Is being SELFISH a crime?

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    Mar 21, 2010 11:00 PM GMT
    1.Concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others

    2. Arising from concern with one's own welfare or advantage in disregard of others

    Over the years, I've put everyone else's needs & feelings before my own and I've realised one thing: they're never going to be satisfied & I get the short end of the stick. I've also looked at all of the losers, users, game players & dickweeds I've encountered over the years & realised that it's time to start being SELFISH & looking out for numero uno: ME. I just made a point to no longer be anyone's doormat or be walked all over or take anyone else's feelings into consideration. I've even made a point rather clear to a lot of people when drama gets started and it gets squashed in the same sitting: Either you like me or you don't, there is no middle ground about me.

    So do I think being selfish is a crime? No it isn't. When you think about it, you've got people who will lie to you before they ever tell the truth because they think it's going to dig them out of a hole. In fact, it does nothing more than dig you into a deeper hole.

    When it comes right down to it, I would rather be a selfish bastard rather than be a 2-timing manwhore, period. I know that I will never be satisfied because I'm human just like everyone else, I just happen to be someone who thinks of no one but himself. I'm good to kids & the elderly, and will put them first but as far as adults are concerned..don't expect a handout from me. I've laid my reputation on the line for people who have needed a paycheck and they have showed that their performance, period, is poor.

    So, I've decided no more of putting my reputation on the line for anyone else, no more shelling out money to help folks, no more pleasing everyone else but myself.

    So all in all, I am officially selfish...Is it a crime? The reason I ask is because when it's said and done, you're never going to please everyone around you and you're never going to be satisfied, yourself. The only person who can please you is the person who looks back at you in the mirror in the morning.

    Granted, I am officially selfish...Is it a crime?
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    Mar 21, 2010 11:05 PM GMT
    Not a crime...just immature. You haven't grown up yet...AT 28!!!

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    Mar 21, 2010 11:11 PM GMT
    BadByMyself saidGranted, I am officially selfish...Is it a crime?

    Not necessarily, if your experience has been one of exploitation by others. Refusing to be taken advantage of, and taking time for your own valid concerns & personal interests, is not being selfish.

    Sounds like your circumstances and acquaintances are what need to be changed, as much as any changes in your own behavior. Just because other people are screwed up doesn't mean you must copy them. Find new friends and surroundings where decent behavior is treated decently. Then you can go back to being the non-selfish good guy you'd really rather be.
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    Mar 21, 2010 11:26 PM GMT
    Caslon14000 saidNot a crime...just immature. You haven't grown up yet...AT 28!!!


    Yes.. a number defines you and your life experience..
  • jgymnast733

    Posts: 1783

    Mar 21, 2010 11:56 PM GMT
    It's not a crime dear, CONGRATS on looking out for #1......
    I'v had to become selfish to keep my sanity because some people will milk you dry if you let them... Your not obligated to anyone except yourself and your sanity,,i'v had people [family too] take advantage and simply spit me out after chewing me up emotionally and financially....
    Good Luck Man, take care of yourself...
  • Akula

    Posts: 130

    Mar 22, 2010 1:10 AM GMT
    It looks like your swinging from one extreme to the next If you allowed everyone to use and abuse you then that sucks but to go in the total oposite direction is just as bad. You'' end up a very lonely bitter person, believe me there is a balance in between.
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    Mar 22, 2010 1:12 AM GMT
    yes bitch......yo selfish ass is going to jail where iz gonna be gangraped by gangzta killers.....and ur gon like it
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    Mar 22, 2010 1:27 AM GMT
    BadByMyself said1.Concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others

    2. Arising from concern with one's own welfare or advantage in disregard of others

    Over the years, I've put everyone else's needs & feelings before my own and I've realised one thing: they're never going to be satisfied & I get the short end of the stick. I've also looked at all of the losers, users, game players & dickweeds I've encountered over the years & realised that it's time to start being SELFISH & looking out for numero uno: ME.

    So do I think being selfish is a crime? No it isn't. When you think about it, you've got people who will lie to you before they ever tell the truth because they think it's going to dig them out of a hole. In fact, it does nothing more than dig you into a deeper hole.

    When it comes right down to it, I would rather be a selfish bastard rather than be a 2-timing manwhore, period. I know that I will never be satisfied because I'm human just like everyone else, I just happen to be someone who thinks of no one but himself. I'm good to kids and will put them first but as far as adults are concerned..don't expect a handout from me. I've laid my reputation on the line for people who have needed a paycheck and they have showed that their performance, period, is poor.

    So no more of putting my reputation on the line for anyone else, no more shelling out money to help folks, no more pleasing everyone else but myself.

    Granted, I am officially selfish...Is it a crime?



    First of all I don't think by refusing to help those who took advantage of you is being selfish but more of an automatic defense mechanism on your part. I too refuses to help anyone who will take advantage of my generosity! I've come across so many of them that nowadays I have develop a selfish-dar of sorts. I can tell if someone is gracious and grateful, and if my intuition fails I simply move on and just avoid the person. But you know closing shut your generous heart towards everyone is not healthy either, for the simple reason there are a lot good hearted and generous people still around! generous people have done a lot of good in this selfish world, so don't become a cookie cutter by being selfish like everyone else!!


    Leandro ♥
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    Mar 22, 2010 3:08 AM GMT
    There is a balance between the two.
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    Mar 22, 2010 3:59 AM GMT
    It is punishable by getting what you want and ticking people off. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Mar 22, 2010 5:24 AM GMT
    I would say being selfish is unnecessary. However.. not letting people walk all over you.. maintaining your priorities.. Making sure your needs and wants are seen to, as well as the needs and wants of others are given consideration.. There's nothing wrong with that.
  • imperator

    Posts: 626

    Mar 22, 2010 6:22 PM GMT
    I would say it's understandable that you feel the way you do, and that no-- it obviously isn't a "crime" to be selfish-- but before committing to this radical overhaul of how you live you may want to consider one thing that it sounds like you've overlooked: are you not talking about becoming the very kind of person that's exploited you for so long and made you so angry? If their behaviour at one extreme end of the "selfishness-altruism" scale has made your position at the other extreme end untenable, why would you want to become such a destructive, egocentric arsehole yourself? Why not try moving to the middle, instead? Instead of going from self-lessness or self-martyrdom to self-absorption, try self-consideration. Look out for #1, yes, because if you're impoverished then you have nothing to share; but hoarding won't make you happy.

    What you're talking about-- you'll just perpetuate the kind of mental and material abuse you've suffered and become the bad guy in someone else's narrative. You'll end up as wretched as those who you accuse-- and worse, because you'll know what it was like to be on the short end of such manipulations, someday you'll probably look back with regret on the intemperate choice you made. Just because others have treated you badly doesn't mean you have to become bad yourself to survive.

    So rather than negating yourself and pouring yourself out for ingrates, take care of yourself. But rather than negating others and using them up in some kind of "turnabout's fair play" vendetta-against-the-world, instead try simply scrutinizing those who ask for something from you. Wisely choose friends instead of giving in to anyone who makes you feel 'needed.' Be cautious but not closed.
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    Mar 22, 2010 6:42 PM GMT
    Everyone to an extent is selfish, but there's good reasons to be selfless, too. You could make more friends!
  • danisnotstr8

    Posts: 2579

    Mar 22, 2010 7:13 PM GMT
    BadByMyself said1.Concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others

    2. Arising from concern with one's own welfare or advantage in disregard of others


    Please post your concerns about the values of Republicans in the political forum. Thanks.
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    Mar 22, 2010 7:23 PM GMT
    Find a BALANCE and no can do anything to you unless you allow it!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 22, 2010 7:31 PM GMT
    Yesicon_razz.gif