Is skinny/lean considered to be looked down upon as far as "fitness" goes?

  • KnuxNole

    Posts: 219

    Jun 10, 2010 7:58 PM GMT
    I kinda got this question answered before elsewhere, but I figured in a fitness forum, maybe some more answers wouldn't hurt icon_biggrin.gif

    It's something I hear a lot as far as guys go: "I'm skinny, I really need to bulk up!" or "I used to be a skinny kid, now look at me!". It makes it seem like someone who is lean is considered a bad thing. There seems to be a pressure to bulk up to gain muscles and all that.

    I value fitness(which I why I like to check this site out for advice), but as far as my body goes, I'm a skinny guy. I don't have that much muscle on me, but I have a healthy weight, work out about 3-4 times a week jogging, swimming, recently starting bike riding with nice weather, etc. It seems like on the internet, that people assume that if you're not muscular or buff, you are not good enough as far as sports or not masculine in personality. That is far from the truth...it's just a natural body type and I've always been known to be the speedy stamina dude.

    I respect those would enjoy bodybuilding and lifting and stuff, but I feel like if you don't enjoy that, people don't think you're fit or assume you're not athletic. While looking through this website, I tend to notice there are a huge amount of muscled and ripped guys, and I felt like the only slim guy here lol. I love sports and exercising, but I feel like there is no need to lift weights or eat so many calories. It's benefical or an awesome goal for some, but pointless for others since it has no benefits for my everyday life.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Jun 10, 2010 8:22 PM GMT
    I see nothing wrong with being slender and athletic, it all depends on what sports and activities you like to do.
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    Jun 10, 2010 9:05 PM GMT
    You aren't the only 'skinny' dude here.. trust me! and yes I prefer being called "slim"!
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    Jun 10, 2010 9:16 PM GMT
    It depends on what sports your into. I expect a certain size from guys that claim to be "jocks" into weightlifting/bodybuilding/rugby/wrestling and other power sports.

    It also depends on what age you are too, I have a lot of respect for 30 year old marathon swimmers/runners/cyclists/gymnasts... but yeah I will look down upon the 18 year olds that have a lean athletic body because they haven't yet drunk it away yet and expect me to fall head over heels because they gottz the abz icon_rolleyes.gif


    just because someone has different goals from me, or is of an intentional body type I wouldn't choose for myself doesn't mean I look down upon them as an athlete....
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    Jun 10, 2010 9:51 PM GMT
    In my view...
    Skinny and tight (aka Lean): Hot
    Skinny and soft (aka Skinny-fat): Not

    Basically, if you have muscle definition, regardless of size, I think it looks good. If you just have sticks for arms with no shape to them, it's a turn off.
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    Jun 10, 2010 9:59 PM GMT
    I don't look down on lean/compact guys. Personally, I have the type of body that puts on muscle easily but I sometimes envy my workout buddy's ability for endurance as compared to my ability for generating strength. Sure, we have a decent gap in strength when it comes to weight lifting but he can run for miles and miles like it's nothing. I can barely run two miles without getting winded so I think feats of endurance like that are amazing.


    EDIT: Ditto what Paul said. As long as you look fit, whether it's an endurance fit to a strength/muscle fit, I think it's fine. It's when you don't posses any athleticism at all that I tend to look "down" at a guy. Just because, for me, a guy's fitness level for reflects, to some degree, the amount of discipline they must have to maintain their form. Sure, you can have discipline without being physically fit but being physically fit is a good way to gauge that visually.
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    Jun 10, 2010 11:13 PM GMT
    your fitness goals should be your own, and not what someone else says or thinks you "should" look like.
  • bkjhebert

    Posts: 40

    Jun 11, 2010 1:02 AM GMT
    I agree with paulflexes. "Basically, if you have muscle definition, regardless of size, I think it looks good. If you just have sticks for arms with no shape to them, it's a turn off." Make the best of what you've been given. Don't worry about the rest!
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Jun 11, 2010 1:09 AM GMT
    I work with a chic who is in the hospital now because she never eats, thinking that she is too fat. She looks like a skeleton with skin. Having a lot of muscle or having little muscle are both healthy alternatives. They are both attractive to somebody. You don't need to be muscley to be hot. When you're thin because you have so little body fat that your internal organs are not protected by the fat that mother nature put there to protect them, like shock absorbers, then you could have a problem. What is your body fat percentage?
  • joncfernan

    Posts: 216

    Jun 11, 2010 1:24 AM GMT
    I admire really muscular men. Its amazing how some of them manage to pack on muscle ON muscle haha. But I also see definite beauty in Lean men as well. Everyone is right - work with what you got. I believe every body type is beautiful as long as you're promoting your health - may that be strength or cardiovascular.
  • Moishendlishu...

    Posts: 435

    Jun 11, 2010 1:26 AM GMT
    Funny you should ask this. I feel that way all the time. I'm a TALL dude, but have always been ridiculously skinny. It's taken 3 years of consistent working out and heavy calories to get where I am now, and still don't feel like I'm big enough. Want to be about 220. Funny thing is, I have more muscle on me then most people I know, even if they are bigger.

    I think when it comes to the gym and muscles, being lean is def looked down on. The assumption is twinky or feminine when someone is slim which isn't always the case. Strength is also not something you can gage based on mass.
  • coastguy90814

    Posts: 661

    Jun 11, 2010 1:30 AM GMT
    Interesting points but you seem to sway from one end of the spectrum to the other...either skinny lean to buff and muscular. There is something in between and that's having good muscle tone and definition, maybe a little bulk...ha ha. I happen to have tons of stamina when it comes to sports or excercise and I don't consider myself skinny so having muscle doesn't slow you down ;-)

    I think one reason being skinny or lean is not admired like someone that is buff, or has muscle tone is because most people know the dedication it takes physically and nutrtionally to get into that type of shape so it's probably not so much you're looked down on but rather people in general are more turned on by the other.

    It's important to look down the road as well, although you seem to be naturally thin, based off what you said, having muscle tone and lean muscle is GREAT for the metabolism (your metabolism works more efficiently with muscle) so when you're in your 30's, 40's, 50's etc; you'll have your metabolism at it's best, so it's doesn't hurt to start good practices now.
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    Jun 11, 2010 1:36 AM GMT
    maxjf saidyour fitness goals should be your own, and not what someone else says or thinks you "should" look like.


    Amen brotha icon_idea.gif
  • comical44

    Posts: 723

    Jun 11, 2010 1:52 AM GMT
    *****Heres a question:

    Do More muscular guys find smaller athletic guys attractive? Like could they be in a LTR with them or do bigger/buffer guys just check out other muscular guys?

    Sometimes I feel like Because im not ripped that a bigger guy will overlook me and miss out on my personality
  • KnuxNole

    Posts: 219

    Jun 11, 2010 1:59 AM GMT
    Great responses! Yeah, I do agree that my fitness goals should be my own. As far as sports goes, I love soccer and tennis, and I love to surf. I like to play other sports casually too, but those three are ones that I greatly enjoy partaking in. I guess I shouldn't have used the skinny/buff as the extremes, yes it's true, you definitely can both be muscular + have a lot of endurance. icon_wink.gif

    Last time I checked, my body fat % was around 9-10%, which I assume is on the low side.

    As far as the assumption that slim = feminine, how common is that with other gays? I've never really seemed to get that from other people, but I don't really know that many gays in person, so I am not too knowledgeable on all that. I don't define myself as strictly a masculine/feminine person, but the way I act, my character, and interests mostly lean on the masculine side. Not saying it's wrong for someone to assume a feminine character, but it would kinda suck to get a false impression based on a body type. It seems on sites guys say "masculine guys" or "no femmes" as dating traits, and it would be a bummer for someone to shun me away for wrongly guessing something like that.

    One last thing, to one of the last posters, yeah, it does seem like a good idea to at least do some muscle training, but I guess I am a bit clueless on what to do. Personally, the eating a bunch of calories is the hardest part. I don't mind lifting dumbells to tone biceps and such, but I can't seem to eat excessive amounts of food that a lot of people claim you must do. Plus, due to being a poor student, food isn't always plentiful.
  • sage_fire01

    Posts: 15

    Jun 11, 2010 2:01 AM GMT
    I guess this goes both ways doesn't it. If you are overweight, which I currently am, you are not looked at favorably and thus you must loose weight and gain muscle to look like what is considered handsome. So overly skinny or slim people are the same, they have to gain weight in muscle so that they can fit the "norm". Sucks, but it seems to be the message society always sends
  • KnuxNole

    Posts: 219

    Jun 11, 2010 2:02 AM GMT
    lol, that's another thing. I am attracted to muscular guys, and a small part of me feels like muscular guys only date other muscle guys or wouldn't consider a slim guy as a partner. My attraction isn't only limited to that, but just saying. I read on another site saying that muscular guys expect their partners to also be muscular...and I wouldn't want to be in a relationship where a boyfriend won't date me if I don't lift and bulk.
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    Jun 11, 2010 2:24 AM GMT
    seems like youre attracted to something that you cant become and are now constructing evidence of why you cant become like that and hoping you can convince yourself more than others.

    stop thinking, and just masturbate.
  • coastguy90814

    Posts: 661

    Jun 11, 2010 2:25 AM GMT
    KnuxNole saidGreat responses! Yeah, I do agree that my fitness goals should be my own. As far as sports goes, I love soccer and tennis, and I love to surf. I like to play other sports casually too, but those three are ones that I greatly enjoy partaking in. I guess I shouldn't have used the skinny/buff as the extremes, yes it's true, you definitely can both be muscular + have a lot of endurance. icon_wink.gif

    Last time I checked, my body fat % was around 9-10%, which I assume is on the low side.

    As far as the assumption that slim = feminine, how common is that with other gays? I've never really seemed to get that from other people, but I don't really know that many gays in person, so I am not too knowledgeable on all that. I don't define myself as strictly a masculine/feminine person, but the way I act, my character, and interests mostly lean on the masculine side. Not saying it's wrong for someone to assume a feminine character, but it would kinda suck to get a false impression based on a body type. It seems on sites guys say "masculine guys" or "no femmes" as dating traits, and it would be a bummer for someone to shun me away for wrongly guessing something like that.

    One last thing, to one of the last posters, yeah, it does seem like a good idea to at least do some muscle training, but I guess I am a bit clueless on what to do. Personally, the eating a bunch of calories is the hardest part. I don't mind lifting dumbells to tone biceps and such, but I can't seem to eat excessive amounts of food that a lot of people claim you must do. Plus, due to being a poor student, food isn't always plentiful.


    All you have to do is be consistent with your weight training, use moderate weight or your body weight if you dont want to bulk up to much but rather put on some lean muscle and definition. You do not have to eat tons of calories but it is very important to take some sort of protein within 30 minutes after your weight work out, this is when your muscles need the protein to grow. Good luck man, if you have any specific questions, just send me an e-mail.
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    Jun 11, 2010 2:35 AM GMT
    ..I hear you but you know what I was told when I was in my 20s looking like a waif that big muscular men look for other big muscular men. well I went out to lift and gain muscle working hard to get it all in my 30's. Finally I got it the size the definition and still I was passed up by the ones I thought I would get! Im in my 50s now, working hard to maintain what I got in my30's and holding my own but the men coming after me now are the ones that looked like me when I was in my 20's.

    Don't get me wrong...I love LOVE big men but I have learned that the smaller fire plug, the one w/the tight muscle gymnastic prose, the shorter symmetrical strong fireman or country boy who can bend me like origami, fuck my brains out like no tomorrow who WANTS ME is just as if not better than the ones I've been wishing for all my life. May you find that ONE that satisfies you despite the outside package.
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    Jun 11, 2010 2:38 AM GMT
    I enjoy being lean. I plan on staying this way as long as possible. I get plenty of attention without glamor muscles. But I also like lean guys too, so I do not have the desire to bulk up. And I'm an avid cyclist. I ride 15 miles a day to get around DC. It's also a consequence of my lifestyle.
  • mybud

    Posts: 11819

    Jun 11, 2010 2:48 AM GMT
    Lean and skinny are two different things....You can be 200 pounds and be lean.....but skinny is skinny...usually means your skin and bone without noticeable muscle mass
  • KnuxNole

    Posts: 219

    Jun 11, 2010 2:53 AM GMT
    TheIStrat saidI enjoy being lean. I plan on staying this way as long as possible. I get plenty of attention without glamor muscles. But I also like lean guys too, so I do not have the desire to bulk up. And I'm an avid cyclist. I ride 15 miles a day to get around DC. It's also a consequence of my lifestyle.


    Yea, I also think other lean guys are quite hot icon_biggrin.gif

    I wouldn't change my body for someone else though...I am happy with what I am. But, I would consider some muscle training for personal fitness, since improving myself health wise >>>>> doing something to please others
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    Jun 11, 2010 4:25 AM GMT
    . . . skinny/lean is a classic male archetype, and a beautiful one . . . .

    . . . ectomorphs are the borzois of the gay world . . .
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    Jun 11, 2010 5:39 AM GMT
    I think it's just cultural and depends on your scene. Skinny guys rock the fashion/music/art scenes in Europe and Asia. Although muscles are still sexy, I know places where being anything but lean is very looked down upon, mostly because the pursuit of muscles is considered ridiculous... but in those places, supplements are more difficult to come by and the diet needed to maintain muscles that you wouldn't carry naturally is so expensive that you'd have to sacrifice every other aspect of your life just to maintain your physique.