 2008 8:04 PM GMT
    Open 24/7 w/ a live DJ

    no fucking kids allowed! Get daycare somewhere else bitch!!
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    Jan 08, 2008 8:12 PM GMT
    Full-fat cocaïne on the energy bar!

    And real meat in the protein shakes!
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    Jan 08, 2008 8:14 PM GMT
    And no girls allowed, just like in The He-Man Woman Hater's Club.

    Well, except for maybe Darla.
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    Jan 08, 2008 9:11 PM GMT
    Martini bar?
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    Jan 08, 2008 9:24 PM GMT
    You're on a roll, Aero, between Miss Piggy and the Orgasmatron.

    Just for you: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1J-CBj1e-I
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    Jan 08, 2008 9:37 PM GMT
    lissenup, grazie mille bello! Adoro assolutamente il suo Woody!

    Merci d'avoir choisi un vidéoclip avec des sous-titres en français!

    ;-D
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    Jan 08, 2008 10:09 PM GMT
    De nada, mi amigo.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jan 08, 2008 11:22 PM GMT
    You need to submit a CV

    with pictures face...shirtless
    and in gymclothes

    SASE needs to be enclosed icon_wink.gif
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    Jan 09, 2008 1:14 AM GMT
    enough equipments that only 1/2 are use at pick hrs.
    All cardio equipments has build in tv and internet access.
    A complementary energy drink bar and snake area.
    A complementary massage per visit and resting area.
    A water spa, jet massages of all kinds, and huge indoor pool.
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    Jan 09, 2008 1:20 AM GMT
    snake area???? ... icon_eek.gif
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    Jan 09, 2008 1:24 AM GMT
    Wouldn't the snake area just be the steam room?
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    Jan 09, 2008 1:56 AM GMT
    LOL, snack bar!
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    Jan 09, 2008 2:32 PM GMT
    alright, add the snake farm there too. We all like to pet some snake, right?
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    Jan 09, 2008 4:50 PM GMT
    Okay I officially dont want a snake petting zoo in my gym. icon_eek.gif
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    Jan 09, 2008 5:34 PM GMT
    How about just a petting zoo? icon_wink.gif