Bringing heteros to a gay bar?

  • DrobUA

    Posts: 1331

    Mar 14, 2010 8:30 AM GMT
    Here's the deal. All my buddies are now extremely comfortable with my sexuality. I mean they always acted like they were but now that a little time has gone on they've become comfortable enough to bring up topics that were kind of danced around for a while. Things like what I've done sexually and if I'm dating someone ect. I myself have never been to pride or a gay bar or anything like that but now I'm kinda thinking about checking it out. The dilemma is that all my friends are breeders. Is it frowned upon to bring them to gay bars? I just saw a thread about a guy that is just coming out and having some problems with gay guys thinking he's straight and being mad that he was in a gay bar.

    Good idea? Bad idea?
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    Mar 14, 2010 8:54 AM GMT
    I've taken mates with me to gay bars (all mine are straight) and it's gone down well, my mates are incredibly comfortable and confident about who they are sexually so they aren't at all phased about homosexuality.

    When they've come with me they sorta blend in in a sort of "This is all new and interesting" kinda way and are just having fun and all smiles, I've had to run interception for'em a few times, while they are all fine with gently letting a guy down they sorta become bewildered when a guy just throws himself at'em or comes on incredibly strong..

    Although they've had a few questionable things happen in a negative way they have been really good about it and most other people have been fine with having a few straight people there with me and when they were single they had a smorgasbord of straight attractive hags to have some fun with haha
  • DrobUA

    Posts: 1331

    Mar 14, 2010 8:56 AM GMT
    Ahh a fag hag buffet.. I didn't even think of that.
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    Mar 14, 2010 9:28 AM GMT
    i bring my hetero-homies to gay bars once or twice. after a couple of drinks, it really didn't matter were they were at, they all had a good time.icon_lol.gif

    I say bring your heteros to that gay bar.
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    Mar 14, 2010 12:41 PM GMT
    last time I looked around it was still America....you should feel free to bring them to a gay bar....just warn that not everyone's going to realize they're straight......
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    Mar 14, 2010 3:56 PM GMT
    Dewd. Ok. Maybe I'm outta line and a bit jaded. But you're so gosh darn cute, so here's my two cents. Gay bars (bars in general, really) are like people; each one has its own personality (and personality disorders.)

    You might want to get some time on the clock and check out the scene before you plop down at a table with your closest friends, basking in the pleasure of their company, in an environment custom made for all things gay. It could either be really exiting and good times had by all, or like throwing a six week old puppy covered in pig's blood to a pack of wolves. Know the territory first.

    ...you've still got that new-car smell...don't rush and 411 everything...icon_wink.gif
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    Mar 14, 2010 4:10 PM GMT
    Don't know where you're from and what US gay bars are like in general, but, as a rule, no worries, they'll probably have a laff.

    The caveat is, there are certain gay bars in London I would NEVER take a straight friend to. And the female ones wouldn't be allowed in anyway.

    OK I have some lezzy friends who might be able to scam their way in, but definitely none of my hetero female fri3ends.

    PC People: that last ine was a JOKE!!!! Dyke is indeed a bad word and Jesus/Mohammed/Jehova,etc loves us all, and we're not poofs, we're homosexuals and God's children.

    In with anger out with love.

    Speaking of which, off topic, do you REALLY have shit like this on US TV?

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    Mar 14, 2010 4:11 PM GMT

    Anytime I took my straight friends to clubs I always had a little conversation with them first about the frustrations of being a minority (gay) and going to a club only to hit on a straight guy and have him get miffed (aka pissed off).

    "Remember they have no way of knowing you're straight, unless you wear a sign. You're in their hang-out"

    "Take it as a huge compliment; gay guys have pretty high standards."

    "Don't insult them, gay life is tough enough already, and talking to a stranger isn't easy."

    Out of about a dozen friends (that wanted to go with me) over the years, three then backed out and did something else. icon_wink.gif


    -Doug

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    Mar 14, 2010 4:18 PM GMT
    reGenr8 saidDewd. Ok. Maybe I'm outta line and a bit jaded. But you're so gosh darn cute, so here's my two cents. Gay bars (bars in general, really) are like people; each one has its own personality (and personality disorders.)

    You might want to get some time on the clock and check out the scene before you plop down at a table with your closest friends, basking in the pleasure of their company, in an environment custom made for all things gay. It could either be really exiting and good times had by all, or like throwing a six week old puppy covered in pig's blood to a pack of wolves. Know the territory first.

    ...you've still got that new-car smell...don't rush and 411 everything...icon_wink.gif


    NO DOUBT GOOD ADVICE!!

    Disaster:
    I once took a recommendation from a gay friend (when I was young and fresh and new) to watch the MUST SEE HILARITY of John Water's Pink Flamingo's, so I did. You see my mother and I share an interest in movies. But this is not a movie you want to see with your mother!
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    Mar 14, 2010 4:30 PM GMT
    Brit_Bloke saidDon't know where you're from and what US gay bars are like in general, but, as a rule, no worries, they'll probably have a laff.

    The caveat is, there are certain gay bars in London I would NEVER take a straight friend to. And the female ones wouldn't be allowed in anyway.

    OK I have some lezzy friends who might be able to scam their way in, but definitely none of my hetero female fri3ends.

    PC People: that last ine was a JOKE!!!! Dyke is indeed a bad word and Jesus/Mohammed/Jehova,etc loves us all, and we're not poofs, we're homosexuals and God's children.

    In with anger out with love.

    Speaking of which, off topic, do you REALLY have shit like this on US TV?

    (deleted vid)


    I'm not a moderator, but with all due respect, shouldn't this be its own thread? (May Dawkins forgive you....)
  • rnch

    Posts: 11526

    Mar 14, 2010 4:30 PM GMT
    here in new orleans, the "gay" bars are frequented by BOTH sides of the pasture. icon_cool.gif
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    Mar 14, 2010 4:37 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]

    Speaking of which, off topic, do you REALLY have shit like this on US TV?

    [/quote]

    NO. Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, Oral Roberts, Billy Graham, and so are are NOTHING like that.
















    They're worse.

    To answer to OP, I think you will be fine but just know that you will get hit on. You may even get your asses grabbed. If you have an even number of straight friends, they could always be "partnered" so as to avoid comlications later on. I have a straight friend who loved to go to the gay bars and dance. I would be his bf that night and worked like a charm.
    Good luck and have fun.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Mar 14, 2010 4:53 PM GMT
    For me .... it's not a good idea

    When you take str8 guys to a Gay Bar
    then you have to feel like their protector icon_neutral.gif
    and the otherside of the coin ... you have to be responsible for Their behavior

    And Guys ... I don't want to go into a Gay Bar myself and have to worry that the cute guy I see by the bar is actually a Str8 guy icon_rolleyes.gifGeesh
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    Mar 14, 2010 4:57 PM GMT
    When I first came out, I my straight friends (male and female) went with me to gay clubs a few times for moral support. I think it helped me feel more comfortable having a group of people I knew with me, rather than going solo. If your friends are up for it, I say take them with you.
  • Mikeylikesit

    Posts: 1021

    Mar 14, 2010 4:58 PM GMT
    I really do not see the logic behind bringing str8 guys to a gay bar...
    icon_neutral.gificon_rolleyes.gificon_eek.gif
  • swimmerdude52...

    Posts: 119

    Mar 14, 2010 5:00 PM GMT
    DrobUA saidAhh a fag hag buffet.. I didn't even think of that.


    ok first off, i dont know if it is bc i am new but am loving the terms you have

    "breeders" "Fag Hag" lmao

    second, if they are down for it then heck yes bring em. I encourage you to have pre game talk with them of course. let them know not to overreact to anything.

    I know i am bringing my close straight friends to a gay bar for my 21st...and they are actually excited to go
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    Mar 14, 2010 5:27 PM GMT
    Yous should be able to go wherever you want. Don't worry what other people think. If it is a place you like go. If you think your friends like it take them to. I think the notion that gay guys freak out around straight people in gay bars is kinda overblown .. I've never seen that happen. Gay guys would be happy if you bring cute straight guys to a bar icon_lol.gif

    I would just scout places out first to see if it is a place you like. I am partial to places with dart boards because I don't really drink much icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 14, 2010 5:27 PM GMT
    I went on a Moustache March this Friday (see picture) to a gay bar with a bunch of straight friends, and aside from the guys saying disparaging things like "fag joint" and other remarks about going to the urinals alone, of which I verbally reprimanded them, it was quite alright.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 14, 2010 5:58 PM GMT
    Well depending on how comfortable they are. I mean, I was forced by my hetero guy friends to go to a gay bar because they thought it would be fun. It ended up to be a blast and a hilarious night. You'll never know until you try.
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    Mar 14, 2010 6:03 PM GMT
    some guys love the attention, even though they're straight its still flattering if a hot/cute gay dude finds them hot.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 14, 2010 6:04 PM GMT
    makavelli said other remarks about going to the urinals alone, of which I verbally reprimanded them, it was quite alright.


    I hope your reprimand included the words "rape" "virgin" and "ass" in close proximity. icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Mar 14, 2010 6:22 PM GMT
    charlitos saidsome guys love the attention, even though they're straight its still flattering if a hot/cute gay dude finds them hot.


    ...speaking of Hot...mind if I stalk you...?!?icon_lol.gif <...sigh...>
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    Mar 14, 2010 6:23 PM GMT
    reGenr8 said
    charlitos saidsome guys love the attention, even though they're straight its still flattering if a hot/cute gay dude finds them hot.


    ...speaking of Hot...mind if I stalk you...?!?icon_lol.gif <...sigh...>



    He´s mine icon_twisted.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 14, 2010 6:39 PM GMT
    I think if your straight friends are Ok with going to a gay bar with you and will behave themselves, that should be all that matter. If gay people can attend straight venues, why not the opposite.
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    Mar 14, 2010 7:10 PM GMT
    I think it's awesome if you have some buds that want to go.

    I've been twice, and the second time I took a straight buddy who admitted he had a good time (he didn't mind guys buying him drinks either, turns out they thought he was the gay one..)

    But maybe keep them on a leash a bit, I caught my bud saying "fag" a couple of times and making weird faces at dudes touching each other.

    So go out, have a good time, and it's awesome you have a support system that's open to the idea.