That "other" guy at the gym

  • Moishendlishu...

    Posts: 435

    Feb 26, 2010 6:24 AM GMT
    So tonight I was at the gym just working out, doing my thing. A guy comes in and starts working out. He then proceeds to harrass nearly every person in between sets. Now I'm a social person, but this was excessive. He talked to basically everyone while they were working out. A few people brushed him off and a few appeased him, but you could tell no one really wanted to talk to him. He didn't come near me though, I was prob sending out the stay the fuck away from me vibe, because dude was getting on my nerves.

    Has this ever happened to you? Are you someone who works out and stays focused and does their own thing, or are you more social when you are at the gym?
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    Feb 26, 2010 2:46 PM GMT
    I'm antisocial at the gym. It's my time to disengage, focus and think, so it bothers me when people try to get up in my face. I don't mind trading tips or techniques -- in fact, I welcome that sort of thing.

    However, I've had some people try to start up small talk between -- or even during -- sets and that really bothers me. I'm always polite, but I never let it get out of hand.

    One key technique for avoiding this sort of thing is to use earphones. If I'm feeling particularly antisocial one day, I'll put in my earbuds -- even if they are not turned on. It keeps people at bay.

    It's like my own personal "do not disturb" sign.
  • WILDCARD73

    Posts: 545

    Feb 26, 2010 2:48 PM GMT
    the use of ipod
    makes less people come to talk to you

    i like to get in work out and get out

    it gym time
  • fitnfunmich

    Posts: 181

    Feb 26, 2010 2:56 PM GMT
    Thank God I haven't run into that particular guy! (Check out my recent post on another "that guy" at the gym.)

    Anyway a few thoughts: we're always going to come across people who do or say things that are inappropriate, and when it happens you have two options. You can either ignore them, which is often easier, or you can confront them, which is often more satisfying. icon_biggrin.gif

    In this case it really sounds like the guy has a mental problem so I would advise you to pretend you don't hear him if it happens again. (Crazy people, like wild animals and ex wives, are unpredictable so best avoided if at all possible.)
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    Feb 26, 2010 4:52 PM GMT
    Moishendlishus saidSo tonight I was at the gym just working out, doing my thing. A guy comes in and starts working out. He then proceeds to harrass nearly every person in between sets. Now I'm a social person, but this was excessive. He talked to basically everyone while they were working out. A few people brushed him off and a few appeased him, but you could tell no one really wanted to talk to him. He didn't come near me though, I was prob sending out the stay the fuck away from me vibe, because dude was getting on my nerves.

    Has this ever happened to you? Are you someone who works out and stays focused and does their own thing, or are you more social when you are at the gym?


    Clearly not England then. Just looking someone directly in the eye is considered a bit wierd, lol. (OK I am exaggerating a tiny bit.)
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    Feb 26, 2010 4:59 PM GMT
    Moishendlishus said...A guy comes in and starts working out. He then proceeds to harrass nearly every person in between sets...

    How do you define "harass?" Did he just want to talk, or was he abusive? I realize even ordinary friendly conversation from a stranger can be unwelcome, when someone is focused on their task at hand and it causes a distraction.

    But to better answer your question, what exactly was this guy doing?
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 26, 2010 5:03 PM GMT
    I know we've talked about this off and on on RJ.

    I tend to be very focused and don't really "see" other things too much since I'm in my zone, but there are some exceptions.

    We have a "right wing" fanatic, his name is Kevin and he's always talking to almost anyone who will listen to him denounce the democrats as commies
    or socialists. He and I actually get along, but I hate it when he's in one of his moments and there he is carrying on with somebody (and you can tell they want to get away). When I don't want to talk, I never notice him in the room (on purpose). I've heard about a dozen people carry on about "this nut". Kind of unfortunate. He lost his job and his wife recently and of course it's all so unfair...............
  • jingold04

    Posts: 122

    Feb 26, 2010 5:04 PM GMT
    I'm at a small town gym,so if you don't at least say "hello" people get the impression you're mean. I'm also the only homo (LOL!! the only one that knows it,anyway!!!) so I feel like I'm representing every other Mo on earth,so I try to give a "friendly but focused" vibe. The earbuds do tend to keep the Chatty Cathy's at bay.
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    Feb 26, 2010 5:04 PM GMT
    Brit_Bloke saidClearly not England then. Just looking someone directly in the eye is considered a bit wierd, lol. (OK I am exaggerating a tiny bit.)

    I grew up in the New York City area, where eye contact is often avoided, I think for reasons of safety & fear. A bad habit I acquired in my youth, that I always have to consciously overcome. Otherwise, people from other parts of the US consider me to be "shifty-eyed" and unfriendly, and don't trust what I'm saying.
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    Feb 26, 2010 6:50 PM GMT
    Red_Vespa said
    Brit_Bloke saidClearly not England then. Just looking someone directly in the eye is considered a bit wierd, lol. (OK I am exaggerating a tiny bit.)

    I grew up in the New York City area, where eye contact is often avoided, I think for reasons of safety & fear. A bad habit I acquired in my youth, that I always have to consciously overcome. Otherwise, people from other parts of the US consider me to be "shifty-eyed" and unfriendly, and don't trust what I'm saying.


    For us it's just a natural reservation/good manners thing. People on a crowded Tube literally strive to avoid eye contact.

    On the topic of safety and fear, you reminded me of a funny incident that happened to me last summer. I was coming home a bit drunk after a night out with workmates and was eyeing up (obviously too blatantly) a pretty hot dark/latin looking guy.

    He approached me and asked "What's your problem mate? Do you wanna check in my bag? Do ya? Do ya?"

    He was clearly (or had been mistaken for) a muslim. Kinda felt for him, despite his aggression. He probably has experienced shifty looks before. Terrible to admit, but even I can't help getting a little nervous when a woman in a berka gets on.
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    Feb 26, 2010 7:41 PM GMT
    Moishendlishus saidSo tonight I was at the gym just working out, doing my thing. A guy comes in and starts working out. He then proceeds to harrass nearly every person in between sets. Now I'm a social person, but this was excessive. He talked to basically everyone while they were working out. A few people brushed him off and a few appeased him, but you could tell no one really wanted to talk to him. He didn't come near me though, I was prob sending out the stay the fuck away from me vibe, because dude was getting on my nerves.

    Has this ever happened to you? Are you someone who works out and stays focused and does their own thing, or are you more social when you are at the gym?

    I'm sure if he was "hot", people wouldn't mind his interruptions. icon_lol.gificon_rolleyes.gif

    I don't mind a little social interaction in between sets. But nothing excessive. Personally, I leave people alone and rarely initiate idle conversation. I just assume people are there to workout, and not socialize.
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    Feb 26, 2010 7:54 PM GMT
    HA! we have a dude like that at my gym.

    we call him Crazy Rick. he cannot get the message that the conversation is over, nevermind the fact that he's loud and fully obnoxious and always wants to discuss things other people dont want to discuss...like politics (he HATES liberals), or religion (everyone but Catholics are going to hell), or sex (he scored some MILF pussy last night)...

    and he's a HUGE Cowboys fan...which is how I finally got rid of him.

    after a particularly long tirade about how he wished Tom Brady was dead, he asked me if I saw the Cowboys game the night before. I said "No, I don't watch basketball."

    He turned around and left me alone...hasn't bothered me since.

    My workout partner insists I'm a genius, lol

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    Feb 26, 2010 8:18 PM GMT
    I will never go up and start talking to random people because I assume, they are just there to work out, but if someone comes up to me, I don't mind talking.

    Even if I know the person, I won't go up and talk to them, maybe smile and wave from across the room ha, but then again sometimes I think I should because they might think that I don't want to talk to them? Ugh... I don't know.
  • Joeyphx444

    Posts: 2382

    Feb 26, 2010 8:22 PM GMT
    There are some black guys that come into the gym and one guy in the group is annoying as hell. I mean, he screams when the other guy is right next to him. He was talking for so long one time that I finished 3 sets of something. I hate this b/c it takes forever if you want to use something that he is using or may be using, you can't even tell what he's doing.

    Then he does that shit where someone does one set and goes to another machine and then comes back after while. I guess you could call it hogging. Let's not even get into the things they talk about icon_razz.gif
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    Feb 26, 2010 8:47 PM GMT
    There is a guy at my gym who is annoying, although he is good looking. Problem is this - he constantly chats it up with people correcting everything they are doing. He seems to want to be the man who knows it all. Most of his banter is bullshit. I give him the full attention he deserves! He knows enough to stay away.
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    Feb 26, 2010 9:04 PM GMT
    Every gym seems to have "that guy." When I realized there were about 4 or 5 guys that irritated the heck out of me, I figured maybe I'm the one being a bit too uptight. Sure, the one who likes to do yoga poses for 40 minutes at the entrance of the gym since that's where there is more open space needs that room to adequately walk the downward dog. And the guy who wants to stretch all the time, even when you're sitting in the crowded hot tub might really need to keep his muscles limber. And the Fester look-a-like who belts along with his ipod just might not understand noise pollution is distracting. And the hairy no-care bear who simply must growl with every rep just might burst if he doesn't release that gurl power.

    We're all weird in one way or another. Some just let their freak flag fly a little higher.
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    Feb 26, 2010 9:33 PM GMT
    I'm way chatty... *shit* I'm probably "that guy"... shoot me now.
  • Leawoody

    Posts: 48

    Feb 26, 2010 10:14 PM GMT
    I call those EGR's for Extra Grace Required. There is one in every group. If you can't pinpoint who the EGR person is, then it's likely you, LOL.

    I'm heads down and focused at the gym and don't really want to talk to anyone, but a number of people in my business network, including some clients, go to the same gym. I obviously acknowledge them, but keep any conversation very short assuming they're on a time/routine schedule as well.

    However, there is a group of mostly older men that get in the locker room and have very loud, very obnoxious conversations, which echo all over the place because of the tile. They take their sweet time and just follow each other in the showers, the sinks and lockers. I don't mind their conversation, I just wish they'd keep it at a reasonable decibel level. They often use up all my EGR points for the entire day.