Shower Situation

  • yehyeh88

    Posts: 6

    Jan 24, 2010 12:18 AM GMT
    So I've been working out with my friend for a couple of months now, on and off, and are workouts and friendship are progressing nicely. After our session, we hit the changing rooms and head to the showers. We change in the quieter changing rooms, the other ones are pretty busy and to be honest quite intimidating. When it comes to showering with other guys, i'm not that bothered. i wear glasses, so in the showers i can't see a thing. with my friend though, i'm not that comfortable. when we shower together i'll either go on the other side of the commual showers, away from him, or go in the one private showe. i guess i feel uncomfortable being naked beside him, plus i hate that he can see everything whilst i a blind man without my glasses. just wondering if anyone else has had a similar situation with a workout buddie? the guy is also gay.
  • Glorfindel

    Posts: 277

    Jan 24, 2010 12:33 AM GMT
    You could always wear your glasses in the shower....

    an old creepy guy does that at my gym. He is none too subtle about checking guys out in the shower either. I swear he goes there just to stand in the shower; I never see him on the workout floor. One time I saw him heading for the showers right as I got to the gym.... he was still in the shower when I got done with my entire workout.

    okay, on second thought, don't wear your glasses in the shower... icon_lol.gif
  • yehyeh88

    Posts: 6

    Jan 24, 2010 12:40 AM GMT
    Ha, I can't do that. I'd look like a young creeper, lurking in the showers. Plus it gets steamy... . .
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Jan 24, 2010 12:49 AM GMT
    Glorfindel saidYou could always wear your glasses in the shower....

    an old creepy guy does that at my gym. He is none too subtle about checking guys out in the shower either. I swear he goes there just to stand in the shower; I never see him on the workout floor. One time I saw him heading for the showers right as I got to the gym.... he was still in the shower when I got done with my entire workout.

    okay, on second thought, don't wear your glasses in the shower... icon_lol.gif




    This appears to be a general trend at most of the gyms I've belonged too. Seriously, tell the gym management, they might not even be aware of the situation. Just because they are older doesn't give them a free pass to be peeping pervs.
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    Jan 24, 2010 1:33 AM GMT
    Glorfindel saidYou could always wear your glasses in the shower....

    an old creepy guy does that at my gym. He is none too subtle about checking guys out in the shower either. I swear he goes there just to stand in the shower; I never see him on the workout floor. One time I saw him heading for the showers right as I got to the gym.... he was still in the shower when I got done with my entire workout.

    okay, on second thought, don't wear your glasses in the shower... icon_lol.gif


    That is so true, and it creeps my out a lot. Usually I end up running out as soon as possible and never get to hit Hot Tub as much as I would like to.

    On the other hand for the actual question: don't worry about him checking you out, if he checks you out regularly, he will ask you out pretty soon, else what good would it do to you even if you saw him naked.
  • jrs1

    Posts: 4388

    Jan 24, 2010 3:40 AM GMT
    Glorfindel saidan old creepy guy does that ... He is none too subtle about checking guys out in the shower either.


    ugh ...
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    Jan 24, 2010 7:22 AM GMT
    He's just a workout buddie. Maybe you want something more since you say your friendship is progressing nicely?

    If your goal is too see each other naked, then yeah you can wear your contacts but make sure its cold water. I took a shower with my contacts with warm water and the veins in my eyes weren't happy with me at all.
  • imperator

    Posts: 626

    Jan 24, 2010 7:56 AM GMT
    yehyeh88 saidSo I've been working out with my friend for a couple of months now, on and off, and are workouts and friendship are progressing nicely. After our session, we hit the changing rooms and head to the showers. We change in the quieter changing rooms, the other ones are pretty busy and to be honest quite intimidating. When it comes to showering with other guys, i'm not that bothered. i wear glasses, so in the showers i can't see a thing. with my friend though, i'm not that comfortable. when we shower together i'll either go on the other side of the commual showers, away from him, or go in the one private showe. i guess i feel uncomfortable being naked beside him, plus i hate that he can see everything whilst i a blind man without my glasses. just wondering if anyone else has had a similar situation with a workout buddie? the guy is also gay.


    I can maybe relate; I've only been in the changing rooms at a gym with anyone I knew a couple of times. When it's strangers around-- hot or not-- I'm a little shy but I can compartmentalize and say "meh, bunch of strangers, maybe zero contact in the future, to hell with it if they see me nekkid." It's all business and even if there's someone I'd like to look at there's the social boundary that says "if you *must* peek keep it furtive, they're a stranger, and if they notice hopefully we can both pretend it didn't happen.* But if it's someone I'm friends with (gay, straight, whatever) and especially if they're someone I'm attracted to then there's already sort of a vulnerable feeling there and the notion of them seeing me all exposed-like-- especially if I were to get all piqued at them being naked neighbors-- is a bit more intimidating than with strangers.

    Who wants a friend teasing you for days/weeks/years afterwards with "dude, you were totally checking me out in the lockerroom-- I know you're in lust with me but it's not going to happen so stop fantasizing." icon_confused.gif

    My fix was always to tell the other guy "my side over here, your side over there. Avert your eyes, I may take other forms."
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    Jan 24, 2010 8:49 AM GMT
    Man, you worry to much.

    Don't sweat the small stuff.

    Unless you have real low self esteem, you really shouldn't care if someone sees you, or not, or about your buddy seeing you.

    I'd guess your weren't in high school sports or the military. You have to get past it all real fast there. It's part of the Real Jock thing.
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    Jan 24, 2010 9:36 AM GMT
    sexylatinboi saidmake sure its cold water. I took a shower with my contacts with warm water and the veins in my eyes weren't happy with me at all.


    Freak. Get new contacts


    Also, what is the big deal? Why is being naked SUCH a huge issue for you all?

  • PipHop

    Posts: 439

    Jan 24, 2010 9:51 AM GMT
    chuckystud saidMan, you worry to much.

    Don't sweat the small stuff.

    Unless you have real low self esteem, you really shouldn't care if someone sees you, or not, or about your buddy seeing you.

    I'd guess your weren't in high school sports or the military. You have to get past it all real fast there. It's part of the Real Jock thing.


    co-sign. focus on your shower annd not on people looking at you. if the guy is taking a look at you, oh well. after playing sports growing up and serving in the military, i can assure you that very fewer people are thinking of you as much as their thinking about themselves. plus, in the gay world, many guys don't have the patience to wait that long. if your buddy was checking you out and liked what he saw, he'd have brought it up in conversation already. just relax and enjoy the post workout time.
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    Jan 24, 2010 10:01 AM GMT
    SteamyWeenie saideh, idk. the friend naked thing kinda bugs me too.


    You need hotter friends then
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    Jan 24, 2010 10:52 AM GMT
    PipHop said
    chuckystud saidMan, you worry to much.

    Don't sweat the small stuff.

    Unless you have real low self esteem, you really shouldn't care if someone sees you, or not, or about your buddy seeing you.

    I'd guess your weren't in high school sports or the military. You have to get past it all real fast there. It's part of the Real Jock thing.


    co-sign. focus on your shower annd not on people looking at you. if the guy is taking a look at you, oh well. after playing sports growing up and serving in the military, i can assure you that very fewer people are thinking of you as much as their thinking about themselves. plus, in the gay world, many guys don't have the patience to wait that long. if your buddy was checking you out and liked what he saw, he'd have brought it up in conversation already. just relax and enjoy the post workout time.


    and another co-sign here. This all gets so overrated, too much mincing in the showers and changing rooms instead of focusing on why one is at a gym (ok, seems there are various motivations - I just prefer to stick to sports and my business, who cares about the others?).
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    Jan 24, 2010 12:33 PM GMT
    Lostboy said
    SteamyWeenie saideh, idk. the friend naked thing kinda bugs me too.


    You need hotter friends then


    Lost receives the award for response of the day. Come collect your prize icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 24, 2010 1:00 PM GMT
    In a locker room situation it doesn't really matter who sees you.
  • pav1

    Posts: 68

    Jan 24, 2010 2:00 PM GMT
    You look like a prude when you do that. Also, by going to the other side you are screaming out loud your hang-ups about showering with him. Keep a casual distance to show respect but don't go to the ther side and not a private shower. It's just a shower!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 24, 2010 2:20 PM GMT
    SteamyWeenie said i have these insane boundaries


    You said it.

    What´s my prize?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 24, 2010 2:59 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]Glorfindel said[/cite]You could always wear your glasses in the shower....

    an old creepy guy does that at my gym. He is none too subtle about checking guys out in the shower either

    oh yeah, I feel so sorry for them because they trap in the closet and some them are married with grandchildren *Misery loves company*
    icon_rolleyes.gif
  • MilitaryWolf

    Posts: 43

    Jan 24, 2010 3:04 PM GMT
    chuckystud saidMan, you worry to much.

    Don't sweat the small stuff.

    Unless you have real low self esteem, you really shouldn't care if someone sees you, or not, or about your buddy seeing you.

    I'd guess your weren't in high school sports or the military. You have to get past it all real fast there. It's part of the Real Jock thing.


    Yeah I agree. It's no big deal.

    I got used to it real quick being in the military and having communal showers.... haha... try getting over showering with people you have to work with.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2010 5:09 AM GMT
    I had a funny email this morning.

    The guy said "LOL. Don't sweat the SMALL STUFF." Not intended, but, pretty funny.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jan 25, 2010 1:49 PM GMT
    There's nothing wrong with modesty and don't let other people tell you there is. If you're not comfortable with something, don't do it.
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    Jan 25, 2010 2:09 PM GMT
    So, if I got this right, you are uncomfortable with him because he can check you out but you can't check him out.

    This isn't really an issue about showering or the gym. It sounds like this is an issue with your attraction to the guy.
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    Jan 25, 2010 3:17 PM GMT
    Timberoo saidThere's nothing wrong with modesty and don't let other people tell you there is. If you're not comfortable with something, don't do it.

    I suppose you're right, but I come from a generation that was just at the end of the era when the attitude was that men weren't authorized modesty, at least not among themselves. Modesty was a feminine trait, and men who exhibited it were suspected of being queer, somewhat the opposite of how we think today. The infrastructure simply wasn't designed to give you the option of being shy as a man.

    Virtually all showers were open gang, most Y and other all-male indoor swimming pools prohibited swim suits, and high school and college men's swim classes were nude, too. And the US Army went even further, with older latrines having no stalls around the toilets, all just out in the open (now THAT'S an experience, for which you have little alternative). And our enlisted entrance and annual group physicals were conducted in the nude, the men circulating between the different exam "stations" in one or more big rooms without a stitch on, and examined by the doctors and medics while everyone waiting behind you in line watched.

    (One of my fondest memories was an annual enlisted physical where the doctor had about 15 of us form a circle facing inward, all standing there nude, while he went around to give each of us a hernia cough test in turn, the other guys all able to watch quite clearly. Why he didn't have us at least face OUTWARD, backs to each other, isn't known to me, which would have achieved the same efficient result for him. Not quite as much fun as a circle jerk, but it was quite a sight I've never forgotten in 40 years. icon_biggrin.gif )
  • Latenight30

    Posts: 1525

    Jan 25, 2010 3:25 PM GMT
    Now the gym I go to has no showers.
    But, I have found a spa here where the men and women are separate and have invited friend to join.
    I am not bother in the lest by it. I too wear glasses so I'm somewhat at a disadvantage when it comes to checking guys out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 25, 2010 3:35 PM GMT
    I grew up playing sports (track and water polo) and I remember being in awe (back in high school) at how straight guys could take the showering so casually. I was thinking I was the only one checking other guys out (kind of like a fox in a hen house.). I was blown away at how all the guys shouted, joked, laughed, brushed their teeth, pissed, scrubbed their cocks and balls - kind of a party scene in those big gang shower rooms! Pretty quickly, I was doing the same things.........except for one difference: I was lusting after some of my teammates.
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