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Trainer in SF Bay Area with Benefits Wanted.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 07, 2012 6:03 PM GMT
    Looking for a trainer in Silicon Valley/San Francisco Need workout advice, diet etc, goal is to get into the low 180s. As well, benefits on the side would be great. Workout at 24 Fitness, Golds and other gyms if necessary. Please be serious, I am. I will pay for training and benefits. You: active, fit, trainer, bodybuilder with heavy sexual appetite :-).

    Thanks guys. Help me achieve my fitness dreams! Will trade pics upon request.
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    May 07, 2012 8:44 PM GMT
    So you want a prostitute who will count your reps.
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    May 07, 2012 9:00 PM GMT
    "Alright Mr. Johnson, now that I've broken down your basic macronutrient needs and outlined the first phase of your hypertrophic training routine, all thats left now is for you to drop your pants so I can fuck you and ejaculate on your face. Awww yeah...fuuuuck yeah...fuck yeah that's it....oh you know what Mr. Johnson, as I'm plowing you I notice you have a slight anterior pelvic tilt and winging of the scapulae, these postural deviations could potentially lead to severe joint and disc problems if you don't pay special attention to form during your workouts. Now turn around pig boy so I can shoot into your mouth".
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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 07, 2012 9:02 PM GMT
    Well this is going to go well ...
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    May 07, 2012 9:07 PM GMT
    daviddoublebay said
    Tenebrism saidWell this is going to go well ...


    I'm just still laughing at your comment icon_exclaim.gif (ow... my face hurts !)
    That's why I'm here. icon_biggrin.gif
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    May 07, 2012 9:14 PM GMT
    Ariodante said"Alright Mr. Johnson, now that I've broken down your basic macronutrient needs and outlined the first phase of your hypertrophic training routine, all thats left now is for you to drop your pants so I can fuck you and ejaculate on your face. Awww yeah...fuuuuck yeah...fuck yeah that's it....oh you know what Mr. Johnson, as I'm plowing you I notice you have a slight anterior pelvic tilt and winging of the scapulae, these postural deviations could potentially lead to severe joint and disc problems if you don't pay special attention to form during your workouts. Now turn around pig boy so I can shoot into your mouth".


    I've seen that movie
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    May 07, 2012 9:16 PM GMT
    Ariodante said"Alright Mr. Johnson, now that I've broken down your basic macronutrient needs and outlined the first phase of your hypertrophic training routine, all thats left now is for you to drop your pants so I can fuck you and ejaculate on your face. Awww yeah...fuuuuck yeah...fuck yeah that's it....oh you know what Mr. Johnson, as I'm plowing you I notice you have a slight anterior pelvic tilt and winging of the scapulae, these postural deviations could potentially lead to severe joint and disc problems if you don't pay special attention to form during your workouts. Now turn around pig boy so I can shoot into your mouth".


    As I was laughing my ass off, I didn't realize that my boss was standing over my shoulder reading this as well. Needless to say, he thought it was equally a hilarious!
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    May 07, 2012 9:23 PM GMT
    dafuq-did-i-just-read-meme.jpg
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    May 07, 2012 9:47 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidSo you want a prostitute who will count your reps.


    LOL
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    May 07, 2012 9:49 PM GMT
    Oh this thread could last a while, where's my popcorn?

    k6399796.jpg

    OK, carry on!
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    May 07, 2012 9:56 PM GMT
    Well, just like the "tennis coaches" ;) for kept wives.




    Believe it or not, I've gotten this proposition more than once. I don't work at a gym. wtf.
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    May 07, 2012 9:57 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidSo you want a prostitute who will count your reps.


    lol
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    May 07, 2012 10:03 PM GMT
    You're on the wrong site. Try rentboy.com.
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    May 07, 2012 10:05 PM GMT
    I just saw an ad yesterday for free housing in exchange for sex. Who would have ever guessed that sex is worth so much. Maybe this could help our economy.
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    May 08, 2012 7:48 AM GMT
    This is what happens when you watch too much porn, kids! You end up genuinely believing the pizza delivery boy and plumber are supposed to drop to their knees and suck you off upon arriving.
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    May 08, 2012 7:51 AM GMT
    Ariodante saidThis is what happens when you watch too much porn, kids! You end up genuinely believing the pizza delivery boy and plumber are supposed to drop to their knees and suck you off upon arriving.


    They're not???

    icon_eek.gif

    I thought all plumbers worked like this...

    plumber1030.jpg
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  • nv7_

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    May 08, 2012 7:51 AM GMT
    credo saidYou're on the wrong site. Try rentboy.com.


    ...that, and Craigslist. Oh my.
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    May 08, 2012 8:01 AM GMT
    Ariodante said"Alright Mr. Johnson, now that I've broken down your basic macronutrient needs and outlined the first phase of your hypertrophic training routine, all thats left now is for you to drop your pants so I can fuck you and ejaculate on your face. Awww yeah...fuuuuck yeah...fuck yeah that's it....oh you know what Mr. Johnson, as I'm plowing you I notice you have a slight anterior pelvic tilt and winging of the scapulae, these postural deviations could potentially lead to severe joint and disc problems if you don't pay special attention to form during your workouts. Now turn around pig boy so I can shoot into your mouth".


    We all need a personal trainer that will assist with our daily protein and liquid intake.
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    May 08, 2012 8:03 AM GMT
    onaquest said
    Ariodante saidThis is what happens when you watch too much porn, kids! You end up genuinely believing the pizza delivery boy and plumber are supposed to drop to their knees and suck you off upon arriving.


    They're not???

    icon_eek.gif

    I thought all plumbers worked like this...

    plumber1030.jpg


    Oh that they do. It's common for muscular, ripped plumbers to completely strip down naked while working. But that's just so pesky restrictive clothing won't get in the gay...I mean the way of them pumping their sinewy, sweating, defined muscles on those stubborn sink pipes.....mhmmm...

    muscular-carpenter.jpg
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    May 08, 2012 8:04 AM GMT
    earthsearch said

    We all need a personal trainer that will assist with our daily protein and liquid intake.


    Gotta make sure our potassium levels stay up with a warm salty drink.
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    May 08, 2012 8:10 AM GMT
    Ariodante said
    earthsearch said

    We all need a personal trainer that will assist with our daily protein and liquid intake.


    Gotta make sure our potassium levels stay up with a warm salty drink.


    I hate getting potassium in my eye. It stings!
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    May 10, 2012 5:19 PM GMT
    You could prob find a trainer at 24 Hour fitness to do this LOL. They need that commission icon_razz.gif
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    May 10, 2012 5:21 PM GMT
    Maybe hook up with someone from Planet Fitness ... but don't grunt during the sex part or he'll have to dump you. icon_lol.gif
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    May 11, 2012 12:23 AM GMT
    My trainer is very hot and gay and I'm sure he's had propositions like that before. When I signed up with him I gave me a speech about being 100% professional (no, not That professional, bad boys). So, absolutely nothing sexual ever happened between us, except for tons of innuendos on that topic and hearty laughs.
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    May 11, 2012 12:29 AM GMT
    As a trainer I have to say what an insult. We are professionals who do not mix business with pleasure. It just doesn't work. I appreciate the fantasy but believe me its just a fantasy.
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