And on this NYE, I'm contemplating a break up. :(

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 5:54 PM GMT
    I'm fascinated by people who get into this situation... No sex for a year? Really? If I had gone a week without having sex with my boyfriend, I'd have been asking what was wrong.

    Any relationship where physical intimacy isn't happening is a relationship in serious, serious danger. It doesn't matter how much you love them, how much you want to be understanding and sensitive and above physical things... Sex is a vital part of a romantic relationship and people who think you can have a steady, to say nothing of healthy, relationship but somehow not have sex are fooling themselves.

    There's nothing noble about thinking you're above the sex: it's a recipe for disaster.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:05 PM GMT
    Larkin saidI'm fascinated by people who get into this situation... No sex for a year? Really? If I had gone a week without having sex with my boyfriend, I'd have been asking what was wrong.

    Any relationship where physical intimacy isn't happening is a relationship in serious, serious danger. It doesn't matter how much you love them, how much you want to be understanding and sensitive and above physical things... Sex is a vital part of a romantic relationship and people who think you can have a steady, to say nothing of healthy, relationship but somehow not have sex are fooling themselves.

    There's nothing noble about thinking you're above the sex: it's a recipe for disaster.




    tumblr_lw6arhTEIR1qeb4in.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:16 PM GMT

    Larkin said, "Any relationship where physical intimacy isn't happening is a relationship in serious, serious danger."

    I think it depends entirely on why the sex isn't happening. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:17 PM GMT
    This thread is 90% why I don't do relationships.
  • tuffguyndc

    Posts: 4437

    Jan 01, 2012 6:20 PM GMT
    AlphaTrigger saidThis thread is 90% why I don't do relationships.
    lol what's the other 10%?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:23 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    Larkin said, "Any relationship where physical intimacy isn't happening is a relationship in serious, serious danger."

    I think it depends entirely on why the sex isn't happening. icon_wink.gif


    And how the lack of sex is handled... Going a year without sex and feeling like a martyr about it is incredibly dangerous to the long term health of the relationship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:26 PM GMT
    tuffguyndc said
    AlphaTrigger saidThis thread is 90% why I don't do relationships.
    lol what's the other 10%?


    The joy of seeing Mr. Was Good Right Then exiting the door after we've had our fun. ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:26 PM GMT
    Age is not a big significance when you're 32. I'm 19 and flirted with an older woman last night at the club. For the record, yes I am bisexual, but that's not the point. The point that I'm trying to come across is that the age gap is merely a petty excuse to break up at this point. Look- you're going to have to talk to your boyfriend if you really do love him, or consider couples counseling because it seems like the passion is dead and you two are merely using each other for convenience, which happens to a lot of couples. See what you can do to spark your relationship back up because if you have the ability to get along like lovers rather than siblings, then see what you can do to take it to another level.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:34 PM GMT
    AlphaTrigger saidThis thread is 90% why I don't do relationships.
    Umm... I usually hear that from guys barely old enough to drink.

    If you observe the divorce rate situation worldwide, relationships require effort on both sides. They just don't present themselves with a bow all tied up nice and neat for anyone, straight or gay. Effort and sacrifices on your part are a requirement.

    Unless you live in an area of the world with a large number of single gays standing around, we just can't be ageists, especially for 5 years difference.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 6:35 PM GMT
    Larkin said
    meninlove said
    Larkin said, "Any relationship where physical intimacy isn't happening is a relationship in serious, serious danger."

    I think it depends entirely on why the sex isn't happening. icon_wink.gif


    And how the lack of sex is handled... Going a year without sex and feeling like a martyr about it is incredibly dangerous to the long term health of the relationship.

    This is very true. When we went through our first valley (and yes there are peaks and valleys, or tides that come in and go out if you will, it's natural) we talked about it immediately and shared completely. It's all part of being in synch with each other as lovers.

    -Doug

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 10:42 PM GMT
    I had the same thing happen to me in September 2010 when I broke up with my former boyfriend. I'd been with my boyfriend since May 2007, over three years. We were over 2 years apart in age and our relationship had morphed into something that I didn't like either. I had nothing against him at all as a person---I loved him dearly, but I realized that I was not IN LOVE with him. Sex was basically non-existent for a long time.

    We'd been through a lot together, especially in 2010---many tragedies in my own life and he was there all along to see me through everything. And yet, when things in my life were finally piecing back together, instead of feeling closer to him, I knew that it was time to move on. He felt the same way.

    We mutually chose to end the relationship and are still good friends today. You'll know what you need to do.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 01, 2012 10:46 PM GMT
    7Famark saidAgreed, do him a favor so he can find a better dude.


    +1