Just a thought,...enjoy

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 26, 2008 11:32 PM GMT
    icon_biggrin.gif In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb"




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    Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only..Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.




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    The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.




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    Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S . Treasury.




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    Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.




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    Coca-Cola was originally green.




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    It is impossible to lick your elbow.




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    The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work:


    Alaska


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    The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...)




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    The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%


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    The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $ 16,400


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    The average number of people airborne over the U.S. in any given hour:


    61,000


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    Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.




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    The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.




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    The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.




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    Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:




    Spades - King David


    Hearts - Charlemagne


    Clubs -Alexander, the Great


    Diamonds - Julius Caesar


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    111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321


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    If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.




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    Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.




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    Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?




    A. Their birthplace


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    Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?




    A. Obsession


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    Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?




    A. One thousand


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    Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?




    A. All were invented by women.




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    Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?




    A. Honey


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    Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day of the year?




    A. Father's Day


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    In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.


    When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."




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    It was the accepted
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    Jan 26, 2008 11:42 PM GMT
    It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.




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    In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England , when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them "Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down."




    It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"




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    Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.




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    At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!




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    Don't delete this just because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can read it.




    I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?




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    YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2008 when...




    1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.




    2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.




    3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.




    4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.




    5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.




    6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.




    7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen




    8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.




    10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.




    11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )




    12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.




    13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.




    14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.




    15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~


    NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself.




    Go on, forward this to your friends. You know you want too.
  • Squarejaw

    Posts: 1035

    Jan 27, 2008 5:47 AM GMT
    The Oxford Dictionary isn't sure where the word "golf" came from, but says it may be related to Dutch kolf ‘club, bat’.

    http://www.askoxford.com/concise_oed/golf?view=uk
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 5:56 AM GMT
    Okay, so I tried to lick my elbow and it really bothers me that I can't.icon_mad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 6:27 AM GMT
    I just tried to lick RB's elbow and I couldn't either icon_twisted.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 6:50 AM GMT
    Hmmmm... I wonder if Gene Simmons can lick his elbow...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 6:53 AM GMT
    i just licked my oboe!
  • trebor965

    Posts: 200

    Jan 27, 2008 7:56 AM GMT
    taht turley is smoe cazry siht. hnoselty, i dnot tnihk tihs wrkos. aslo nveer terid lckniig my ebolw. gerat psot.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 9:20 AM GMT
    Yeah...I only tried a little bit but I already knew!icon_evil.gif


    Reading all those mix matched words makes me feel dyslexic...icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 4:03 PM GMT
    WHY...OH WHY CAN'T I LICK MY ELBOW!!!!!!.NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! icon_cry.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 4:04 PM GMT
    Bitch'n post!

    "Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better."

    yes, men are more light sensitive and women are more sound sensitive.

    if you've ever lived with sisters/female roomies this will explain why they'll turn on every single freagin light in the house even in broad daylight. drove me crazy!!

    and then if you have a little volume to your music they freak!!!


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    Jan 27, 2008 4:25 PM GMT
    Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?

    A. Honey


    Can anyone say why?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 4:32 PM GMT
    Honey is naturally anti-microbial. In fact the ancient Egyptians used it like Neosporin.
    Aren't twinkies spoil proof too?icon_eek.gif
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    Jan 27, 2008 4:38 PM GMT
    fitguymike saidHoney is naturally anti-microbial. In fact the ancient Egyptians used it like Neosporin.
    Aren't twinkies spoil proof too?icon_eek.gif


    No. I try keeping them bound and gagged in the hall closet for later use, but they stink the place up after a couple weeks. Maybe I need to sprinkle 'em with Fruit Fresh or some other preservative.....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 4:47 PM GMT
    Like Honey? icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 27, 2008 4:58 PM GMT
    Do the same people that try to lick their elbow try to lick other body parts?
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jan 27, 2008 5:04 PM GMT
    Honey will burn the back of your throat, too.
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    Jan 27, 2008 9:12 PM GMT
    icon_biggrin.gif


    Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a
    party. After several drinks, one of the men had to use the restroom.
    Those who remained talked about their kids.

    The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at
    a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied
    Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the
    corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He
    became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes
    for his birthday."

    The second guy said, "That's terrific! My son is also my pride and
    joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school
    to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where
    he owns the majority of its assets He's so rich that he gave his best
    friend a brand new jet for his birthday."

    The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best
    universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own
    construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away
    something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his
    birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion."

    The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned
    from the restroom and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?" One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the
    successes of our sons. What about your son?" The fourth man replied:
    "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub."

    The three friends said: "What a shame... what a disappointment."
    The fourth man replied: "No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love
    him. And he hasn't done too bad either. His birthday was two
    weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a
    brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three
    boyfriends."



    icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jan 27, 2008 9:34 PM GMT
    drewanjm saidDo the same people that try to lick their elbow try to lick other body parts?


    If I could lick some of my other parts I would never leave the house. Sometimes I'm really jealous of catsicon_rolleyes.gif
  • Squarejaw

    Posts: 1035

    Jan 29, 2008 5:33 AM GMT
    RBY71, don't be jealous -- with enough effort and patience, you'll eventually be able to lick your cat's parts.
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    Jan 29, 2008 5:39 AM GMT
    LMAO!
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    Jan 29, 2008 5:43 AM GMT
    RBY71 saidLMAO!


    I have to second that. That was too funny, good one SJ.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 29, 2008 6:08 AM GMT
    U ever look at urself in the mirror and say, "damn!,...I'll fuck u," yeah, me too. icon_lol.gif

    BTW, isn't laughter grand,...icon_lol.gif
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    Feb 02, 2008 12:41 PM GMT
    I beg to differ on the statue, in Lexington Kentucky we have a statue of General John Hunt Morgan. He was killed after being captured by union soldiers. Technically, that would be in battle even though he was executed after capture. The statue in Lexington has a horse with all four legs on the ground. Once in awhile UK students paint the horse's balls orange.
    By the way, I don't live in Kentucky anymore but we are quite proud of General Morgan.


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    Feb 02, 2008 6:00 PM GMT
    In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb"
    ------The earliest citation comes from Sir William Hope’s The Compleat Fencing-Master, second edition, 1692, page 157: "What he doth, he doth by rule of thumb, and not by art." The term is thought to originate with wood workers who used the length of their thumbs rather than rulers for measuring things.



    Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only..Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
    ----false, The word golf was first mentioned in writing in 1457 on a Scottish statute on forbidden games as gouf, possibly derived from the Scots word goulf (variously spelled) meaning "to strike or cuff". This word may, in turn, be derived from the Dutch word kolf, meaning "bat," or "club," and the Dutch sport of the same name.



    The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
    ------if you count them as real person, still, Flintstone dated 1960-66
    but it was during 1947, a 15-minute program entitled Mary Kay and Johnny shows the first couple in bed


    Coca-Cola was originally green.
    -------false, The original formula called for caramel to give Coca-Cola its rich brown color, and although the recipe has undergone some changes through the years, none of them affected the ultimate color of the product


    The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...)
    The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
    ----False, America wilderness act shows 17% total land
    Africa has 21.8% of Forests and woodlands, not including deserts


    Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
    ----it chances from time to time, but playing cards emerged in 9th century China. Ancient Chinese "money cards" have four "suits": coins, strings of coins, myriads of strings, and tens of myriads. These were represented by ideograms, with numerals of 2–9 in the first three suits and numerals 1–9 in the "tens of myriads".


    If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
    ------false, "To the best of anyone's knowledge, the position and pose of the statue do not signify anything," said Frances Pollard, a curator at the Virginia Historical Society.


    Too tired to check the rest.