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    Apr 05, 2010 2:32 PM GMT
    Topic deleted
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Apr 05, 2010 2:34 PM GMT
    It's been 9 weeks, you've made the effort and it's not reciprocated. You can do better, more on.
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    Apr 05, 2010 3:25 PM GMT
    he wanted a one shot thing .
    he's ignoring you, do you really want the guy ?
    you can't force anyone to love you.
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    Apr 05, 2010 3:31 PM GMT
    Hey carabouxo, imagine for a moment the rest of your life with him where it's always like this (I made a few tweaks, highlighted in blue):

    "I've tried all the possible ways to keep the romance alive without been a pain in his ass: harmless "good morning" text messages, flowers for his birthday, poetry once or twice (yes I am that cheesy...) I do get some feedback from him from time to time, but I don't know if it's just him trying to be polite, it's been 10 years now, and I'm starting to lose my hope."

    -Doug
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    Apr 05, 2010 3:51 PM GMT
    Best to move on, you can't change people, no matter how hard you try. Once you understand that, you start to view guys in a different way, either he's into you or he's not. Focus your romantic energy on someone who appreciates your flowers/poetry.
  • masculumpedes

    Posts: 5549

    Apr 05, 2010 9:58 PM GMT
    He got what he wanted from you and has moved on. If at all possible it helps to try and build some sort of a solid foundation first...to help keep the friendship alive.....before you go to bed with him.....unless that is all you want in the first place. icon_neutral.gif
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    Apr 05, 2010 10:48 PM GMT
    carabouxo said...and I'm pretty sure he did too...


    therein lies the rub. so long as you believe that, you will be haunted by the possibilities. you can never be "sure" or even "pretty sure." you can only know how he responds...which is nil.

    unrequited love...it is the stuff of myth and legend.
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    Apr 06, 2010 12:45 AM GMT
    carabouxo saidSo here is the scenario:

    I met this guy, we liked each other, we got laid, (It was amazing); I got really hooked up, but now he doesn't seem to be interested in me.

    I've made him very clear that I like him, I've tried to get together again ever since but always got a negative answer/excuse.

    I've tried all the possible ways to keep in touch without been a pain in his ass: harmless "good mornig" text messages, flowers for his birthday, poetry once or twice (yes I am that cheesy...) I do get some feedback from him from time to time, butI don't know if it's just him triying to be polite, it's been 9 weeks now, and I'm starting to lose my hope. The shitty part is that I'm so focused on the conquest that I've lost all my interest in all the other guys that I've got my chances with...

    Is it worth the effort? should I give up on him?



    I went exactly through the same thing you are going through with my recent ex boyfriend. I am also the romantic type and when I really like someone I express it and let them know in so many levels. But unlike you when I like someone I make sure he is into me just the same.

    As for you (correct me if I am wrong) your persistence is more of a "conquer" issue then a love issue. So be very careful to never force your feelings on others, even if you think you are nourishing all the love they need to grow and flourish. Love is not a potted plant where you can move it around from one place to another, and expect it to live as long you give it water and fertilizer? Love my friend is a plant that needs to grow in its natural environmental state, you cannot force it to live up to your expections otherwise it may shy away and eventually stop blooming.


    Leandro ♥



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 06, 2010 12:46 AM GMT
    He's just not that into you... icon_sad.gif
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    Apr 06, 2010 1:14 AM GMT
    After one hookup? and still hasn't met up with you again?

    Come on mate! he's not into you. I know it sucks, but move on. We have all been there before....
  • DrobUA

    Posts: 1331

    Apr 06, 2010 1:16 AM GMT
    Guys like to chase, not be chased... just my opinion.
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    Apr 06, 2010 2:12 PM GMT
    carabouxo said So It's over...
    thanx all!


    well, it doesn't have to be "over," just cooled. things like this sometimes take a while to ripen.
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 14341

    Apr 07, 2010 9:05 PM GMT
    Common sense will tell you that the guy is just not interested in you. Do yourself a good favor and forget about him and get on with your daily life. No point wasting your time going after a guy that has zero interest in you. There are countless other quality guys out there in the world. Get out and discover for yourself.
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    Apr 07, 2010 9:42 PM GMT
    Don't waste any more of your time on someone who can't reciprocate. Also, be careful if he shows a sudden interest when you've moved on and either started dating someone or have gotten over him. He may be the type of person who enjoys the attention but can't return it....and doesn't want anyone else to receive your attention. He really doesn't sound like he's worth your time and if you are looking for something more you should give your attention to someone who can treat you the way you want to be treated.
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    Apr 07, 2010 9:47 PM GMT
    screw that twat, go look for another guy...it will be his lost not yours
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    Apr 07, 2010 9:48 PM GMT
    carabouxo saidSo here is the scenario:

    I met this guy, we liked each other, we got laid, (It was amazing); I got really hooked up, but now he doesn't seem to be interested in me.

    I've made him very clear that I like him, I've tried to get together again ever since but always got a negative answer/excuse.

    I've tried all the possible ways to keep in touch without been a pain in his ass: harmless "good mornig" text messages, flowers for his birthday, poetry once or twice (yes I am that cheesy...) I do get some feedback from him from time to time, butI don't know if it's just him triying to be polite, it's been 9 weeks now, and I'm starting to lose my hope. The shitty part is that I'm so focused on the conquest that I've lost all my interest in all the other guys that I've got my chances with...

    Is it worth the effort? should I give up on him?


    Aww, sweetness, I don't wanna be rude or hurt your feelings cos ur clearly very sweet, but, honestly, you should have given up when the "good morning" texts got no response. Flowers and, Jesus, poetry, unless reciprocated, is verging upon bunny boiler territory, so stop NOW and give it to someone who wants it.

    And my advice, if he suddenly shows interest in you once you drop him, is to make sure you lead him on and then break the bastard's black heart. But that's just me.
  • Nayro

    Posts: 1825

    Apr 07, 2010 9:50 PM GMT
    just ask him.
  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Apr 07, 2010 9:51 PM GMT
    When he hits you with a restrainign order. Or an Axe.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 07, 2010 9:52 PM GMT
    Ever seen the movie 'He's Just Not That Into You'?
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    Apr 07, 2010 9:58 PM GMT
    That's unfortunate but it sounds like you came on a little strong.

    You both had fun and you should just leave it at that. He doesn't seem ready to give you what you want and you should respect that. It doesn't make him a bad person and you shouldn't expect much from a random hook up. Not to sound rude or anything but you seem a bit obsessed with him (almost stalkerish) and that's kinda creepy so maybe that's why he hasn't warmed up to your "charm" yet. After 3 months of pursuing the same guy and not getting the results you wanted I'd say it's time to let that fish go because it does not want to be caught.

    It is what is it and you shouldn't make it more then that. Move on and hopefully the next person you come into contact with will give you what you want (of the non sexual kind).
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    Apr 07, 2010 10:00 PM GMT
    As soon as you feel like you're chasing him, it's time to stop.
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    Apr 07, 2010 10:08 PM GMT
    I do believe it is time to move on. Nine weeks seems to long to waste your time on someone who obviously doesn't share the same affinity for you as you do for him. In due time you will find someone more suitable for you. I went through a similair situation recently. I was interested in someone, who seemed to reciprocate the feeling. Granted we hadn't slept together, but I made plans to go see him. Things seem to be going well and all of a sudden I received the brush off treatment. When I questioned him about it he used some lame excuse for being disconnected. Eventually I just got the hint and said "fuck it." There is really no point wasting your time with guys like that. They have no value for anyone and are pretty much worthless. You'll be okay...
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    Apr 23, 2010 4:42 PM GMT
    "Desmond's own relationships had tended to be short-term tugging matches. If he met someone he was interested in, he worried they wouldn't find him attractive or interesting enough. But if they reciprocated his enthusiasm, he felt the bar had been raised on his own net worth and was plagued by thoughts that he could have done better. It was like shopping in Morocco - once your offer was received, you felt you should have driven a harder bargain.

    The best way to avoid this cycle of disappointment was to flirt with friends and fuck with strangers and thus keep yourself suspended in a safe no-man's land somewhere between loneliness and suffocation. No soaring highs, but none of that 'get me out of here!' anxiety, either. And, after all, a comfortable emotional flatline was the Holy Grail half the population was seeking; how else do you explain the popularity of prozac, hydroponic tomatoes and Tom Hanks?"

    - Stephen McCauley in "True Enough"
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    Apr 23, 2010 4:48 PM GMT
    carabouxo said
    badmikeyt saidAs soon as you feel like you're chasing him, it's time to stop.


    That's how I've felt all this time...
    I guess It was hard to accept that there is someone who can resist falling for me after reading some of my poetry XD!!!

    Anyway, ironically (or not) since I've relaxed and stop trying, he has started to call... and try to get together...

    how fucked up is that?

    too late for that matters, I'm not interested anymore...

    thanx all again.


    sometimes the pursuit is far more fun...like the dog and butterfly.
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    Apr 23, 2010 5:21 PM GMT
    Sounds like a fuck 'n toss to me