I need some advise..

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2008 12:50 AM GMT
    2 weeks ago i came out to my parents, everything seemed to go well, they were loving and caring and told me they were surprised but on time they will accept it completely.

    The problem is.. my mom just told me that she felt awful, and couldn't accept the fact that im gay no matter how hard she tried. (my mom is a incredible person.. she always shows support, she has done everything for us, and we really admire her.)

    She asked me the cause of my homosexuality, since when i am like this, if someone influenced my decision, etc...

    of course i told her that i'm gay since i have awareness of myself. This is how i am and how i will be.

    But i feel she's still worried.. she might feel responsible and i want to help her more...

    the question is: how can i do that?, is there a good book i can give her?.. or on time she will accept it?

  • Timbales

    Posts: 13999

    May 02, 2008 12:53 AM GMT
    There is a group called PFLAG that may have information that can help.

    Just assure her that you are who you are, and she did nothing wrong. You can understand that this is probably not what she was expecting, but that you are still the same person.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 02, 2008 11:56 AM GMT
    There is no scientific evidence that pins "gayness" to the fault of either the mother or father. The best research we currently have posits that sexual orientation is a complex multicausal phenotype based on both genetic and environmental effects.

    It's important that your mother knows it isn't her "fault". And you should know that it isn't your "fault" either. You are who you are and there is no mistake or error that made you like this. You are still your mother's son.
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    May 02, 2008 10:44 PM GMT
    I was also thinking about PFLAG. Here is a similar organization in Mexico that might help.

    Familias Por La Diversidad Sexual
    Grupo Condesa
    52 11 8250

    I got that from this site: http://community.pflag.org/NETCOMMUNITY/Page.aspx?pid=752&srcid=478
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    May 04, 2008 12:15 PM GMT
    It's perfectly natural that your Mom or Dad might feel responsible
    Groups might help if your Mom is willing to go
    and I don't know of any books
    but just live your life and show her that you are the same loving son that you always have been and she will see fairly soon that nothing has really changed