I don't know if i'm gay.

  • blueswinger

    Posts: 4

    May 06, 2010 12:44 AM GMT
    Hey, so it's been awhile i had this confusion since i was 14.
    I feel attracted to guys sexually ,but thats about it .i could never imagine myself going out, holding hands with them.

    There was this one period of time, where my girlfriend hurted me real bad, and after me and my bestfriend we went out to drink.

    we all got drunk and the next thing you know, i'm making my moves on him, he was rejecting it at 1st, but then he gave in, we just wank each other off, but as times goes on, we started sucking each other off 2. We never fucked thou, because i think that crosses the boundaries.
    We only do this kinda stuff, when we're drunk and when there's no girl around.
    we never ever talk or mentioned about it the next day.
    That was about a year ago. We don't do it anymore, because i've a girlfriend, and so does he. .

    I enjoy having sex, and beeing around hot gorgeous women but at the same time, i also think about hot guys.. masculine guys, not the feminine guys.
    I really don't want to think that i'm gay, because i enjoy girls 2, and i want to have relationship with them.
    and i keep telling myself that this is just a "confuse phase" of life and i'll get through it.

    Am i just confuse? i don't know. .. Anyone out there that use to like girls 2 .
    Well i'm hoping someone could help
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    May 06, 2010 12:48 AM GMT
    You could be bisexual and like both.

    I know I'm gay as I have never had any interest in women other than as platonic friends. Not interested in women sexually or romantically, and have never been with them in that way, either.
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    May 06, 2010 1:01 AM GMT
    Yep, you're confused. It's perfectly normal though. And so is being gay.
    The hardest part is putting the stereotypes and the "gay is bad" ideas out of your head. Once you do that, then it will be easier to come to terms with yourself as you are.

    As for not ass fucking, that's not needed to be gay. I don't even like it, yet still identify as gay because I'm attracted to men. And being attracted to masculine men doesn't make you any straighter...it actually makes you gayer because "straight" men are most likely to be attracted to feminine guys. Straight men like girlie stuff, hence the reason they like to fuck girls.

    Hope this helps. Oh and the last couple lines are just my sarcastic b/s. icon_biggrin.gif
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    May 06, 2010 1:09 AM GMT
    blueswinger saidHey, so it's been awhile i had this confusion since i was 14.
    I feel attracted to guys sexually ,but thats about it .i could never imagine myself going out, holding hands with them.

    There was this one period of time, where my girlfriend hurted me real bad, and after me and my bestfriend we went out to drink.

    we all got drunk and the next thing you know, i'm making my moves on him, he was rejecting it at 1st, but then he gave in, we just wank each other off, but as times goes on, we started sucking each other off 2. We never fucked thou, because i think that crosses the boundaries.
    We only do this kinda stuff, when we're drunk and when there's no girl around.
    we never ever talk or mentioned about it the next day.
    That was about a year ago. We don't do it anymore, because i've a girlfriend, and so does he. .

    I enjoy having sex, and beeing around hot gorgeous women but at the same time, i also think about hot guys.. masculine guys, not the feminine guys.
    I really don't want to think that i'm gay, because i enjoy girls 2, and i want to have relationship with them.
    and i keep telling myself that this is just a "confuse phase" of life and i'll get through it.

    Am i just confuse? i don't know. .. Anyone out there that use to like girls 2 .
    Well i'm hoping someone could help


    I used to feel the same way, that I was only attracted to men sexually. As time has gone on, things continually go back and forth - more sexual attraction to one v.s. the other, or wanting a realtionship with one more than the other. I have been in a relationship with both men and women, as well as sexually involved, and come to the conclusion that,for now, while I am attracted to both sexually I'm only interested a relationship with a man. BUt things could change, who knows?

    Honestly, the best advice I could give you from my experience would be to keep an open mind - experiment (safely) with both sexes to find what you like and don't like, but rather than putting a label on yourself by thinking "____ is what I am", stay open to the idea that you might change in the future.
  • demonicius

    Posts: 26

    May 06, 2010 3:12 AM GMT
    maybe u still looking for ur sex orientation, so you can be enjoyed sex to man or woman, but u must know in fact sex orientation just two straight or gay, not bi,
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    May 06, 2010 4:43 AM GMT
    demonicius saidmaybe u still looking for ur sex orientation, so you can be enjoyed sex to man or woman, but u must know in fact sex orientation just two straight or gay, not bi,


    Oh, I'm going to disagree with you, young man. icon_wink.gif

    Look at this, see the top? It's black and we'll call that straight. We'll call the bottom gay. Everything else between are shades of sexuality, and yes orientation. I think there are more degrees (shades) of bisexuality than gay orientation.

    -Doug

    grey.jpg
  • blueswinger

    Posts: 4

    May 06, 2010 5:11 AM GMT
    Oh, I'm going to disagree with you, young man. icon_wink.gif

    Look at this, see the top? It's black and we'll call that straight. We'll call the bottom gay. Everything else between are shades of sexuality, and yes orientation. I think there are more degrees (shades) of bisexuality than gay orientation.

    -Doug

    I couldn't agree more
  • blueswinger

    Posts: 4

    May 06, 2010 5:11 AM GMT
    Hey thanks for all the advice,it really meant alot. I couldn't talk it out anywhere else, because no one would understand and they start putting stereotypes . but its deffinitely good to know there's someone out there that understands
  • demonicius

    Posts: 26

    May 06, 2010 5:53 AM GMT
    blueswinger said Oh, I'm going to disagree with you, young man. icon_wink.gif

    Look at this, see the top? It's black and we'll call that straight. We'll call the bottom gay. Everything else between are shades of sexuality, and yes orientation. I think there are more degrees (shades) of bisexuality than gay orientation.

    -Doug

    I couldn't agree more


    maybe u right , but he can choose to become gay or straight in reality bisexuality its wrong, why cause u can live between man or woman, this my opinion if i am wrong or nonsense iam apology, i am still 20 n i am little bit confse with gayness
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    May 06, 2010 1:52 PM GMT

    That's more than OK demonicius, and welcome to Realjock.

    You can't choose to be straight or gay. Bisexual behaviour just makes it appear that way.


    -Doug
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    May 06, 2010 10:41 PM GMT
    blueswinger saidHey, so it's been awhile i had this confusion since i was 14.
    I feel attracted to guys sexually ,but thats about it .i could never imagine myself going out, holding hands with them.

    There was this one period of time, where my girlfriend hurted me real bad, and after me and my bestfriend we went out to drink.

    we all got drunk and the next thing you know, i'm making my moves on him, he was rejecting it at 1st, but then he gave in, we just wank each other off, but as times goes on, we started sucking each other off 2. We never fucked thou, because i think that crosses the boundaries.
    We only do this kinda stuff, when we're drunk and when there's no girl around.
    we never ever talk or mentioned about it the next day.
    That was about a year ago. We don't do it anymore, because i've a girlfriend, and so does he. .

    I enjoy having sex, and beeing around hot gorgeous women but at the same time, i also think about hot guys.. masculine guys, not the feminine guys.
    I really don't want to think that i'm gay, because i enjoy girls 2, and i want to have relationship with them.
    and i keep telling myself that this is just a "confuse phase" of life and i'll get through it.

    Am i just confuse? i don't know. .. Anyone out there that use to like girls 2 .
    Well i'm hoping someone could help


    The plot line of every gay porn scene ever made icon_rolleyes.gif
  • BlackBeltGuy

    Posts: 2609

    May 06, 2010 10:57 PM GMT
    gay. it will take time.
  • BIG_N_TALL

    Posts: 2190

    May 06, 2010 11:09 PM GMT
    It's sounds like you are bisexual. There are varying degrees of bisexuality... as in how much more or less you are attracted to men or women. Society tends to see everything as being one or the other, when in reality it is nothing like that. I think everyone is bisexual to a degree - it just depends on whether you want to admit it or not. Admitting you are bi doesn't demean your value one way or another. I know a lot bi guys who like women and masculine men... effeminate men don't really "do it" for them. You are who you are... and there is nothing wrong with it. icon_smile.gif Take a look at the Kinsey scale and see where you fall in. I guess this is just an extension of what Doug said...

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scale
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    May 07, 2010 12:14 AM GMT
    ♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦ this is just my opinion so dont get mad,for me their is no being bi,you either like pussy or cock♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦I think when someone is bi they are confused or scared to admit they are GAY so they say they there bi cause being bi is not that bad cause you like women and men not just men and people are not gonna tell you something,so for me you are gay and its going to take time for you to accept it,I know alot of guys who have fucked girls and in the end they are GAY♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦

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    May 07, 2010 12:23 AM GMT
    BELLO said♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦ this is just my opinion so dont get mad,for me their is no being bi,you either like pussy or cock♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦I think when someone is bi they are confused or scared to admit they are GAY so they say they there bi cause being bi is not that bad cause you like women and men not just men and people are not gonna tell you something,so for me you are gay and its going to take time for you to accept it,I know alot of guys who have fucked girls and in the end they are GAY♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦♥♦



    i think it is definitely possible to be bi and its understandable that it might be hard to understand if you're strictly straight or gay... but telling somebody that they aren't bi when they feel that they are is really no different than if somebody was to tell you that you're not gay and just confused.

    to the original poster... I understand where you're coming from and its always a good idea to talk things out with other people, but you're asking a question that only you can answer. Nobody can tell you if your bi, straight, or gay. It's something that you'll have to figure out on your own.

    P.S. I do agree with you Bello that there are definitely men who say they are bi because it makes them feel better, but i do believe there is such thing as a true bisexual.
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    May 07, 2010 12:36 AM GMT
    I think your fine...it may seem your confused but that is just life. Some people despise the relationship aspect of the opposite sex and therefore likes the companionship of being with the same sex. And therefore that close companionship can lead to some sexual attraction and neither party wants to admit it. Thus your situation because of you and your friend. If any Str8 guys states that he has never checked out another guy (mostly for looks)....their telling a bold faced lie. Its alright to be confused and you may never get rid of the confusion, but for now...your bi until further notice (which may never come). I can relate to your situation because often times I find myself confused. I like both women and men, thus I am bi no matter what others say. I am attracted to men and women both sexually and for their looks. As long as your confident in yourself and what you like/dislike, everything will be okay. Its your life, you live it!
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    May 07, 2010 12:41 AM GMT
    OK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?
  • BIG_N_TALL

    Posts: 2190

    May 07, 2010 12:44 AM GMT
    Red_Vespa saidOK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?


    That was uncalled for... icon_neutral.gif
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    May 07, 2010 12:48 AM GMT
    Red_Vespa saidOK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?


    HAHA exactly my point,,thank you..
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    May 07, 2010 12:49 AM GMT
    RYAN_SC said
    Red_Vespa saidOK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?

    That was uncalled for... icon_neutral.gif

    It was perfectly appropriate. Either a man knows what he is, or he doesn't. Forcing a lot of drama on us because of self-ignorance is a waste of our time.
  • BIG_N_TALL

    Posts: 2190

    May 07, 2010 12:56 AM GMT
    Red_Vespa said
    RYAN_SC said
    Red_Vespa saidOK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?

    That was uncalled for... icon_neutral.gif

    It was perfectly appropriate. Either a man knows what he is, or he doesn't. Forcing a lot of drama on us because of self-ignorance is a waste of our time.


    I don't think he forced anything on you - he just asked a question... you answered the thread. It's a valid question, and it is obviously important to him. Like you said, I am not into drama... and that is why I am not going to respond to this comment again.
  • curve

    Posts: 668

    May 07, 2010 12:56 AM GMT
    blueswinger said Oh, I'm going to disagree with you, young man. icon_wink.gif

    Look at this, see the top? It's black and we'll call that straight. We'll call the bottom gay. Everything else between are shades of sexuality, and yes orientation. I think there are more degrees (shades) of bisexuality than gay orientation.

    -Doug

    I couldn't agree more



    do some research... it's all out there. There are proven degrees of sexuality, Ever heard of the Kinsey Scale? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kinsey_scale
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    May 07, 2010 12:57 AM GMT
    Red_Vespa said
    RYAN_SC said
    Red_Vespa saidOK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?

    That was uncalled for... icon_neutral.gif

    It was perfectly appropriate. Either a man knows what he is, or he doesn't. Forcing a lot of drama on us because of self-ignorance is a waste of our time.


    the guy is looking to talk with people and help figure out who he is... I dont know why that seems to be drama to you. And if its such a waste of time, perhaps you should stop replying to the thread then.
  • curve

    Posts: 668

    May 07, 2010 12:59 AM GMT
    YoungJock4 said
    Red_Vespa said
    RYAN_SC said
    Red_Vespa saidOK, I'm gonna use a crudity we had in the Army: shit or get off the pot.

    Either you're gay, or you're not. Your drama about it is not of interest to me

    So make up your fucking mind, and get back to us when you decide you are gay, because this is a gay site. Until then, do go away. We'll welcome you as a gay, but don't bother us as a wanna-be. Fair enough?

    That was uncalled for... icon_neutral.gif

    It was perfectly appropriate. Either a man knows what he is, or he doesn't. Forcing a lot of drama on us because of self-ignorance is a waste of our time.


    the guy is looking to talk with people and help figure out who he is... I dont know why that seems to be drama to you. And if its such a waste of time, perhaps you should stop replying to the thread then.



    Gentlemen: Life is a journey and process... not everything fits into nice little boxes and categories... this chap needs to experiement, shed the stereotypes and be honest with himself of what works... and doesn't for him...
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    May 07, 2010 1:21 AM GMT
    KARATE1974 saidgay. it will take time.


    THIS