JacobWoods saidI am just a really introverted person.
Would you believe I am, too? I've been painfully shy all my life. Here's what I've done to overcome it:
First, I joined the Army (for different reasons than we're discussing here). I was quickly chosen to be a leader, and forced to publicly address groups of soldiers. It helps when you are ordered to do something, upon pain of reprimand and even punishment if you fail, and you don't have any other option. It's a sink-or-swim situation.
But even then, I remained shy in my private life. It wasn't until I came out that I learned something new to overcome my social timidity.
My second tactic was to use other guys as my crutch, men who were social butterflies. I avoided dating guys who were wallflowers like me, but instead chose the extroverts, hoping they might be interested in me, though many were not.
Because I hold that the best relationships aren't about copying each other, but in complimenting. The ideal partnership, in my view, is not just about having similar interests, but in possessing dissimilar abilities, that nevertheless compliment each other.
So that you should both enjoy the same TV shows, and movies, and music, and food, etc, for the most part, but you each have unique abilities you bring with you. Meaning that together you make a team, that possesses the whole spectrum of skills necessary to confront life in our modern world.
I truly believe that in gay relationships, the sum is greater than the parts. And that is the basis for a lasting & stable partnership.
So that if you are prone to social shortcomings, like me, then you find a guy who is a social tiger. And ideally, that you bring some things to the relationship that he lacks. This is what makes you a team, this is what makes you partners. Mutual interdependence is not a bad thing, in my view, but rather it's the foundation for a lasting and loving relationship.