keeping a reputation

  • johnny9027

    Posts: 90

    Apr 13, 2010 8:57 PM GMT
    Reputation sucks! Okay, almost everyone had been making out with ppl in bars or parties, and that doesn't mean anything, especially I was single then. Maybe sucking someone's dick in bar is a little bit over the top....BUT everyone r so drunk and ppl do things way worse than this! And now my new date is asking around to know about my reputation and appearantly there r ppl who r jealous about me having bf thing just told him that i'm a slut...gosh! Now he's interrogating me about my "history", and it seemed that he's not really interested in me since he knew something about me.

    What i wanna say is if u love me, u don't have to know me from other ppl, and i will be commited to u if we can really make a couple. If u think my reputation is bad then u can leave right nowicon_sad.gif
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    Apr 14, 2010 3:48 AM GMT
    Let's hope he's not too picky about good grammar and spelling. icon_confused.gif
  • Celticmusl

    Posts: 4330

    Apr 14, 2010 3:52 AM GMT
    I think reputation is important, and I try to live up to the standards that my parents set out for me in that respect. Also, if I do ever find another SO, he won't have anything to worry about in terms of my reputation and neither will I.
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    Apr 14, 2010 3:55 AM GMT
    Well in all honesty if you were worried about your reputation then you wouldn't do things that might tarnish it.

    The fact that your current bf is asking around about you speaks volumes. If he can't come up and ask you in person then I say you are better off without him but then again that asks another question as to why he hasn't asked you about you yet? Maybe something about you says untruthful and he feels he wouldn't get an honest answer from you.

    Whatever the reason I hope you have learned something from this experience. Actions do speak louder then words. A reputation is hard to build but easy to destroy just like trust.
  • BuckeyeJock13

    Posts: 44

    Apr 14, 2010 4:04 AM GMT
    I try not to let what strangers or acquaintances say about someone impact my impression of him or her. If it's a close friend I will listen to what they have to say more intently. I also realize gay men can be caddy. Everyone deserves a chance and I trust my instinct more then anything. If you have a guy who is interested in seeing what dirt he can dig up on you then that's not a good sign anyway.
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    Apr 14, 2010 4:11 AM GMT
    If your worried about your reputation and have nothing to worry about, why worry?
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    Apr 14, 2010 4:15 AM GMT
    then don't suck cock in a bar
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    Apr 14, 2010 4:17 AM GMT
    calibro....that's the most sensible answer yet in respone to this thread. LOL.
  • BlackBeltGuy

    Posts: 2609

    Apr 14, 2010 5:45 AM GMT
    calibro saidthen don't suck cock in a bar


    HE JUST TRUMPED THE THREAD. INF LOLZ
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    Apr 14, 2010 12:08 PM GMT
    johnny9027 saidReputation sucks! Okay, almost everyone had been making out with ppl in bars or parties, and that doesn't mean anything, especially I was single then. Maybe sucking someone's dick in bar is a little bit over the top....BUT everyone r so drunk and ppl do things way worse than this! And now my new date is asking around to know about my reputation and appearantly there r ppl who r jealous about me having bf thing just told him that i'm a slut...gosh! Now he's interrogating me about my "history", and it seemed that he's not really interested in me since he knew something about me.

    What i wanna say is if u love me, u don't have to know me from other ppl, and i will be commited to u if we can really make a couple. If u think my reputation is bad then u can leave right nowicon_sad.gif


    Well, one thing is certain: your communications skills and lack of attention to detail make you look like an idiot.

    From the gibberish you've written here, it seems you two just aren't a fit.
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    Apr 14, 2010 12:10 PM GMT
    Your pedigree is as important as your reputation. If you lie down with dogs you'll get fleas. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
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    Apr 14, 2010 12:14 PM GMT
    johnny9027 saidReputation sucks! Okay, almost everyone had been making out with ppl in bars or parties, and that doesn't mean anything, especially I was single then. Maybe sucking someone's dick in bar is a little bit over the top....BUT everyone r so drunk and ppl do things way worse than this! And now my new date is asking around to know about my reputation and appearantly there r ppl who r jealous about me having bf thing just told him that i'm a slut...gosh! Now he's interrogating me about my "history", and it seemed that he's not really interested in me since he knew something about me.

    What i wanna say is if u love me, u don't have to know me from other ppl, and i will be commited to u if we can really make a couple. If u think my reputation is bad then u can leave right nowicon_sad.gif
    Simple solution: Date like-minded people, and let the prudes go their separate ways. icon_smile.gif
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    Apr 14, 2010 12:43 PM GMT
    Reputations are for housewives in the 1950's. If he really likes you it wont matter what others say to him, and if he was smart he'd know that gay people (especially constant clubbers) talk shit like the ladies at a tamale making factory...
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 14, 2010 12:52 PM GMT
    The reality is, you are judged by others from the moment they meet you.
    Perception by others is a factor. How many times do RJ members ask.. "how do you meet a good man" and many of us suggest meeting through friends since you will have some idea how the guy reacts to others and you don't have to guess what he does (for a living), his background, etc
    (or complain later about the fact you are dealing with deception).

    You should never judge someone by others' perceptions, yours is the most important, but its a part of the "molding" process, whether you like it or not.
    Hearing someone is a "slut" isn't particularly attractive to some. Sure its cool to have fun... but a reputation is generally earned based on consistent behavior, not just one wild night sucking dick in a bar.
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    Apr 14, 2010 1:05 PM GMT
    I can truthfully tell you that in the City I live I have no reputation in the gay community at all! I gave back my gay card over 20 years ago. Funny things is, when I do go out to a gay bub or club, and thats once every few years. I have a look about me that leeds people to assume, I'm new and Innocent. Many even think I have a wife and kids at home.icon_lol.gif

    So go away for 20 + years.

    Remember a lot of gay men are like a haggle of women, they love to character assassinate people; bastardise their reputation if you like.
  • johnny9027

    Posts: 90

    Apr 14, 2010 1:56 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidThe reality is, you are judged by others from the moment they meet you.
    Perception by others is a factor. How many times do RJ members ask.. "how do you meet a good man" and many of us suggest meeting through friends since you will have some idea how the guy reacts to others and you don't have to guess what he does (for a living), his background, etc
    (or complain later about the fact you are dealing with deception).

    You should never judge someone by others' perceptions, yours is the most important, but its a part of the "molding" process, whether you like it or not.
    Hearing someone is a "slut" isn't particularly attractive to some. Sure its cool to have fun... but a reputation is generally earned based on consistent behavior, not just one wild night sucking dick in a bar.


    that's very true tho, u can't judge a person by what he had done at one crazy night
  • johnny9027

    Posts: 90

    Apr 14, 2010 1:57 PM GMT
    calibro saidthen don't suck cock in a bar


    LOL, I do learn this lesson from my experience, at least not letting other ppl know...