rvaguy86 saidhad some random hookups and really just dont like it. always feels uncomfortable after and regretful. i would like to find a guy to casually date and hang out regularly. however, im not out yet at all and not sure if im ready for it either. is it possible to start dating in this situation? how does one go about finding someone to date? not into the whole gay bar scene. i just feel like its really hard to find another guy to date if i wanted to. i dont even know anyone who is gay
Sure it is. You won't have it that easy, obviously, since guys won't really be able to find you easily in the closet. You'll have to find them during those moments when you crack open the door and look out. You might already know plenty of guys who are attracted to men - even you - but haven't revealed themselves to you because you're "straight" and probably not comfortable talking about "the gay thing" (just an assumption - I could be wrong).
Now if you don't want to look where you KNOW the guys will be gay - i.e. a gay bar - then you'll have to check out other places they'll be, like a straight-gay alliance, a gay bookstore (do any still exist or has the Internet killed them all?) , a pride parade, a gay beach... well, you get the idea: if it has the word "gay" in it, you'll probably meet some there.
You don't have to find a boyfriend first. First you need gay friends and then you go with them to parties where other gay guys will be and you meet them in the relaxed environment of someone's home and then you let them see how cool of a bf you'd be and then they hound you until you agree to date them.
That's how easy it is.