Embarrassing Moments in Dating (Volume 1)

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    Apr 18, 2010 11:38 PM GMT
    Okay, Embarrassing Moments in Dating...

    One happened to me just recently...

    I got an unexpected first kiss from a guy I'd been hoping to get a date with for YEARS. This would have been great if not for the fact that RIGHT before he kissed me I had popped a tortilla chip into my mouth. I still had remnants of said tortilla chip floating around in there when we kissed. Being so caught up in the moment I didn't realize the problem until he pulled away quickly and said, "Fritos..."

    Gross....While it was still a pretty damn good kiss, I doubt there will be a second one...Admittedly that's a huge turnoff...Ugh...

    I'm sure others have stories that are far more embarrassing than mine...Lets share them...
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    Apr 19, 2010 1:14 AM GMT
    I was recently on a date with a hot red-headed 20yo sailor stationed at Pearl Harbor. While standing at a coffee shop, we ran into one of his previous flings/bf/fb/whatever who struck up a conversation with my date, "Kryptonite". I could tell my date was a bit uncomfortable and nervous, but he was polite despite the obviousness of the fire that still burned inside of Mr. Fling. I let the conversation go for a while, then with a big ol grin I politely interjected...

    "You'll have to pardon us, but we must be going. It's about that time for Kryptonite to ride my dick again. Isn't it buddy?" as I turned to look at Kryptonite.

    All he could do was grin and nod "Yes".

    And we went home. icon_twisted.gif
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    Apr 19, 2010 2:01 AM GMT
    omg GAMrican, a night out on the town with you would be nothing but outrageous fun!


    ..and Indy, maybe the guy likes Fritos. icon_wink.gif
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    Apr 19, 2010 3:00 AM GMT
    I don't have a lot of really embarrassing date stories. But I'm looking forward to reading more of yours. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Apr 19, 2010 3:14 AM GMT
    So I was on a date with a really hot former olympic skater (shocker, eh?) and getting up to go to the bathroom (or something, honestly I don't even remember how it happened) I practically knocked over the table. Good thing we hadn't yet been served dinner. [Damn flimsy tables... I should have sued the chain!]
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    Apr 19, 2010 3:32 AM GMT
    A couple years ago I was out on a date with a guy who lied to me about his age. Said he was 19 about to turn 20, but he had just turned 18. (I was 20).

    After letting that slide, we went to the beach where we sat by the lighthouse by the harbor. I had no idea why I wanted to go there, The smell of rotting sea vegetation was far too romantic for what this little leech deserved (did i mention he made me pay for dinner after we agreed to go half/half, and proceeded to tell me after that "he had just gotten paid that morning"...dildo).

    Anyhow, we sat there, and i was getting VERY cold....being in a thin button up shirt, jeans and flipflops...He in jeans and a thick woolly sweatshirt.
    I said "Hey its kinda cold out--"
    He cut me off "is it cold? or is...it...HOT?" he says in his "Sexy voice" he then proceeds to unbutton my shirt...thinking its gonna get me all hot and bothered.
    I replied "Uh, NO, its actually really cold...."
    Thank god the beach rangers came by and kicked us off the jetty (after 5 awkward minutes of trying to re button my shirt)

    Next segment: As we get in my car, i begin to drive across an intersection, and as I look his direction to watch for on-coming traffic, he grabs my face and starts trying to make out with me (or devour my soul...couldn't tell).
    In a panic, I jammed on what i thought was the brake....it wasnt...it was the accelerator. My car went hurtling towards the sidewalk and almost popped up the curb, up someones lawn, and into someones den.
    after regaining control of the situation i asked him "The FUCK was that?!"
    his reply, "I couldnt help myself"

    Back at the parking lot, he had gotten on the subject of tattoos, and he started saying how distasteful they were...to which i proceeded to roll up my sleeves and show him my 2 tattoos....
    Stammering, he back tracks "Oh well, they look good on you!"
    too late...prick.

    So finally, i walk him to his car (10 feet away) and say "alright, night, ill see ya"
    to which he asks "can i drive you back to your car?"
    I look at my car, then back at him and I reply "I think i can manage"
    "Please?" He whines.
    "FINE!"

    So he drives me over to my car...all of 10 feet... and leans in for a good bye kiss....To which i grab his wrist and give him a forced High Five and say "this was fun. We'll be in touch" and i scrambled out of that car as quickly as possible.... I was embarrassed i even agreed to that date.

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    Apr 19, 2010 4:33 AM GMT
    Hey Sam, I think that you agreeing to this date and going through with it is very cool. How else do you find out? I had a good chuckle over the way you described events.

    -Doug
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    Apr 19, 2010 4:57 AM GMT
    Sam31488 said.... I was embarrassed i even agreed to that date.


    It sounds like you handled everything with grace and style.
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:02 AM GMT
    I can usually avoid embarrassment on a date if I'm sober...But I have half-memories of spilling a bunch of things when I've been...not so sober...But hey at that point it's just funny! Serves you right for being around wacky drunk Miguel!
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:07 AM GMT
    meninlove said Hey Sam, I think that you agreeing to this date and going through with it is very cool. How else do you find out? I had a good chuckle over the way you described events.

    -Doug


    Well, Doug, i neglected to mention the "Deranged Bilbo Baggins" look he got every time he rolled his eyes...which was often...


    Bilbo Baggins Pictures, Images and Photos
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:08 AM GMT
    meninlove said
    ..and Indy, maybe the guy likes Fritos. icon_wink.gif



    LOL...he was smiling when he said it so maybe he did. Still embarrassing because one of the things I pride myself on is being a great kisser...I was caught off guard with that one, LOL
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    Apr 19, 2010 6:51 AM GMT
    I went on a date with someone who seemed to have a good personnality and good pictures.Turns out he looks like a nerd,really dorky,speech problems.
    First thing we ask is what to eat....he wants McDonalds,because he tells me that hes been working there for 7 years in the past.
    I was like icon_eek.gif
    So anyway,we continue chatting for 5 minutes and I just feel bad for the guy.He says hes going to drop off his things at work (he still had his stuff from work on).
    I really wanted to leave but I was thingking to myself....dont do this,it will ruin his self-esteem,etc.
    Then I receive this text message saying that he doesnt want to continue on the date with me....I replied good I really wanted to get out but was to shy to leave.But still its the ugliest nerd that turned me down first!!!!!
    And of course,I went to a music shows the day after and was with my friend and then she saw one of her gay friend and he was with him with a bunch of other people.Just said hi and talked with everybody and ignored him.
    What kind of badluck is that?
    I defnitely hit rock-bottom the day I was turned out by that ugly nerd.Never went on a date again since then lol
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    Apr 19, 2010 7:03 AM GMT
    snowboarder said
    I defnitely hit rock-bottom the day I was turned out by that ugly nerd.Never went on a date again since then lol


    Count your blessings. Get back into the rodeo.

    If it's any solace to you, I have tended to be the dumpee on my bad dates. I can usually find some way to become radioactive on a bad date. It seems easier for the dumper to move on.
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    Apr 19, 2010 2:02 PM GMT
    The worst and embarrassing date I've ever been on was with this guy who was probably 15-20 years older than me, I would've been 20 or so, and he took me out to this local rock gig and after getting beers, a table in an open space with no one around us under a spotlight and 5 minutes of small talk, nothing. Everything he said afterward was a one word reply which was frustrating, so I gave up and chain smoked a pack of cigarettes to avoid talking to him.
    He called me before our date to ask what I was wearing and wore exactly the same thing so I'm this bar thinking everyone's looking at us like I'm his toyboy in matching outfits. After he drove me home, my head was spinning so bad from all the smoking I tried to induce vomit and almost called an ambulance. Great bands though.
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:14 PM GMT
    GAMRican said
    snowboarder said
    I defnitely hit rock-bottom the day I was turned out by that ugly nerd.Never went on a date again since then lol


    Count your blessings. Get back into the rodeo.

    If it's any solace to you, I have tended to be the dumpee on my bad dates. I can usually find some way to become radioactive on a bad date. It seems easier for the dumper to move on.


    I prefer to meet someone when its a friend of a friend and you dont have those awkward dates thing.So no dates anymore for me,I think it will come when I wont suspect it...
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:16 PM GMT
    snowboarder saidI went on a date with someone who seemed to have a good personnality and good pictures.Turns out he looks like a nerd,really dorky,speech problems.


    I still don't understand how people can be brave enough to do this...I'd rather get no pic than a fake pic.

    I've met guys that tell me they refuse to send pics because they are oh-so desirable and they don't want people stealing pics/knowing about them....and they joke about my "old age" and how they are so young (usually only by a 4-7 years)...then we meet and it turns out they're not attractive and look WAAY OLDER than me...SMH
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:22 PM GMT
    I don't think this counts as *embarrassing*....but I have had someone bail out on hanging out with me cause they were "too horny". He said he wanted me to come over to his place and he knew he would try and do dirty things with me.



    ....yeah thanks for the offer but I'll pass.
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    Apr 19, 2010 5:30 PM GMT
    Sam31488 saidBack at the parking lot, he had gotten on the subject of tattoos, and he started saying how distasteful they were...to which i proceeded to roll up my sleeves and show him my 2 tattoos....
    Stammering, he back tracks "Oh well, they look good on you!"
    too late...prick.

    Maybe he's practicing to be the next Rodney Dangerfield. View this clip to the end.

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    Apr 19, 2010 6:10 PM GMT
    I'm still trying to think of any for myself, guess there can't be too many, or else I've done a PTSD repressed memory thing or something. But this happened to a guy while I was dating him:

    We drove 240 miles together to Minneapolis for an extended weekend, to both accomplish some business for him, and get to know each other better, having just met 3 weeks earlier. One of our personal side-trips on Saturday was to a big Ren Faire nearby.

    So we're strolling the acres of exhibits, and meeting lots of gay men we already know mutually, or individually, most in period costumes, some performing in singing and theatrical groups. And suddenly my date gasps, and blurts out: "Quick, turn around!"

    But it was too late, and a second later he says to me: "It's my brother, with his whole family, and they already saw me! How do we explain you?" He'd previously told me he wasn't out to his family, partly for family financial entanglements with this older brother, who was a homophobe. So he walks over to greet his brother, his sister-in-law, and their teenage children, leaving me standing awkwardly alone.

    Well, I have little fear of people, and complete confidence in my ability to project a straight image when I must. So I assertively came over and introduced myself as a friend of their relative from back home, all smiles and glad for the opportunity to meet them.

    And I worked into our conversation that I had "hitched" a ride to Mpls when I learned my friend was going on business, so that I could see the Ren Faire, and isn't it great, how are you enjoying it, ever see it before, etc. And I even mentioned the hotel where we had "rooms" (in truth just 1 room with 1 King bed), wondering if they were staying nearby, maybe we could have dinner while we were all in town. I calculated that being all openness would allay their suspicions better than if we both acted guilty and evasive. I learned afterward that's exactly how it came across.

    But afterwards my date was still shaken, and just a short time later, as we continued our tour of the grounds, he collapsed unconscious, presenting me with an unknown medical emergency. He recovered at a medical station where I had him brought, greatly embarrassed by his faint, which his personal doctor later attributed to losing too much weight recently, and eating too little food before walking the grounds, to which I privately included the emotional shock of running into his brother.

    I like to think I wow my dates, but having them faint on me is more than I would wish. LOL!
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    Apr 19, 2010 6:29 PM GMT
    Red_Vespa said
    Sam31488 saidBack at the parking lot, he had gotten on the subject of tattoos, and he started saying how distasteful they were...to which i proceeded to roll up my sleeves and show him my 2 tattoos....
    Stammering, he back tracks "Oh well, they look good on you!"
    too late...prick.

    Maybe he's practicing to be the next Rodney Dangerfield. View this clip to the end.



    Flawless. That sums it up. The kid wasn't nearly as funny as Mr.Dangerfield, though...
  • jrs1

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    Apr 19, 2010 7:09 PM GMT
    Sam31488 saidA couple years ago ...
    Next segment: As we get in my car, i begin to drive across an intersection, and as I look his direction to watch for on-coming traffic, he grabs my face and starts trying to make out with me (or devour my soul...couldn't tell).
    In a panic, I jammed on what i thought was the brake....it wasnt...it was the accelerator. My car went hurtling towards the sidewalk and almost popped up the curb, up someones lawn, and into someones den.
    after regaining control of the situation i asked him "The FUCK was that?!"
    his reply, "I couldnt help myself"

    oh ... my ... god.

    that was ... an amazing story from which you survived. Samuel ♥
  • rnch

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    Apr 19, 2010 7:17 PM GMT
    i broke wind while i was being rimmed. icon_redface.gif
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    Apr 19, 2010 10:02 PM GMT
    Warning to Troll Patrol! Tangent below. Read no further!

    snowboarder saidI think it will come when I wont suspect it...


    Bingo! That's my attitude and approach. I'm not actively looking for a relationship. I'm out to meet new people for activities and to possibly make friends. If more comes from it than that, excellent. If not, no expectations, no worries.
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    Apr 19, 2010 10:04 PM GMT
    rnch saidi broke wind while i was being rimmed. icon_redface.gif


    ..that's kind of hillarious and cute and HILLARIOUS icon_lol.gif
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    Apr 19, 2010 10:39 PM GMT
    My first boyfriend broke up with me when we were on vacation in Japan, just a month after I came out to my family so they'd know why I was really there.

    Coming home from that to tell my family and friends what happened was very emberrasing