Oh tell me about it.
I'm sort of in the same situation. You just have to realise you won't get what you want from him until he makes the move. As in... if he's gay or just curious (whatever). Therefore the stance you should take is... when he wants to play... go for it - just separate your emotions from your libido (admittedly hard to do).
furthermore... he can figure himself out.... without any help
just ask him: if there was a burning tent and a penis and a vagina in a tent.... which would he save?you win the internet if you get the pop culture ref.