Being approached in public places...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 10, 2010 11:48 PM GMT
    Okay I just wanted to know what everyone's opinions on these types of situations are.

    So this was a week before Christmas and I was at the airport and in my terminal waiting for the plane to arrive with a couple of friends. Out of no where, this random guy comes up in front of me, crouches down, and tells me that he saw me checking in and that he wanted to give me his phone number and e-mail address. So he hands me this piece of paper which he clearly just wrote out, and told me to give him a call after Christmas once I got back so that we could go out for coffee or something. So I take the paper and say "sure" and the guy leaves to go catch his flight. Now before I say anything else I will admit that I'm still not comfortable with this whole thing, especially in a public place like the airport where I was sitting with people from my hometown, some of which I even knew. I was pretty embarrassed and freaked out at this point and couldn't believe what had just happened. The thing that bothers me is that he basically followed me down to my terminal to try and give me his number. It just seems kind of creeperish and I'm not sure it was an appropriate time or place to do something like that. Maybe if we were in a gay bar (which I've never gone to) it would be alright, but we weren't. I don't know, maybe I'm just analyzing it too much.

    Once I got home I decided to just laugh about it and the fact that I always get put into these awkward situations and to take it as a compliment. But I still think it was a little creepy lol... So what do you guys think? Am I in the wrong to think that it was kind of inappropriate, or would you guys feel the same way?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 12:02 AM GMT
    Did you call him?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 12:07 AM GMT
    I can see that you might be freaked out about it, especially if you’re not open to and about your sexuality, but I would have defiantly taken it as a complement.
    It makes my heart sing that someone had the balls to it. Maybe things are changing.
    I hope you called him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 12:08 AM GMT
    - I would be really proud that people find me attractive enough to do such thing. Even if im with a friend or 2. Better, it was a guy that found me attractive, awesome! I would definitely turn to my friends and jokingly brag about it (if they've seen us)

    - What i do with the paper is an entirely different story. People can approach to me and try but it UP TO ME to reject or not.

    - With that said, its ur choice to approach ppl in public places or not. You cant really speak for sure. I mean, i dont do it and will never do it like that but thats just me. However, you never know if u actually miss a potential date lol. Anyway, my point is, its highly opinionated whether or not u wanna approach ppl in public place and where u wanna do it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 12:08 AM GMT
    I really don't think it's inappropriate. Unless he made a scene or something, don't judge the guy for taking a chance.

    You're perfectly free to say "oh no thank you, you have the wrong idea." Or something that would save you from your uncomfortable feelings (I assume you're in the closet).

    But, in my opinion, thinking his actions are inappropriate is an example of all that's wrong with our homophobic society.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 12:14 AM GMT
    This has happened to me before, in front of my brother, icon_eek.gif Of course he wanted to know who that was. I just accepted the information and went on with my day. I called the guy up later and met for a drink. His actions were definitely an icebreaker.

    I think the bloke had an opportunity and went with it. He had no way to know the folks around you were known to you. An opportunity missed is well.....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 12:17 AM GMT
    I actually threw it out after it happened, but even if I did keep it I wouldn't have called him anyways. I dunno, I think the reason I felt the way I did was because something like that has never happened to me and caught me way off guard!
    I think I would act differently next time, but it's hard to say haha..

    Yah, I don't know if inappropriate is the right word to use. But i definitely do applaud how brave the guy was to do that.. I definitely would never have the balls to do it!

    Any other thoughts?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 1:30 AM GMT
    Call the guy. Oops, you threw it out.

    Isn't it refreshing that he leads by example and in a world where he's not terrified of his shadow? From where he sits, it's not really brave. It's what people do. The courage thing is in YOUR MIND'S EYE. You're terrified, but, understand, he's NOT.

    He thought you were hot. He liked what he saw. He approached you with decorum and class. Many gay guys would do well to take a lesson from your suitor.

    Being "normal" can be so darned cool.

    I can't believe you were so afraid you pitched his number. Better luck next time.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 1:33 AM GMT
    good lord, do you know, in a few years time, your gonna be on here bitching about how no one ever approaches you... *rolls eyes*

    Can't believe you threw out his number...

    here is hoping no man every approaches you again just because you acted like a dick to someone who had the balls to approach you!
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 11, 2010 1:36 AM GMT
    I might have thought it odd at first, but after some consideration I might credit him with some guts. He took the time and effort.. most wouldn't.

    I think its all in the moment. You saw him, his mannerisms, his approach.
    I think in the end, that would dictate what I'd do.
  • H2Oskier

    Posts: 41

    Feb 11, 2010 1:39 AM GMT
    Would you be interested in the guy if he had approached you differently? If not, all the other details are irrelevant, and it was just unwanted attention. He thought you were worth the risk of humiliation to contact you directly, and is probably feeling pretty stupid for having done that by now. If you don't go to bars, and you feel uncomfortable being approached in public, it sounds like you prefer going the internet route and might be a bit unapproachable in person. Nothing wrong with that, but I think you might miss out on some nicer guys because of it.
    Personally, I'd be very flattered if the guy was cute, and would have forgotten about it by now, if he wasn't.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 1:41 AM GMT
    I wish I had that guy's gaydar.
  • docbailey2005

    Posts: 362

    Feb 11, 2010 1:42 AM GMT
    Take that as a total compliment and call him. then again i can see that happening to you often. You're pretty attractive young fella.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 1:43 AM GMT
    Straight guys approach women all time in grocery stores, the mall, or airports and strike up a conversation and hand out their phone numbers, So why should it be any different for us gay guys? It think it should have been kind of refreshing for you to have met someone somewhere else besides a party, a nightclub, or the internet.
  • thatonedude21

    Posts: 223

    Feb 11, 2010 1:48 AM GMT
    Beaux saidI wish I had that guy's gaydar.

    Quoted for extreme emphasis... LOL.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 1:51 AM GMT
    Beaux saidI wish I had that guy's gaydar.


    For real to your comment. Thats some serious gaydar going on.

    The closest thing to this that ever happened to me was a few years back some guy sent his hag over to me to first find out a bit about me on his behalf while he stood in the distance grinning LOL I thought it was adorable as fuck.
  • H2Oskier

    Posts: 41

    Feb 11, 2010 2:00 AM GMT
    I should have read your profile before I posted. You describe yourself as paranoid, closeted, and never having been with another guy. I was there too, at one time, but living in a tolerant city like Toronto, you'll probably grow out of it quicker than I did. Follow your heart, but don't let life pass you by for the sake of what other people think. Believe me, guys like the one you met at the airport, are not all that common.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:05 AM GMT
    I don't care how a guy approaches me as long as he does.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:06 AM GMT
    It is refreshing that people still do that. But I could see how the other person could be in shock. Not many people are brave enough for such a forward move.

    Out of curiosity, was he older? good looking? details!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:07 AM GMT
    thatonedude21 said
    Beaux saidI wish I had that guy's gaydar.

    Quoted for extreme emphasis... LOL.


    I bet Mike355's rainbow-striped pants and jelly shoes gave him away.

    In all seriousness, I can see how it caught you (Mike355) off guard because the man didn't hide himself or his attraction in public like so many of us do.

    Many of us wait until we're in safe places like gay bars or airport bathroom stalls to send out the homo vibes.

    This guy should be applauded and you should feel pretty damn cool that someone approached you, even if it was a little uncomfortable.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:08 AM GMT
    When someone runs up to you while jogging and your @ ASU and asks if they can suck your cock...you gotta wonder!!icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:20 AM GMT
    mystic_man saidWhen someone runs up to you while jogging and your @ ASU and asks if they can suck your cock...you gotta wonder!!icon_eek.gif


    Yeah, sorry about that. Totally out of character for me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:22 AM GMT
    I love when things like that happens to me....!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:24 AM GMT
    mystic_man saidWhen someone runs up to you while jogging and your @ ASU and asks if they can suck your cock...you gotta wonder!!icon_eek.gif



    Yeah, I don't gotta wonder...put some clothes on
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 11, 2010 2:29 AM GMT
    I'm usually very approachable. I don't know why, but people just start talking to me out of no where, but just, not in this context. Anyways I guess I'm just not used to this kind of attention... Fuck now I feel like shit haha! At least I was nice to the guy! Next time, if there even is a next time, I'll probably act differently. But I think this one guy in particular had a specific demeanour to him that I just didn't like.