What to do when a girl kinda asks you out but not really.

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    Jan 29, 2010 1:37 AM GMT
    This is a dumb question, just so you all know... But I'm a dumb guy, so hey, wtf...

    There's this girl who works behind the juice bar at my gym who's always been really friendly to me. At first I thought she was that way to everyone just to sucker them into buying NrGize's expensive shit. Then I realized she's especially friendly to me. We talk very briefly every time I get to the gym, but we still don't know each other at all. Cut to the point.. today she invited me to a pot luck dinner that's going on tomorrow night. My boyfriend will be working and it's not like I have friends, so I have nothing better to do. And since I'm a pussy engulfing an awkward motherfucker, I told her I could go without further questioning. But.. First of all, wtf is a pot luck dinner, exactly? Second of all, she's not asking me out on a date is she? If it's obviously a date I'll know to tell her I have a boyfriend, but that would be kinda awkard to say if she was just intending to be friends.

    I'll see her again tomorrow at the gym so I'm debating what I need to clear up, or maybe I'll just tell her something came up and I can't go. >_
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    Jan 30, 2010 9:59 PM GMT
    So cute.

    99.5% she asked you on a date... and you said yes.


    And a "pot luck" is where everyone invited brings something to eat -- a "pot", if you will, and both the quality and types of food depends on "luck". Thus "pot luck."

    So next time you see her, you should say:

    You have a boyfriend who's a really good cook (even if this is not true), and ask her advice on what you should bring.

    You will then give her the option of:

    1) Embarrassingly apologizing for not knowing you're gay, and acting all flustered -- at this point, you can offer to back out, if that makes things less awkward.

    2) Excitedly saying "no way! get out!" with a big grin, perhaps realizing she's finally found that hot cute gay friend she's always wanted since first seeing Will & Grace.

    3) Tells you to have your bf bake something, without batting an eye -- in this case, she probably is just glad to bring a good looking guy with her to this thing so she doesn't look so single.

    She likes you, so give her the option of still liking you, even knowing you're already taken, and you're not gonna be her boyfriend.

    Let us know how it goes!
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    Jan 30, 2010 10:05 PM GMT
    A "pot luck" is where everyone prepares a dish that somehow represents the theme of Marijuana.

    -Cookies shaped like pot leaves.
    -Bud Buttered Buttersnaps!
    -Doobie Snacks
    -Magic Pancakes
    -Hash Cream Coffee
    -Butterscotch Space Pops
    -Pot Chocolate (with marshmellows or whipped cream)
    -Moon Muffins
    (If it's more of a cookout/BBQ) - Potdogs.

    Okay, I'm out of weed puns. Sorry.

    Kurt's idea was great. Very good non-confrontational way to tell her "it's not like that".
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    Jan 30, 2010 10:18 PM GMT
    Pot luck dinners can be fun, or terrible when people bring unpopular items, or lots of one thing but not enough of another, like all desserts and no main course. In Minnesota it was always lots of salads made with jello (usually green), and peanut butter blended into every dish you could imagine, totally blech. I often check with the host beforehand to get suggestions.

    But if she thinks you're straight and available, the pot luck dish she wasn't expecting may be you yourself. Good luck...
  • trl_

    Posts: 994

    Jan 30, 2010 10:25 PM GMT
    I'm sure by now someone has explained pot luck to you.

    My advice would just be to go. Who cares. If you suspect her feeling anything romantic wait until after the event and then tell her at the gym (in a sort of socially neutral location) that you're taken....if you feel she suspects a romantic outcome from this.

    Girls find it funny actually if i put it this way "Oh I don't want to confuse you, so I'm just going to let you know that I fly the rainbow flag."

    Then they ask if I have a bf or if I'm going after anyone lol icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jan 31, 2010 5:29 PM GMT
    Oh didn't realize anyone responded. Thanks guys. Quality advice, except that there's no way I'm a good enough liar to tell her that my boyfriend is a good cook. >_<

    Turned out he had off that night anyway so I told her he made plans for us and I couldn't make it. She said she understood and joked that if she had a boyfriend she wouldn't be going to a lame pot luck dinner either. What a relief...