May 12, 2010 9:12 AM GMT
I was surfing the forums and came across an old thread about romance: http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/7610
I count myself as one who believes in romance and a solid, long lasting relationship. But the cynical part of me tells me that I will probably end up alone because I focus on that too much. Many of my friends (both straight and gay) appear to forgo the possibility of this happening to them, or perhaps think the likelihood is so small it's useless to put much effort into nurturing it. I have a friend who sleeps around a lot, and he tells me he would not deprive himself of the pleasure of random hookups while he's waiting/searching for that one guy who will give him that long term thing. I don't begrudge him for holding that view, but it does make me wonder if it's possible to put in effort in building a successful relationship with someone else if one is after instant gratification all the time.
This is one aspect we don't hear about often--how two people keep the spark and the flame going, from courtship to a lasting commitment to one another. Perhaps many people don't believe in it anymore, because we see so little of it, don't have any role models, and thus have no way of learning. And I think same-sex relationships suffer more from this because there are many examples of opposite-sex romance stories in our media and our culture, even if some of them seem a tad cheesy and idealistic. However, I'm not saying that same-sex romance is necessarily like what's depicted in chick flicks and the like. I, for one, think it's incredibly romantic if a guy surprises me with a pair of ice-side, center ice hockey tickets.
The main point of my rambling introduction above is this: I hope some of you will share with the rest your experiences with romance. I'm talking about love here--the intense feeling of deep romantic affection and attachment for someone--not the feelings of lust where a random hot guy makes you want to bend him over (or bend over), though that can be counted if it's a part of a relationship that you at some point thought might go somewhere.
What have you done or what has a guy done for you that has ignited or reinvigorated the spark between you two? Was it some sweet somethings whispered in someone's ear as you woke up, was it a cuddle by the fire on a cold winter night, was it a big juicy burger and fries waiting for you as you came home from work? It could something as simple as declaring your love and asking him to spend the rest of his life with you. Please share your stories. I'm hoping to hear from the LTR gurus like kansan, red_vespa, Bill and Doug and all the others I hope will forgive me for not mentioning. I know I'm ambitious but this could be a digital record of stories, experiences and anecdotes I think will help many people, myself included. Thanks in advance and I look forward to reading all of it.
I count myself as one who believes in romance and a solid, long lasting relationship. But the cynical part of me tells me that I will probably end up alone because I focus on that too much. Many of my friends (both straight and gay) appear to forgo the possibility of this happening to them, or perhaps think the likelihood is so small it's useless to put much effort into nurturing it. I have a friend who sleeps around a lot, and he tells me he would not deprive himself of the pleasure of random hookups while he's waiting/searching for that one guy who will give him that long term thing. I don't begrudge him for holding that view, but it does make me wonder if it's possible to put in effort in building a successful relationship with someone else if one is after instant gratification all the time.
This is one aspect we don't hear about often--how two people keep the spark and the flame going, from courtship to a lasting commitment to one another. Perhaps many people don't believe in it anymore, because we see so little of it, don't have any role models, and thus have no way of learning. And I think same-sex relationships suffer more from this because there are many examples of opposite-sex romance stories in our media and our culture, even if some of them seem a tad cheesy and idealistic. However, I'm not saying that same-sex romance is necessarily like what's depicted in chick flicks and the like. I, for one, think it's incredibly romantic if a guy surprises me with a pair of ice-side, center ice hockey tickets.
The main point of my rambling introduction above is this: I hope some of you will share with the rest your experiences with romance. I'm talking about love here--the intense feeling of deep romantic affection and attachment for someone--not the feelings of lust where a random hot guy makes you want to bend him over (or bend over), though that can be counted if it's a part of a relationship that you at some point thought might go somewhere.
What have you done or what has a guy done for you that has ignited or reinvigorated the spark between you two? Was it some sweet somethings whispered in someone's ear as you woke up, was it a cuddle by the fire on a cold winter night, was it a big juicy burger and fries waiting for you as you came home from work? It could something as simple as declaring your love and asking him to spend the rest of his life with you. Please share your stories. I'm hoping to hear from the LTR gurus like kansan, red_vespa, Bill and Doug and all the others I hope will forgive me for not mentioning. I know I'm ambitious but this could be a digital record of stories, experiences and anecdotes I think will help many people, myself included. Thanks in advance and I look forward to reading all of it.
..Not for the Fain of Heart, I can assure that 
