Just need to get a few things off my chest

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    Feb 03, 2010 10:48 PM GMT
    Ok so Im 18. Ive had 1 boy friend and he is the only guy i have ever had sex. I moved from Arizona to Iowa back in august for college and our relationship went bad. He claims I was the one who changed, actually he has been pretty mean about it. And yes, Ive changed but who doesnt when they go to college? He changed too while in college. I dont blame the distance for ruining our relationship like he does. Even when i was at home, we fought every day, and he always had this was of twisting everything so that i would have to be the one trying to make him happy, even if it was me who was having the bad day. So when i left for college things only got worse. Well i broke up with him in October because he had become really clingy. Idk if it was me who was over reacting, but he started to ask me to tell him he was beautiful, and to say sweet nothings all the time. AND I MEAN ALL THE TIME. Ive never been the gooshy type. Ill say i love you but that is about it. Thats the guy he was dating, i didnt feel like i should have to change who i was. He should be with me for me. And eventually i fell out of love and he was not ready. Being selfish, and living for myself i knew that i had to move on to be happy, whether or not that was good for him. In december he started talking to me again. And being really rude about things. Sending me immature text and voicemails of how rude, an asshole and all this other stuff that i am. Am i wrong for living for me? I mean my way of life is make family happy 1st, then me, and then partner, and last is everyone else. Idk. just frustrated with life, and him. I had to block is number just this last week, but it hasnt stopped him from using other peoples phones to harass me
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    Feb 03, 2010 10:55 PM GMT
    You broke up with him, so what do you care? Move on. However, we don't know his side of the story. If the break up was mutual, why is he bothering you still?icon_mad.gif
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    Feb 03, 2010 10:56 PM GMT
    im over him, he just wont leave me alone. He never wanted to break up and he wont move on. idk. i just needed to get it all of my chest
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    Feb 03, 2010 11:03 PM GMT
    Well good luck to you, and don't let him get you down.icon_smile.gif

    Do what you gotta do. Maybe at some point, you can be friends or at least civil towards one another!

    You're just 18, you have a long life of good love ahead of you, you don't need any bullshiticon_neutral.gif
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    Feb 03, 2010 11:04 PM GMT
    thanks
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    Feb 04, 2010 1:10 AM GMT
    No you're not selfish. You're going to change a lot more these 4 years, trust me.

    He's being immature, but it's out of hurt for being dumped by someone he loved. Most likely he will regret later what he's been doing.

    You're also incredibly lucky you got to have a boyfriend while in high school. I'm a little jealous. I didn't come out of the closet until right after my sophomore year of college, and I didn't have my first bf until I was a junior in college. It shows how much society is changing for the better concerning gays. Remember how lucky you are.

    Remember, most people don't marry their first love.

    You need to live for you, and soon enough he will realize that, and that he needs to live for him also.
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    Feb 04, 2010 1:17 AM GMT
    Sounds like you made the right move, but might I suggest that you consider reprioritizing in the future?

    Self
    Partner/Family

    You have to live for yourself...and you have to make sure that you give your partner equal consideration to your family...not one over the other.

    Just my opinion.
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    Feb 04, 2010 8:09 PM GMT
    TheIStrat said


    You're also incredibly lucky you got to have a boyfriend while in high school. I'm a little jealous. I didn't come out of the closet until right after my sophomore year of college, and I didn't have my first bf until I was a junior in college. It shows how much society is changing for the better concerning gays. Remember how lucky you are.



    Well he didnt go to my school so it didnt effect my friends at school. i was out though. and yeah i do consider myself lucky. i had an understanding family, and it only made my friends closer to me. in college though i feel like im back in the closet. and im coming out all over again
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    Feb 04, 2010 8:16 PM GMT
    that sucks, i had a crazy ex that would text my mom to let her know when i was seeing someone else, cause he pretty much stalked me for a couple months after i left him..

    i mean i tried really hard to make it work, but constant text arguments about petty stuff like how i didnt text back enough material was pretty bad. he also used to demand to know what happened to condoms that i would loose or misplace cause i didnt care about them. as well as add all my friends on facebook and talk to them about me constantly.

    lol. you just need to let some people go and not look back, cause even in a relationship you have to worry about you too
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    Feb 05, 2010 5:38 AM GMT
    Progress saidthat sucks, i had a crazy ex that would text my mom to let her know when i was seeing someone else, cause he pretty much stalked me for a couple months after i left him..

    i mean i tried really hard to make it work, but constant text arguments about petty stuff like how i didnt text back enough material was pretty bad. he also used to demand to know what happened to condoms that i would loose or misplace cause i didnt care about them. as well as add all my friends on facebook and talk to them about me constantly.

    lol. you just need to let some people go and not look back, cause even in a relationship you have to worry about you too



    OMG everything (except missing condoms) you have just said is what he did. Like talk to my mom and talk to all of my friends of facebook. and then argue when i didnt text him alot! he adventually just disappear?