The Best Pick Up Lines

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  Jul 31, 2007 9:24 PM GMT

  Either ones you've used, or ones used on you. Please to also include if it worked.
  
  Mine:
  
  The Scene, a small gay bar in Tucson, AZ on a slow Wednesday Night.
  
  I was flirting with Seamus, a mid-30's, muscular bear of a man as he drank his whiskey on the rocks. I complimented his shaved head and full beard.
  
  "I like guys with shaved heads" I said.
  
  With an evil gleam in his eye, he asked plainly, "Do you like to take orders from guys with shaved head?"
  
  Turns out I do.
  
  
  Now its your turn.

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  Jul 31, 2007 9:50 PM GMT

  "Nice tits, luv!"
  
  So. Long. Ago.

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  Jul 31, 2007 10:46 PM GMT

  LOL to Crimthann and Tigertim.
  Hugh smile here! Thanks for that.

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  Jul 31, 2007 11:48 PM GMT

  "Yum Yum" worked on me once.
  
  The direct approach works too, "So are we going to have sex?"

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  Aug 01, 2007 1:09 AM GMT

  The only one I've ever used is "Hello" but I think this one is funny:
  
  "Do you want to fuck?"
  "NO!"
  "Well would you mind lying down while I have one?"

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• liftordie
  
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  Aug 01, 2007 3:11 AM GMT

  Back in the day when I still did 3 ways, a couple from Phoenix and I walked off the dance floor at Gipsy and the one guy turned to me and goes 'So, Mike, what are the chances of you going home with us tonight??' um pretty good I answered. Two days later I went home!!!

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  Aug 01, 2007 4:05 AM GMT

  I was at work, and my co-worker was talking about her friend who she thought was gay, but didn't know how to ask him. I told her I would since he was really cute.
  
  I asked him, "Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?"
  
  He said, "Yeah, sure."
  
  "Are you gay?"
  
  "Yes. Why do you ask?"
  
  "Oh, I just wanted to be sure before I asked you out."

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  Aug 01, 2007 4:09 AM GMT

  Whispered in a deep voice into the victim's ear:
  
  "I wanna make your butt sweat..."

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  Aug 01, 2007 4:18 AM GMT

  The most embarassing:
  
  I was walking across a parking lot with a friend to a bar. I heard my name called.
  
  This cute guy ran up to me. I didn't recognize him and said, "Sorry, but do I know you?"
  
  He replied: "No, but you've fucked me twice and I wondered if you'd like to do it again."

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  Aug 01, 2007 4:38 AM GMT

  Can't remember the guys you've penetrated OW? Are the streets of Atlanta so crowded with your cast off conquests?
  
  LOL

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  Aug 01, 2007 4:41 AM GMT

  It took me awhile to figure out that OW was short for obscenewish. I thought you were wincing in pain as you were posting--I know you have that fissure problem. :)

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  Aug 01, 2007 5:02 AM GMT

  I was once approached, "Are you the dancer tonight?"
  
  This was back when I was 40 lbs scrawnier. And it wasn't a gracefully recited line either, so I snarled back a simple "No".
  
  Then again I hate lines. If mutual flirting has happened, the most successful way to actually meet me is to simply be nice - say hello and introduce oneself.
  

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  Aug 01, 2007 5:17 AM GMT

  "Can't remember the guys you've penetrated OW? Are the streets of Atlanta so crowded with your cast off conquests?"
  
  It is definitely a memory problem unrelated to number.
  
  Hey, Italmusclebtm, isn't that the Atlanta skyline behind you?

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  Aug 01, 2007 6:29 AM GMT

  OW can you recognize their asses though?, or is that a memory problem as well?

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  Aug 01, 2007 6:35 AM GMT

  The best one I've ever used was "You look like you hate it here, too." Surprisngly effective, but only for cynics and alchoholics.
  
  A friend of mine hates it when people just walk up to him and introduce themselves. I always try something pithy...

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  Aug 01, 2007 8:20 AM GMT

  ok so I was working at a camp this summer...and we had a drag theme, and one of the contests was pick up lines. one pick up line was...
  
  "I have dictionary tattooed on my vagina, lets go to my house so I can put words in yo mouth."
  
  and the other one was...
  
  (a person is sitting down)
  
  ( a girl uses her finger to signal the person over)
  
  ( when the girl walks towards she says)
  
  " I told you I could make you come with one finger"
  
  
  LOL!
  
  
  That's it folks, thank you and goodnight!!!!

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  Aug 01, 2007 8:55 AM GMT

  I was at a community equality meeting representing the World Can't Wait, Drive out the Bush Regime. Towards the ending of the meeting the Democratic Party college outreach coordinator comes over to me, gives me his personal phone number and says, "Here is my number if you ever need it." Then as he walks away he runs his hand across my back.
  
  Sadly I was in a relationship at that time and get really shy in those situations.

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  Aug 01, 2007 9:28 AM GMT

  "My penis...
  
  I like that in a man."

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  Aug 01, 2007 2:48 PM GMT

  I just come back from a gay sauna. A good looking guy sit next to me. He smile , I smile
  
  Been here long?. Just got here. Where you come from..Come here often.....I dont get him though. Just not my type. (sour grape)

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  Aug 01, 2007 2:59 PM GMT

  Probably the best one that worked on me went like this in a club:
  
  Me - Well, do you want to dance some more?
  
  Him - No, not really.
  
  Me - What do you want to do?
  
  Him - Wake up next to you.
  
  And he did.

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  Aug 01, 2007 3:42 PM GMT

  Hmm... I almost never accost strangers.
  
  One line that's been used on me a few times this year: "Hey, you kinda look like my next ex-boyfriend!" It hasn't worked so far.
  
  It doesn't pay to be too subtle with me. Many times, I've realized hours or DAYS later that someone has made a pass at me.
  
  Strangely enough, one of the only times I remember introducing myself to a stranger sort of worked. During a large convention in New Orleans, I was at the Cafe du Monde with a friend. The place was packed and we were having difficulty juggling our coffee, beignets, and impedimenta while standing. I noticed an attractive young woman, alone at a table, reading the program from our convention. We made our way over and I asked her if there was anything interesting in the program for that afternoon, and could we share her table? In the end, we hired her as a post-doc, and she eventually married my friend.

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  Aug 01, 2007 4:01 PM GMT

  My most clueless experience:
  
  Grad school in Madison, Wisconsin. Having never been in a gay bar, my good friend, Michael, insists we must resolve this gross lapse in my coming out education, and he takes me to the Shamrock -- at that time a dingy, hole-in-the-wall -- just off Captial Square.
  
  Michael and I chat at the bar. A fellow comes up behind me and asks: "would you like to dance with me?" "No thank you," I say, "I'm talking with my friend. Thanks anyway."
  
  A minute or two passes. "Would you and your friend like to dance with me?" "No, really, thank you for asking, but we're just enjoying a drink. Thanks anyway."
  
  A minute later he taps me on the shoulder again: "Would you like to ..." but before he speak another word, Michael sets down his beer, turns to the guy and shouts: "LEAVE" The bar is suddenly dead silent and the fellow wanders off to the farther side of the room.
  
  Michael turns back to me and offered the best piece of advice, "Sometimes you need to be a little more direct with men."

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• liftordie
  
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  Aug 01, 2007 5:06 PM GMT

  mindgarden that is the best story!!!

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  Aug 01, 2007 5:31 PM GMT

  In the middle of a gay bar... "I couldn't help but wonder... are you straight?"
  
  Two things are possibly at play here:
  1. The guy really thinks I am straight, and therefore is a major idiot. I am in a gay bar that no straight man ever walks into, other than the eye candy bartenders.
  
  2. The guy thinks that he is somehow complimenting me.
  
  Point being, I do not see how the above leads into any kind of genuine conversation.
  
  One of the posters mentioned that "Hi, my name is..." doesn't work for a friend. HUH? I really do not understand some people.
  
  Be straightforward. Be genuine. A little cheese is ok as long as it's not demeaning.

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  Aug 01, 2007 5:44 PM GMT

  At my gym, I saw a cute Thai guy in trendy new Umbro shorts and Nike Climalite workout shirt, I complemented his outfit and said he looked nice as well. His card was offered and then he asked if I lived close by and do I have time to meet today (I had offered to have cofee sometime)
  That was yesterday and YES we went to my place.
  
  
  Sometimes the direct approach DOES work.

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