At what age does it start becoming pathetic to still be living with the rents?

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    Apr 14, 2010 11:05 PM GMT
    Or if you don't think it's ever 'pathetic,' when do you think is a good time to make the move?

    I've been out of college almost 2 years now and I'm still living with the rents. I have a job and could easily support myself if I moved. Now that my 24th birthday is coming up, people have begun cracking wise ass jokes about it. Including my boyfriend. Fucker. But I'm saving a shizton by living at home. So what do you think, is the independence worth it? Am I closing in on completely and utterly pathetic?
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    Apr 14, 2010 11:11 PM GMT
    It highly depends.....

    If an individual is in graduate or professional school

    If they live in a city of high rents where moving out would cost $1000+ a month to live in a box

    How much debt they accumulated going through college

    If they are in an internship unpaid or low pay not enough to live on


    but 23 would say... if they are working, 25 if in college (undergrad/starting out) or up to 30 if all or most of the above

    after that it becomes pathetic
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    Apr 15, 2010 12:32 AM GMT
    At what age does it start becoming pathetic to still be living with the rents?

    The answer lies in whether living at home is part of your legitimate long-term strategy, or a loser's lame story. Do you have a plan for yourself?
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    Apr 15, 2010 12:40 AM GMT
    You should have been out of there 2 years ago. You're mooching off your folks and/or insecure I think because you said you could afford to leave. Besides house prices are at record lows you have no excuse.
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    Apr 15, 2010 12:47 AM GMT
    Here's the ultimate test: if you just met an otherwise presentable 24-year-old, but learned he was still living with Mom & Dad, would you see him as dating material?
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    Apr 15, 2010 1:02 AM GMT
    I am paying off my student loans, so I guess I'll milk that excuse as much as I possibly can.

    As for the market, sure it's a good time to buy and I can afford it, but I want to buy in the city, and I would have to commute to work in the burbs until I'm able to transfer to Philly a year from now. So I've got a general plan going on. And I'm not moochin >_< .. my parents want me to stay home more than I do.

    But anywho, I guess the gist I'm getting so far is that yes, I am bordering on completely and utterly pathetic. icon_redface.gif
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    Apr 15, 2010 1:06 AM GMT
    There's no shame in staying with family to save money. As long as you're happy with your living arrangements, fuck what others think. If they're giving you hell about it, they're not your friends.
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    Apr 15, 2010 1:44 AM GMT
    Everyone had different reasons...don't hate!
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    Apr 15, 2010 1:59 AM GMT
    I moved out in August, basically b/c I couldnt take the fighting between the folks, lol. They travelled a lot with work so I had the run of the house, hadda take care of their animals and house while they were gone. It was a sweet deal since I'm in an apprenticeship which means 2 months a year of schooling, unpaid, in order to advance and maintain my job. Now that I've movied out, i pay 400$ a month for a bedroom, and the owners are looking at selling the house, so I may be moving back in with the folks temporarily until I can find something I can afford, though considering such a low vacancy rate and high cost of property and rent, its unlikely unless some friends go in with me. Haveta see.
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    Apr 15, 2010 2:03 AM GMT
    My ex was a spell older than me (me - 18 him- 27) and he was still living with his folks.

    In most respects he seemed mature and was living the life of a twenty seven year old... and then in other respects he seemed younger than me.

    Living with his parents were one of those things. It's really hard to date someone when you have to see their parents all the time. Granted, I really liked his parents, but I felt like after a while they sort of started to blame me for his shortcomings and why he wasn't furthering his degree, etc.

    Either way, I moved out the second I turned 18 and haven't looked back. I live in Orange County and it's expensive (not New York expensive, but I'm certainly poor) and I'm happy as a clam and the relationship with my parents is fine. I pay for everything as well..

    The fact that you're having to ask us sort of tells me you're starting to get uncomfortable with it... so... maybe it's time?

    -Jordan
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    Apr 15, 2010 5:49 AM GMT
    It's only pathetic if you're sponging off your parents, and have no ambitions/plans to move out eventually. My friend's sister lived with her parents until she was 30-ish. By the time she moved out, she saved up enough money for a 50% down payment on a house. Also in some cultures, the children are expected to live with the parents until they get married.
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    Apr 15, 2010 6:19 AM GMT
    Living with your parents in this economy is actually a smart thing to do. Don't just live there and spend freely...Live there and save your money. Then when and if you move out you will have alot of money in the bank. Its good to have 8 months worth of savings in the bank. When will people stop worrying what others think. Being 30 and over and living with parents is not a choice for many people now days i would not judge them it really is not easy out there. And having parents that can help is a blessing.
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    Apr 15, 2010 6:21 AM GMT
    If through inertia, not so cool, if there are reasons it´s not a deal breaker as long as they one day plan to move out.
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    Apr 15, 2010 8:11 AM GMT
    Wow, in my culture you only permanently leave the house when you get married and even then some couples live with the spouse's parents until they can afford a house of their own. The only exception to that societal norm is when you have to study or work abroad.

    My single uncle has lived with his parents all his life and he is now approaching the age of sixty. However, I still don't think it's pathetic. It's hard to when you've grown up thinking and seeing that it's okay.

    Personally, I think that if you are comfortable with living with your parents then stay until you decide to move out. As long as you try to help them out as much as they are helping you by letting you stay then I don't believe there's anything wrong with that. It seems to me that you didn't have a problem with this arrangement either until your friends and boyfriend teased you about it. Would you rather endure that now and be more financially ''stress free'' later on or move out now and well, really test yourself? Is your priority what other people think of you and pleasing them or is it sticking to the plan that will benefit you financially?

    Part of independency, I believe, is being able to face the consequences of your decisions by yourself. If that means having to put up with your friends teasing you then so be it. You don't have to make excuses or try to justify your actions. Just stay focused on the bigger picture here.

    But anyway, what do I know, I'm still living with the 'rents. icon_razz.gificon_eek.gificon_confused.gif