Well, we thought we'd say good-bye before we leave.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 4:00 PM GMT

    UPDATE EDIT FEB18th - We're staying at the request of roughly 75 people.

    Below is our original post:

    We'll keep our profile up for another day or so for anyone that wants to email us.


    While it's been great at times on here, it's also been horrible on here.

    When we arrived, we were met with some friendship but a lot of indifference. When we divulged what had happened to us, many didn't want to know, and some decided to twist it into a slur on us.
    There's no way we can fight that.
    We are two pretty gentle guys, and someone we highly respect told us yesterday something that inferred we now sound like one of the people that go after us on a regular basis. This told us a lot; that in order to make it here, we are becoming something that we're not. Mean.
    We've heard many complaints about our supposedly saccharine sweet phoniness. Well, it's not phony by any remote stretch. How do you think we have the relationship we do, for this length of time?

    A moment of truth came last night when we read a post by a drunk 21year old. Out of the mouth of babes, eh? lol.

    He said that RJ is a circus of human misery. He was referring to the posts he sees. Topics consistently devolving into mud slinging caused by extremely bigoted opinions. Bigoted opinions are referred to as 'shit and giggles' .

    We're guilty of taking people on here seriously.

    We watched the lynch mob (and even joined in) take out G_Force as management will not moderate. The wound to us for having done that is deep and won't go away. We know why we did it, but it shouldn't be up to members to become vigilante groups performing public lynchings.


    So, a song to finish up, and thanks to all those kind enough to buddy-list us, consider boring old us as Realjock men of the year on that topic around Xmastime, and all that.




    Fly silly seabird
    No dreams can possess you
    No voices can blame you
    For sun on your wings
    My gentle relations
    Have names they must call me
    For loving the freedom
    Of all flying things
    My dreams with the seagulls fly
    Out of reach out of cry

    I came to the city
    And lived like old Crusoe
    On an island of noise
    In a cobblestone sea
    And the beaches were concrete
    And the stars paid a light bill
    And the blossoms hung false
    On their store window trees
    My dreams with the seagulls fly
    Out of reach out of cry

    Out of the city
    And down to the seaside
    To sun on my shoulders
    And wind in my hair
    But sandcastles crumble
    And hunger is human
    And humans are hungry
    For worlds they can't share
    My dreams with the seagulls fly
    Out of reach out of cry

    I call to a seagull
    Who dives to the waters
    And catches his silver-fine
    Dinner alone
    Crying where are the footprints
    That danced on these beaches
    And the hands that cast wishes
    That sunk like a stone
    My dreams with the seagulls fly
    Out of reach Out of cry

    thanks Joni Mitchell!


    respectfully and regretfully, Doug and Bill of meninlove





    We don't know yet how to email our our buddies at once with contact info, but we'll find out and do it. Failing that, we'll ask a friend to field messages for us after we close our account.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 4:49 PM GMT
    Alas, this is the new normal. Unfortunately as it is in life, so it probably goes on RJ:

    Mob: 1
    Good Guys: 0
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 5:05 PM GMT
    Just a thought... instead of deleting your account, how about just not visiting the forums. That way, you can keep in touch with the people like me you've enjoyed talking to while avoiding all the crap that's driving you away.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 5:35 PM GMT
    And a song for you.

    Kind of worn around the edges. Still magical, though.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 5:44 PM GMT
    Well, I commented in another thread that we should just ignore the people who just try to run you down. Leaving the site will only make it worse for the rest of us, and it is kind of like admitting defeat...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 5:44 PM GMT
    Hey meninlove,

    its ok, you can forgive yourself for getting sucked into a mob mentality. Sometimes it happens to the best of us. Although I'm not aware of what may have happened (or a culination of events) that caused you guys to want to say bye bye, but at least you have the integrity to acknowledge your mistakes.

    Let's face it though...........you guys exude a rare level of confidence and kindness and nowdays, a lot of people feel uncomfortable with that and only know how to ridicule those strengths. Two men being in love on many levels is a concept that some guys can't handle...maybe they are envious about your happness or clueless on what it means.

    I've deleated my profile before in disgust at the astronomical level of ignorance and bitchness displayed here by some members who actually think they are enlightened and fair. But I've returned because I realized that I was giving too much importance to the bad apples and the good apples were to important to loose contact with These are the REAl men, the REALjocks, the epitome of masculinity. Some guys just write and talk about it. You guys live it.

    There really is a wonderful sense of freedom when you learn from your mistakes and in this case, effectively ignore the insignificant "dust" written by some members who apparently are not happy and are the personification of being gay, lonely. angry and lost. Let them stew in their own misery. Fuck em. I have to admit I get a warped sense of satisfaction and validation when they do.

    I post a lot less than I used too and hardly ever start a topic anymore cause most of the topics now don't interest me or are written by guys who seem to enjoy nonsense and stupidity but sometimes a good topic comes along that is really fun or informative.

    Anyway, we've enjoyed talking before and we have each other's phone numbers. Don't be strangers. You guys can blow sunshine and happiness up my ass anytime. Let the rest of em get their inspiration and happiness from a bar, a dark backroom, their own internalized hateful homophobias, the hottest pornstars or from their scared little bigoted closets.icon_biggrin.gif

    KEEP IN TOUCH!
    Thomas
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:03 PM GMT
    You both will be sorely missed by many!!! I'm so fortunate to have met you before you left and I am so touched by the kind words you gave me regarding Long Distance Relationships.

    It's a sad, sad day when men of our orientation lash out at others, just to justify their own pitiful existence.

    Thanks for touching my heart... may you live long and prosper!!
    We'll be in touch in our own secret way...
    icon_sad.gif
    Until then... bless both of you for the joy you have brought to many!!!
    David
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:07 PM GMT
    funny-picture-goodbye-cruel-world.jpg
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Feb 16, 2010 6:09 PM GMT
    I don't think leaving the site is all that healthy just because you are second guessing some of your recent actions. Take a break, reevaluate your intentions and see if you are still being true to yourself(which I'm sure you are). It is ok to consider each individual here seriously, but what we spout and sputter in the middle of the night might just be off the top of our head ramblings that we wouldn't normally say or think in the light of day. Blame it on too many buttered turnips that night.

    The wind blows in different directions, you would know that if you were a pirate. icon_wink.gif If the wind isn't blowing in your direction for awhile pull down your sails and wait for a better day when the wind is blowing against your back.

    Ahoy mateys!

  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 16, 2010 6:09 PM GMT
    WHAT???

    Very, very sorry to hear that you both are opting to leave. A significant
    asset to this site, I hope you reconsider. You know your a part of those I trust and admire here. Please do give it some thought and don't go!

    Chris

    icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:13 PM GMT
    If there's one thing I've learned for my short time on RJ, it's that it is just as raw as real life. There are good people and bad people. That's true in families, in social circles, in work environments, with perfect strangers. I'm afraid that this site, as with many other forums out there, is a microcosm of the greater world. I was bruised a few times early on, still am from time to time, but I don't take it too seriously. I jump into some discussions that are interesting, and avoid the train wrecks.

    Maybe it's too much work, especially if you've been on here for as long as Doug and Bill have. But take this site and the people on it for what they are worth -- there is the same percentage of assholes here as there is out on the streets, or in bars, or in the office. It's virtually impossible to avoid them, we just learn to deal with them.

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    Feb 16, 2010 6:19 PM GMT
    For the hundreth time, this is why we need moderators.
  • inuman

    Posts: 733

    Feb 16, 2010 6:19 PM GMT
    Aww I liked them too. Gonna miss the way they thought and looked at things.

    Alas as I told my buddy who got outed by his parents computer that "its not the end of the world, the world will not stop because of your sorrows, it will still move forward, time won't stop so you can heal your wounds, nor will anyone causing the wounds to you. Be strong and remember that life still goes on."

    Good bye guys I enjoyed the insight you brought with you and the way you both looked at this. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:22 PM GMT
    I'm leaving too. No, no, don't try to stop me. Praying won't help you, crying won't do you no good. I've had enough. I can't take any more. I have too many self-doubts. I'm tired of the ugliness. It's just ugliness after ugliness here and there is never any cheer. It's like the 9th circle of hell here. Ok, I'm going now, bye, see ya, ciao, I won't be back. You won't have McGay to kick around anymore. I am not a crook. I'm leaving, adios, farewell, toodlepip and tata. Keep your evil ugliness for yourself. I'm off for some overdue introspection. I need to know if I'm a bad man and only I can find out for myself. No, no. Don't try to convince me I'm a bad man. Your words have no power here, now be gone before someone drops a house on you. I'm leaving. One day I'll be dead and then you'll be sorry. I'll never smile at you again. I'm taking off now, bye, no, no, don't try to stop me, it's for the best. It might hurt a little at first but you'll find another McGay. I'm a dime a dozen, so, please, please, please, don't try to stop me. It's just no good anymore since you went away, number one. I'm worth a million in prizes, but nobody deserves that much in prizes, especially all you self-loathiing, internally homophobic muscle marys. So, really, I don't care how much you cry, I will not change my mind. Not now. not ever. I'm leaving now, so, goodbye, au revoir, hasta luega, in awhile crocodile. The world is too cruel, I cannot be part of it any longer, so, no, please please please don't try to stop me, bye now, ciao ciao, sayonara. This has been McGay, over and out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:24 PM GMT
    Ok, ok, you've convinced me to stay, but only if everyone is nice to each other from now on. I mean. Don't make me cut a bitch. Don't make me take off my belt. Don't make me give you away to parents who don't love their children. Don't make me send you to a farm where you can run in the fields and play all day long and not have to eat the living room furniture, yeah, you Snoopy, you!
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Feb 16, 2010 6:27 PM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidFor the hundreth time, this is why we need moderators.


    True. It really is anarchy out here sometimes. I don't even have enough courage to read another post about politics or religion any more.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:27 PM GMT
    I would agree with what a lot of the guys on here have said. Ignore the nasty guys, they're not worth worrying about.

    Hope you come back to RJ soon.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:27 PM GMT
    Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are deleted.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:28 PM GMT
    The nicest guys on this entire site. Along with many other very fine men whom I admire.

    Everyone do what you can to dissuade them from leaving. RJ will not be the same without them. Their departure is not a good omen for this site. icon_sad.gif
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Feb 16, 2010 6:28 PM GMT
    McGay saidOk, ok, you've convinced me to stay, but only if everyone is nice to each other from now on. I mean. Don't make me cut a bitch. Don't make me take off my belt. Don't make me give you away to parents who don't love their children. Don't make me send you to a farm where you can run in the fields and play all day long and not have to eat the living room furniture, yeah, you Snoopy, you!


    I was holding the door open just to be polite, I really wasn't trying to rush you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:28 PM GMT
    Shut the fuck up McGayicon_mad.gificon_neutral.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:29 PM GMT
    meninlove said We watched the lynch mob (and even joined in) take out G_Force as management will not moderate. The wound to us for having done that is deep and won't go away. We know why we did it, but it shouldn't be up to members to become vigilante groups performing public lynchings.


    Well this is one of the REAL weaknesses of RJ. It is not your fault. They should have booted G_farce a long time back on the grounds that his confused, self-hating evangelicalism (which saw homosexuality as a sin which deserved condemnation by an angry god) was profoundly unhelpful to young guys from conservative backgrounds who were trying to come to terms with their sexuality. (He was also fucking annoying.)

    I frankly do not understand why they refuse to moderate a *little* more (the "free speach defense" is a load of toilet paper: suitable only to be shat upon and flushed away).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:29 PM GMT
    KissingPro saidShut the fuck up McGayicon_mad.gificon_neutral.gif



    See? This is why people leave. Ugliness, ugliness, ugliness. Instead of responding in kind to your horrible ugly suggestion, I'm going to pray for you.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:31 PM GMT
    I'm not sure what happened to cause this, but I am very sorry to see you guys go.

    I hope maybe you'll reconsider.

    Just so you'll know, I've always liked, admired and appreciated your posts. I always found them to be positive, uplifting and filled with wisdom.

    (I also appreciate your kind remarks about my TV docs! So glad you liked 'em!)

    I don't know if you're on Facebook or not, but seriously. . . if you're really burned out on RJ, you might try that. In fact, I urge you to give that a shot.

    I've been on FB for several months and like it very much. It's positive and friendly (one of the reasons I like it so much) and you can join literally thousands of FB groups that cover virtually any topic.

    That said, I hope you guys stay here. Maybe just take a brief vacation from it.

    Whatever you decide, best of luck always! I think you're both great!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2010 6:33 PM GMT
    Ugliness? Wait till you throw some holy water on me and my head starts to spin and I throw up pea soup.