Feeling AWESOME!!

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    Jan 19, 2010 8:41 AM GMT
    So my dad found out about me being gay (typical religious freak dad) and sent me an a letter, because that's how he talks to me, about his views. So in return, I wrote him a letter. For once I stood up to my dad yippee! Kind of a long read..sorry! icon_smile.gif

    Dad
    I decided not to respond to your email because I felt I would say something I would regret. I really have no idea where to begin, but whatever

    As you may or may not have suspected, you are not the first to know about me being gay. Infact, you are not the first person in the family to know. The first person I told was Nick, a year ago. I had no idea what he was going to think, and I was a little scared, however he was happy for me, and supports me. I told Julie after him who also was extremely supportive for me, to which after I find out that Julie’s mom is a lesbian who has been together and married with her wife for 10 years. Aunt Pooh and Uncle Jimmy also know, who both have been supportive. Also Seth, who keeps telling me I need to talk to you.

    You may think that I “chose” this “lifestyle” last night. I did not. Believe it or not, I knew I was different since I was in kindergarten. You have only known about me being gay for what? A day? I’ve been dealing with it for my whole lifetime. You think I was happy when I found out? I was devastated, depressed, I hated a lot of things, including myself. You have no idea what I was going through. I began talking to many people, teachers in high school, my friends, people I’ve met like Mrs. McNulty from retreat. They have all helped me and listened to me with what I’ve been dealing with. Only recently have I began feeling happy for myself, finally I have become comfortable with who I am, and then you emailed me.

    When I first got your email, it should be no surprise that I was upset. I talked to Julie and Mrs. McNulty, Julie says I need to give you time, and to take out what some of the things Mrs. McNulty said, she said the same thing as Julie. Granted with Mrs. McNulty never meeting you, her only impressions of you have not been so good. She read your letter to me when I went on senior retreat, many adults did, not one was pleased with you. I believe she said, “I wanted to rip it up it was terrible, who says that to their child?”, when I told her about the email you sent me a couple days ago I heard, “This again?” I destroyed your letter to me from retreat, it was a piece of shit.

    Every single one of my friends laughed at you, or has told me they don’t like you. Shelbi was absolutely appalled by what you said to me, “I cant believe he said this to his son, I’ll beat him up”. Here’s another “he's sounding like a hypocrite
    preaching tolerance, yet being intolerant of his own son. How do you say that to your own kid
    that you claim to love so much”

    You’re my father dad, not my personal priest. You’re supposed to accept me. Though yes I know having a gay child isn’t supposed to be on what you want your kids to become, you should accept them with loving arms, not telling them that they will go to hell.

    On the subject of religion. I do have to say I respect you on how it is so important to you, however it is your biggest, and greatest flaw. It has created an ignorant man, and creates many more throughout the world.

    I understand how you want me to live a Christian life, however im 19 years old, going to be 20 this year. I think I’m old enough to make my own decisions about religion. This goes for Tom too, because I think he feels the same way. Let US decide on if we want religion to be a part of our lives, not you. You shoving religion down my throat is not an effective way for 2 reasons.

    1. To me, I feel like it is a threat, and my reaction is to block it and run away. Thus I rebel and chose not to go to church etc
    2. Even if I decided to “be religious” because you force me to, then I am only acting like I love god at church. With that, I am still not a “real Christian” because I am only acting it to have you shut up.

    Leave me, and Tom, alone about religion. Let us decide if we want it to be a part of our lives. I’m not asking, I’m telling.

    I don’t know what else to tell you, that I love you? I don’t know if I can say that right now.

    I decided to write you this letter, because honestly I know how you are like during debates, you are like Tom, you won’t let the other person finish and will yell to make your point come across, which is ineffective and hurts the situation more. I hope you understand that.

    Christian

    Ps. Despite your assumptions and predictions, I do not have HIV, I haven’t had sex ever. Though yes, HIV is common in homosexuals, and heterosexuals, I’m not a crazy whore who will have sex unprotected, and without asking if the other person is clean or not. Also, HIV is not a virus that is given to every gay person in their life eventually, believe it or not. I’m not ignorant about sex, but thank you for your concern.
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Jan 19, 2010 8:58 AM GMT
    I read every word, and I'm extremely impressed.
    You are so wise beyond your years.
    I don't think that you could have handled the situation any better.

    For a lot of parents, finding out that their kid will not turn out the way they want them to be, is a disappointment, and sometimes a shock, especially when it flies in the face of their religious beliefs.

    So, your dad has a lot of thinking to do.
    I hope that he realizes that he has a pretty amazing and wonderful son.
    He's very lucky.

    All the best to you.
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    Jan 19, 2010 9:16 AM GMT
    I am now actually curious as to what your dad wrote.

    But gratz. Hope he'll come around someday.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Jan 19, 2010 11:41 AM GMT
    applause.gif
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    Jan 19, 2010 1:03 PM GMT
    Good job man...eventually we all have to stand up and be our own man.

    My dad is an ex-marine that was in the vietnam war. I grew in a household where everytime someone gay came on tv he said they should be sent to cuba and shot....I don't know why cuba...

    Anyway, when I came out to my family about 5 years ago he said he didn't want me and my bf in his house, he couldn't handle it.

    I said fine...then your not welcome in my house because I dont want alcoholics in my house. Its so funny that all these people consider themselves christians but refuse to look at their own life and what they do themselves.

    They are to busy judging everyone else....I thought Christian meant "Christ Like". guess not.

    He and my family eventually came around after a year of me cutting them out of my life totally. They realized I was serious and how fucking stupid they were being.

    They don't have to accept it or like it or agree with it...but this is us, take it or leave it.

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    Jan 19, 2010 1:52 PM GMT
    "On the subject of religion . . . it is your biggest, and greatest flaw. It has created an ignorant man"

    WHAT great phrasing! Fits my own Bible-thumping Dad perfectly.

    I am very glad someone else has the testicular fortitude to say this shit to a disapproving Dad -I dropped a very similar letter to my own Dad this past October. Please keep us updated and, like Sedative, I am curious about the e-mail your Dad sent.

    Hope your letter causes your Dad to think long and hard. Best of luck!

    -Ryan
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    Jan 19, 2010 3:02 PM GMT
    Feeling Awesome... indeed.

    My Man Of The Day
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    Jan 19, 2010 3:09 PM GMT
    Congratulations for standing your ground, must be a release to have finally come out to your dad...the way you expressed your feelings and emotions shows your wiser beyond your years. I honestly admire guys like you
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    Jan 19, 2010 3:13 PM GMT
    applause_line.jpg
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    Jan 19, 2010 3:28 PM GMT
    Man of the day vote from me, too. Very, very brave.

  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Jan 19, 2010 3:30 PM GMT
    Congratulations on standing your ground with your dad. Try to be patient with him, remembering that parents often-times have a hard time with the revelation that their child is gay. It's not that they don't care, or that they love you any less, but their fear of the unknown, and ignorance and stereotypes they have grown up with are all swirling around them within their normal comfort zone....and it can be traumatizing to them too in the beginning. Remember your Dad came from a different time, and a different mindset about homosexuality than perhaps you have grown up with and come to know, so give him time to process and come to terms with this bombshell you have dropped on him. Perhaps it's a good thing that your communication about this with your dad is through letters, as they can often-times express your true feelings better than face-to-face contact allows.

    Good luck, and hang in there!!!
  • ShanksE

    Posts: 263

    Jan 19, 2010 3:53 PM GMT
    CuriousJockAZ said .. and it can be traumatizing to them too in the beginning. Remember your Dad came from a different time, and a different mindset about homosexuality than perhaps you have grown up with and come to know, so give him time to process and come to terms with this bombshell you have dropped on him.


    To begin with, congratulations on being able to come out to your family. Howeve, I completely agree with CJ. Our parents have great dreams about us, our future. Dads especially want their sons to be like them, to be the shining members of their society! It is difficult for them to understand what we have been through....initially! You wrote in your letter that you went through a period of self -hate too when you first found out, and this despite the fact that you have been brought up in today's day and age where homosexuality is openly talked about. Imagine how difficult it must be for your father who is from a different time, like CJ said.

    He needs time to perceive things the way you do. Give him the time and tell him how much you need his support. It will be dificult for him, perhaps on religious grounds or for other reasons. But you need to be there for him just as much as you expect him to be there for you. Hey after all, he is your dad. Give him that chance.

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    Jan 19, 2010 3:59 PM GMT
    voted motd.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:00 PM GMT
    SOme people asked for the letter he wrote to me. so here it is. Long reads

    QUOTE AUTHOR GOES HERE17 January 2010

    Dear Christian,

    Mom told me the other day you have declared your homosexuality on facebook. As you can probably guess, no parent calls family and friends over the joy of one of their children declaring them self homosexual.

    Of course you know I am not happy with your choice and this letter is only speaking for me. You were raised a Christian and you know what you have chosen is wrong and condemns you to an existence without God when you eventually die. In fact, you had already chosen a life that excludes God from your life now and you will find plenty of people who will cheer you and support you with elation for this decision.

    Homosexuality as a tendency one may have is not the sin, but the indulgence in it is. We all have sinful tendencies and some of us have chronic faults that seem to be at times insurmountable despite prayer, confession and repeated promises to do better. But the important thing is we never give up and know that turning away from the sin is necessary. The struggle makes us personally stronger and more understanding and sympathetic of those around us who appear not to be able to confront their personal evil(s). The struggle, and we all struggle in the faith if we are trying, creates within us humility and tolerance. Tolerance is not the acceptance of sin, we reject the sin, but the acceptance of the affected individual as a fellow child of God.

    A virtue you appear to lack is humility. Humility shows respect for oneself and others, we admit to our weaknesses and equality with our fellow man. (Christ humbled himself to become one of us, a human of flesh and bone, and instructed us if we want to be great, we must be the least and serve the others.)

    God loves us no matter what even, if at the time of our death, we have chosen to ignore and reject Him. We condemn ourselves, and with God never violating our free will, we enter into the eternity without Him as described in the Bible and elsewhere.

    The mystery of God’s need for us may be partly explained in His need for love. All of creation is wonderful and stupendous, but it does not recognize Him, it does not love Him, no more than your most prized possession loves you. Creating a being with free will was His solution. He, like us, knows the value and satisfaction of being loved by someone who gives it freely, the ultimate gift we all desire and need. But it comes at a terrible price; the need to allow us to reject Him, His creation and His children sometimes thru acts of hate and violence.

    Turn your back on this sin you have accepted as normal, which parts of His creation celebrate as a wonderful normal alternative. Turn back to the Lord, without Him you have no reference as to what is good. Anything goes if you reject Him. Your Catholic faith will guide and save you. (Notice, I did not say the Catholic Church). I would certainly help you if you ask.

    Christian, I have said it before, I will say it until I die, I love you very much. I condemn your sin, not you.

    With Love, in Christ,


    PS As a practical note, get yourself regularly checked for HIV. In developed societies it is the young homosexual male who has a high incidence of the virus, of course the other high risk groups are IV drug abusers and sexually promiscuous heterosexuals. (You don’t have to believe me, look it up yourself) I would get it checked about six weeks after your last sexual contact. (you can do this at student health in confidence/privacy) I would not share any object where there is the potential of sharing blood, like razors. A family with someone positive for HIV is not at significant risk for getting HIV from normal family contact. However, I ask you let us know if you become HIV positive, we could then take appropriate precautions if you injure yourself and sustain an open wound.





    He responded today to my letter I sent him. Here it is:

    QUOTE AUTHOR GOES HEREDear Christian,

    Good letter. The beauty of letters is we have to organize our thoughts, and as you pointed out, limits our ability to say things we might regret in the heat of conversation (or yelling), at least gives us time to think before we decide to write something regretable.

    I stand completely by my letter, to include the one sent to you on retreat. Everything you say confirms what I said. Your friends condemnation of me is of no consequence. I have many regrets, things I wish I could have done differently, things I should have said differently, those letters are not one of them.

    You are not a regret of mine. As a quaint saying goes, God does not make junk. You are His gift to me, He has entrusted you to me. I would not give you back if were even possible.

    It appears I am a voice who will say what you don't want to hear, who will not play along with the world and agree to an alternate morality. You and your supporters call this closed mindedness, this is nothing new.

    I am not religous, you may think I am, but I am so far from holy it would embarrass you to know. I pray daily and go to confession regularly, if I could I would go to Mass daily (I came close to this when I was in Afghanistan). I am simply someone who is trying. But I will not compromise when it comes to basic moral principles, even if at times I fail to follow them (do you see the reason for the sacrament of confession?) There are people and groups who would condemn you and tell you what an awful person you are for your homosexuality, I am not one of them.

    I am not silly enough to think I was going to change you by a simple letter. As I mentioned, we live our lives and will be held accountable in due time. I have said it enough times to you and your brothers, our home is not here on earth, but with God.

    I have no problem with you being angry with me, and yes, I do have to deal with the situation. But I can assure you it will not be by acceptance of homosexuality as a normal lifestyle choice. That will never happen, but it does not mean I don't love you and accept you as my son. Know the difference.

    I have worked with and respect homosexuals whom I have had the privelege of knowing in my life. I don't say this in a paternalistic or haughty superior mind set, I am in no position to condemn people and I have only to look into myself to know my unworthiness to do this let alone know I am not allowed this by God. I am not 'better' than them or you.

    I love you even if you decide you must hate me. I am not your enemy. I am you dad.



    With love,

    ..... Dad




    I haven't responded back..I'm not really sure what to say..so I'm just going to wait until I'm able to think of something..
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:04 PM GMT
    Btw are the names original? you *might* want to change them or make them initials.... up to you.

    My dad also gave me the confused AIDS speech, only his came out as "gay men.... can be very dangerous.... be careful".

    icon_lol.gif

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    Jan 19, 2010 4:10 PM GMT
    Lostboy saidBtw are the names original? you *might* want to change them or make them initials.... up to you.

    My dad also gave me the confused AIDS speech, only his came out as "gay men.... can be very dangerous.... be careful".

    icon_lol.gif



    Sorry I haven't had time to change names icon_sad.gif

    Thank you everyone for your comments, they mean a lot.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:21 PM GMT
    You've done a good job standing up for yourself and in talking with the people you know and respect. I read your dad's letter as well. It sounds like you've both kept the communication door open. Give it some time. Let your dad see (over time) that you are a fine, responsible, intelligent son -- one that he or anyone would be proud of. Just keep standing tall - with integrity - and show him the best example of how great a gay man can be. That's what I do in my family. I just show my family (and anyone I come into contact with) that a gay man is full of integrity and intelligence - tolerance, kindness......and a good guy to know and have around.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Jan 19, 2010 4:21 PM GMT
    Christian -

    Thank you for allowing us into your personal life and letting us read this letter from your dad. To be honest, having read the letter now from your dad, he does not in any way shape or form sound like a monster. In fact, quite the opposite. He sounds like an intelligent, loving, caring, good man who has very strong moral values that he holds dear to his heart. Personally, I find that an admirable trait. It would not be fair for you, or anyone, to condemn him for his values any more than it is fair for someone to condemn you for yours. The challenge here is finding that "middle ground" where you and your dad can find a place of peace and understanding. It sounds to me like you have a wonderful father who loves you unconditionally, regardless of how he may feel on issues of homosexuality. That is so much more than many can claim. Be thankful that your dad is the kind of man he is -- hard as it may be to relate to or understand at times -- count that as a blessing, not something to turn away from. Your father will come to terms with this in his own time, and in his own way. Give him the same understanding you expect from him.

    Good luck,
    Todd
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:25 PM GMT
    agree with curious jock, though the language of "lifestyle choice" is something that you must always disagree with him on. You do not chose to be gay, and trying to repress it as religious conservatives advise will only lead to loneliness and depression and an eventual explosion. Sounds like you will not be taking the sleep around/party animal approach to guys, so just let him have time.
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:28 PM GMT
    CuriousJockAZ saidChristian -

    Thank you for allowing us into your personal life and letting us read this letter from your dad. To be honest, having read the letter now from your dad, he does not in any way shape or form sound like a monster. In fact, quite the opposite. He sounds like an intelligent, loving, caring, good man who has very strong moral values that he holds dear to his heart. Personally, I find that an admirable trait. It would not be fair for you, or anyone, to condemn him for his values any more than it is fair for someone to condemn you for yours. The challenge here is finding that "middle ground" where you and your dad can find a place of peace and understanding. It sounds to me like you have a wonderful father who loves you unconditionally, regardless of how he may feel on issues of homosexuality. That is so much more than many can claim. Be thankful that your dad is the kind of man he is -- hard as it may be to relate to or understand at times -- count that as a blessing, not something to turn away from. Your father will come to terms with this in his own time, and in his own way. Give him the same understanding you expect from him.

    Good luck,
    Todd


    Thank you. I talked about some other things outside of me being gay that I have issues with my dad..it might appear that I'm attacking him like I've snapped, but there were other things I felt I needed to say to him that I've never said to him.

    Thank you though for your words, I know my dad loves me very much, but I guess I feel a bit frustrated at his stubborness, which is all I can see so far, unfortunetly I have it too lol. I guess the only thing I can do is just wait. I don't mind fixing my relationship with him, and I'll be happy to explain anything to him, but if he will never accept me for being gay, then there's nothing I can do.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:31 PM GMT
    Wow.

    Just...wow.

    You should be so proud of yourself for standing up for yourself and who you are, as "God" made you. Your father's reply (so very Catholic hate the sin love the sinner) no doubt presents a challenge to your ongoing relationship with him, but I imagine you have the fortitude to navigate that.

    If only more gay people had your courage...to be out and stand up for themselves in the face of opposing forces.
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    Jan 19, 2010 4:41 PM GMT
    Christian16 saidSOme people asked for the letter he wrote to me. so here it is. Long reads

    QUOTE AUTHOR GOES HERE17 January 2010

    Dear Christian,

    Mom told me the other day you have declared your homosexuality on facebook. As you can probably guess, no parent calls family and friends over the joy of one of their children declaring them self homosexual.

    Of course you know I am not happy with your choice and this letter is only speaking for me. You were raised a Christian and you know what you have chosen is wrong and condemns you to an existence without God when you eventually die. In fact, you had already chosen a life that excludes God from your life now and you will find plenty of people who will cheer you and support you with elation for this decision.

    Homosexuality as a tendency one may have is not the sin, but the indulgence in it is. We all have sinful tendencies and some of us have chronic faults that seem to be at times insurmountable despite prayer, confession and repeated promises to do better. But the important thing is we never give up and know that turning away from the sin is necessary. The struggle makes us personally stronger and more understanding and sympathetic of those around us who appear not to be able to confront their personal evil(s). The struggle, and we all struggle in the faith if we are trying, creates within us humility and tolerance. Tolerance is not the acceptance of sin, we reject the sin, but the acceptance of the affected individual as a fellow child of God.

    A virtue you appear to lack is humility. Humility shows respect for oneself and others, we admit to our weaknesses and equality with our fellow man. (Christ humbled himself to become one of us, a human of flesh and bone, and instructed us if we want to be great, we must be the least and serve the others.)

    God loves us no matter what even, if at the time of our death, we have chosen to ignore and reject Him. We condemn ourselves, and with God never violating our free will, we enter into the eternity without Him as described in the Bible and elsewhere.

    The mystery of God’s need for us may be partly explained in His need for love. All of creation is wonderful and stupendous, but it does not recognize Him, it does not love Him, no more than your most prized possession loves you. Creating a being with free will was His solution. He, like us, knows the value and satisfaction of being loved by someone who gives it freely, the ultimate gift we all desire and need. But it comes at a terrible price; the need to allow us to reject Him, His creation and His children sometimes thru acts of hate and violence.

    Turn your back on this sin you have accepted as normal, which parts of His creation celebrate as a wonderful normal alternative. Turn back to the Lord, without Him you have no reference as to what is good. Anything goes if you reject Him. Your Catholic faith will guide and save you. (Notice, I did not say the Catholic Church). I would certainly help you if you ask.

    Christian, I have said it before, I will say it until I die, I love you very much. I condemn your sin, not you.

    With Love, in Christ,


    PS As a practical note, get yourself regularly checked for HIV. In developed societies it is the young homosexual male who has a high incidence of the virus, of course the other high risk groups are IV drug abusers and sexually promiscuous heterosexuals. (You don’t have to believe me, look it up yourself) I would get it checked about six weeks after your last sexual contact. (you can do this at student health in confidence/privacy) I would not share any object where there is the potential of sharing blood, like razors. A family with someone positive for HIV is not at significant risk for getting HIV from normal family contact. However, I ask you let us know if you become HIV positive, we could then take appropriate precautions if you injure yourself and sustain an open wound.





    He responded today to my letter I sent him. Here it is:

    QUOTE AUTHOR GOES HEREDear Christian,

    Good letter. The beauty of letters is we have to organize our thoughts, and as you pointed out, limits our ability to say things we might regret in the heat of conversation (or yelling), at least gives us time to think before we decide to write something regretable.

    I stand completely by my letter, to include the one sent to you on retreat. Everything you say confirms what I said. Your friends condemnation of me is of no consequence. I have many regrets, things I wish I could have done differently, things I should have said differently, those letters are not one of them.

    You are not a regret of mine. As a quaint saying goes, God does not make junk. You are His gift to me, He has entrusted you to me. I would not give you back if were even possible.

    It appears I am a voice who will say what you don't want to hear, who will not play along with the world and agree to an alternate morality. You and your supporters call this closed mindedness, this is nothing new.

    I am not religous, you may think I am, but I am so far from holy it would embarrass you to know. I pray daily and go to confession regularly, if I could I would go to Mass daily (I came close to this when I was in Afghanistan). I am simply someone who is trying. But I will not compromise when it comes to basic moral principles, even if at times I fail to follow them (do you see the reason for the sacrament of confession?) There are people and groups who would condemn you and tell you what an awful person you are for your homosexuality, I am not one of them.

    I am not silly enough to think I was going to change you by a simple letter. As I mentioned, we live our lives and will be held accountable in due time. I have said it enough times to you and your brothers, our home is not here on earth, but with God.

    I have no problem with you being angry with me, and yes, I do have to deal with the situation. But I can assure you it will not be by acceptance of homosexuality as a normal lifestyle choice. That will never happen, but it does not mean I don't love you and accept you as my son. Know the difference.

    I have worked with and respect homosexuals whom I have had the privelege of knowing in my life. I don't say this in a paternalistic or haughty superior mind set, I am in no position to condemn people and I have only to look into myself to know my unworthiness to do this let alone know I am not allowed this by God. I am not 'better' than them or you.

    I love you even if you decide you must hate me. I am not your enemy. I am you dad.



    With love,

    ..... Dad



    I haven't responded back..I'm not really sure what to say..so I'm just going to wait until I'm able to think of something..




    You have a great loving Dad.
  • pav1

    Posts: 68

    Jan 19, 2010 4:53 PM GMT
    This video says it all for me.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-zhNiGlogQ&feature=player_embedded#

  • drypin

    Posts: 1798

    Jan 19, 2010 4:57 PM GMT
    I wholeheartedly chime in with the others that you are show remarkable and refreshing maturity. For whatever part your father might have played in that, you can also be grateful.

    I'm not certain, like some of the others have said, that your father will eventually "come around" on this issue, but there's always hope. And it does break my heart to think of your father forever feeling he has to help you turn away from "the sin" rather than supporting you in your quest to find love in the form most suited to you. I wish you all the strength of will you might need to help your father "see the light"; you certainly have proven that you already have the character for it.

    -Jim
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Jan 19, 2010 5:05 PM GMT
    Christian -

    Three things that your dad said stand out to me more than anything else.

    "God does not make junk. You are His gift to me, He has entrusted you to me. I would not give you back if were even possible"


    and...


    "There are people and groups who would condemn you and tell you what an awful person you are for your homosexuality, I am not one of them".

    and...

    "I love you even if you decide you must hate me. I am not your enemy. I am your dad"


    These are the things you should focus on and remember where your dad is concerned. It's what I mean when I say "count your blessings".

    I'll give you a different scenario that I saw with my own eyes when I lived in Los Angeles. Two friends of mine were identical twins. They were the most beautiful, fun, intelligent, caring young men you could imagine. The kind of sons that any parent would be proud to have and cherish. They were both gay and struggled very deeply with coming out to their mom who was deeply religious and a devout christian. They finally got up the nerve to tell her. You can only imagine the double whammy of not one, but BOTH sons coming to a parent at the same time with the revelation that they are gay. Her reaction was astounding. She told them that she could no longer consider them her sons. She told them that their homosexuality, in her mind, made them worse than a child molester. She threw them both out of her house. Can you imagine the pain that those two wonderful young men faced at such rejection from their own mother? It pains me to this day to even think about how a mother, not to mention one who claims to be a christian, could treat her own sons in such a cruel, thoughtless, and selfish way. Regardless, through time, communication, and mutual understanding, even that closed-minded horrible mother came around and today those fine young men have a much better relationship with their mother.

    I relay this story simply to illustrate how truly blessed you are to have a father who, in spite of his own personal struggle with coming to terms with your homosexuality, still loves you deeply and embraces you as his son.