Wisdom

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    May 15, 2010 4:12 PM GMT
    I would like to offer some wisdom ,to those who read this, about relationships.
    I've been in a monogamos relationship for 12 years now.
    My man is slightly older than I.
    Not that age worries me.
    But I say the secret to keeping a relationship going, is keeping
    your partner satisfied in the bedroom.

    I often find myself wishing for some intamacy from my man.
    But when we hit the bed. It's only minutes before he is asleep.
    Sometimes, I caress and fondle him until he's woken, and then something happens.
    Mostly, I'm left dissapointed and wanting to be caressed and turned on for a change.
    Why am I still here??
    I'm committed. I love my man.
    We have never had any affairs.
    Once, have I relieved a man in the gym shower.
    Sure, I've been tempted many times,but have not gone there.
    Foreplay from my man is a few carresses up my chest,a quick fondle then roll me over and on top.
    When he wants it. I'm expected to be up and ready. I would like a bit more foreplay first.
    Sure. We've talked about all this.
    Things go good for a while but then falls back to how it was.
    "I can't change" is the response.
    Oh well that's just how it is then.
    Iv just came home from a wedding and could tell by the murmerings from some. That this is so even in the hetro group.

    So, my advice is. Satisfy your man. Be satisfied also.
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    May 15, 2010 5:10 PM GMT
    Thanks for posting…have you had the open relationship conversation yet?
    Yes, I feel most long term couples (gay/straight) fall into this cycle—it is work; hard work.
    I find it interesting how people are willing to put in the work when it comes to their body and job but let the relationship get out of shape.
    In my relationship we try to have Train-wreak sex (quoted from easily distracted) at least once a month. Other than that it is ask and receive communication. I know I’m a lucky man.
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    May 15, 2010 5:46 PM GMT
    Man, 12 years? I need to be taking more advice from you and not the other way around...
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    May 15, 2010 7:20 PM GMT


    ...hard work. Well, yes and no. We never do each other out of obligation or schedule. That's what the hand is for. No pressure of each other to perform, which can be a real boner killer and romantic flat tire. We learned this from past relationships. It's worth waiting for the genuine, which really is where it's at. So, how does the genuine happen often enough to keep both guys happy?

    Courting; you did it when you met, so why should it stop? Remembering what you first saw in each other and how you behaved is a worthwhile trip down memory lane. It's necessary for both guys to do this. And THIS is where the hard work comes in. Many guys and gals just shrug it off to a honeymoon phase and often we hear 'that part is over, it's changed now.' but really it doesn't have to be. Of course there's familiarity, and thrill of the unknown gone, but that should make depth easier and experimentation with each other easier too.

    lol, I remember being in a bar in '99 and some guy behind me in line for drinks thought he'd help out and told me that a guy was checking me out, 'with a boner' he hissed. I looked.

    "That's my husband of ten years." I said, feeling like I was going to burst with pleasure.

    -Doug
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    May 15, 2010 10:49 PM GMT
    Thanks guys.
    An open relationship is a dffinate no.
    My partner has had previous relationships and have had x3s.
    That is a no now, for him.
    I've never tried it. More of a 1x1 man.
    Yes,I also feel that the honeymoon shouldn't end.
    But this having to" ask for it "has grey hairs on it.
    This should come natural. ???
    Well it does for me, to please my man.

    Yes I also realize relationships take work and commitment.
    It had been said a few times now, I need to go and explore.
    But this would mean we split.
    I've replied 'i don't need to go out and explore,
    if I get it at home' and be treated as I ask.

    Thanks guys.
    Love and hugs.

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    May 16, 2010 1:07 AM GMT
    This is appropropriate, considering differences.

    "I've replied 'i don't need to go out and explore,
    if I get it at home' and be treated as I ask."

    As well, there's that saying, 'If you don't do it, someone else may.'

    xo -Doug