Is dating in the South more difficult than other regions?

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    Jun 14, 2012 2:35 PM GMT
    JPtheBITCH said
    What IS it with southerners and sugar? They put it on everyfuckingthing.


    Waaeell, suugar is the food of tha angels darlin. Why you thank they call it "angel food cake"? We be puttin suugar n' cotton in everythang baby. Why, cotton candy was discovered by us Southerners who used to sprinkle suugar on our cotton. CHOMP CHOMP. Soooo goooood! icon_wink.gif
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    Jun 14, 2012 2:38 PM GMT
    MuscleBadger saidI was raised in Savannah, educated in Charleston and now live in NC/SC. I am strangely facinated by this thread that began as "you guys are homophobic, ignorant racists" and evolved into "southerners love sweets and spicy foods" and then became "Calibro and CoachMike get it ONNNNNN"

    Love it!! And to whoever said it... if you cant find loving and decadence in New Orleans, then you must be a loser. It is the funnest, sexiest city in the United States. You get off the plane, start to sweat, get a drink and immediately have sex with the hottest guy you can find (gay or straight).

    They also have the coolest gym I have ever seen. It is the second oldest gym in America and I went and trained with two of their trainers who are both powerlifters... it was like being a rough, hard core powerlifter, but in a loft in Paris!! It was sooooo fucking cool!! And then on the way out, another group of super hot muscle guys had a circle jerk in the locker room and I found out later that about half of them were straight and didn't think anything of it.

    Vegas is for scary, sad straight people..... NOLA is Vegas for fierce people.

    p.s. New Orleans is the only place I ever passed out while standing at a bar. Seriously... my friends have a picture of it. I was standing at the bar and yet was totally unconscious. HAHA



    next time you're here you're going to have to drag my ass out one night. I wanna see if you repeat that feat icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jun 14, 2012 3:24 PM GMT
    raginraider12 said
    I also noticed this isn't just a problem I've encountered. Some of my friends (mostly minorities) can't find dates because they aren't white. I think a lot of southern cities have a lot of problems accepting others and accepting sexuality.


    That's really only going to happen if they're minorities that are exclusively seeking out white men. No matter what part of the country you're in, white men aren't the only option. So if they're having a hard time, then that's their choice.

    I lived in Atlanta for a couple years and have lived in a few different parts of the DMV area and never had a problem getting a date (or getting laid). icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jun 14, 2012 3:54 PM GMT
    Oxford, MS. here and dating is not a problem.

    The only thing I've noted as much different is the lack of population. 48,000+ square miles & under 3m people. Population density less then 63 per square mile. Some places I've been have 1,000s per square mile.
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    Jun 14, 2012 4:04 PM GMT
    great_scott said
    raginraider12 said
    I also noticed this isn't just a problem I've encountered. Some of my friends (mostly minorities) can't find dates because they aren't white. I think a lot of southern cities have a lot of problems accepting others and accepting sexuality.


    That's really only going to happen if they're minorities that are exclusively seeking out white men. No matter what part of the country you're in, white men aren't the only option. So if they're having a hard time, then that's their choice.

    I lived in Atlanta for a couple years and have lived in a few different parts of the DMV area and never had a problem getting a date (or getting laid). icon_biggrin.gif


    You're dead wrong, buddy. You CANNOT compare Atlanta (black gay central!) and the DMV area (again, lots of black gay men there) to, say, a city like Austin, because both areas have black populations that dwarf Austin's. You should know this. ;)

    The problem discussed in this thread also affects racial minorities who date both members of their own race and non-members of their race. This is because such racial minorities may live in cities with a tiny number of men belonging to their racial group.

    That's exactly what happened to me. Austin is predominantly white and Latino. When I moved there, the black population was roughly 7%; this percentage hasn't changed much. As you can imagine, the percentage of available gay black men was even smaller than that. So, unfortunately, my chances of meeting black men to date were virtually nil. I didn't like that at all!

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    Jun 14, 2012 5:05 PM GMT
    I think it depends on what u are looking for in a man. I only like cowboys and country boys. Just like the way they roll. Thus, it is easier to date for me living in the South.
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    Jun 14, 2012 5:10 PM GMT
    Coach_Mike said
    calibro said
    Coach_Mike said
    calibro said
    Coach_Mike saidOh fuck. .


    i invited you to get a pop with me at the new soda shop on main st.... icon_redface.gif


    I'll give you a pop.....


    do i have to call you daddy?


    You don't have to call me daddy but you do have to call my daddy and ask him if you can take me to the soda shop. Bring some of those cakes. He's like me....sugar wins him over every time.


    Now that I know what to do to snag coach_mike my plans are now in action... YUSSSSS!
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    Jun 14, 2012 5:14 PM GMT
    BlkMuscleGent said
    great_scott said
    raginraider12 said
    I also noticed this isn't just a problem I've encountered. Some of my friends (mostly minorities) can't find dates because they aren't white. I think a lot of southern cities have a lot of problems accepting others and accepting sexuality.


    That's really only going to happen if they're minorities that are exclusively seeking out white men. No matter what part of the country you're in, white men aren't the only option. So if they're having a hard time, then that's their choice.

    I lived in Atlanta for a couple years and have lived in a few different parts of the DMV area and never had a problem getting a date (or getting laid). icon_biggrin.gif


    You're dead wrong, buddy. You CANNOT compare Atlanta (black gay central!) and the DMV area (again, lots of black gay men there) to, say, a city like Austin, because both areas have black populations that dwarf Austin's. You should know this. ;)

    The problem discussed in this thread also affects racial minorities who date both members of their own race and non-members of their race. This is because such racial minorities may live in cities with a tiny number of men belonging to their racial group.

    That's exactly what happened to me. Austin is predominantly white and Latino. When I moved there, the black population was roughly 7%; this percentage hasn't changed much. As you can imagine, the percentage of available gay black men was even smaller than that. So, unfortunately, my chances of meeting black men to date were virtually nil. I didn't like that at all!



    The county I live in now is almost 60 percent white, and my dating life is no different than when I lived in ATL. Why? You could send me to Utah, and I'm still going to find what I want to find. Whether the white guys in my area date other races or not makes no difference.

    I wasn't trying to say you should only be dating other black guys. I just said white men aren't the only option unless that's how you want it, and I don't think anyone can reasonably say they were the only choice in any given area, especially not in this country today.
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    Jun 14, 2012 5:53 PM GMT
    calibro saidmen are stupid all over, but hey, penis.
    You need to get laid with me. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jun 14, 2012 7:06 PM GMT
    What is DMV?
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    Jun 14, 2012 7:31 PM GMT
    great_scott said
    BlkMuscleGent said
    great_scott said
    raginraider12 said
    I also noticed this isn't just a problem I've encountered. Some of my friends (mostly minorities) can't find dates because they aren't white. I think a lot of southern cities have a lot of problems accepting others and accepting sexuality.


    That's really only going to happen if they're minorities that are exclusively seeking out white men. No matter what part of the country you're in, white men aren't the only option. So if they're having a hard time, then that's their choice.

    I lived in Atlanta for a couple years and have lived in a few different parts of the DMV area and never had a problem getting a date (or getting laid). icon_biggrin.gif


    You're dead wrong, buddy. You CANNOT compare Atlanta (black gay central!) and the DMV area (again, lots of black gay men there) to, say, a city like Austin, because both areas have black populations that dwarf Austin's. You should know this. ;)

    The problem discussed in this thread also affects racial minorities who date both members of their own race and non-members of their race. This is because such racial minorities may live in cities with a tiny number of men belonging to their racial group.

    That's exactly what happened to me. Austin is predominantly white and Latino. When I moved there, the black population was roughly 7%; this percentage hasn't changed much. As you can imagine, the percentage of available gay black men was even smaller than that. So, unfortunately, my chances of meeting black men to date were virtually nil. I didn't like that at all!



    The county I live in now is almost 60 percent white, and my dating life is no different than when I lived in ATL. Why? You could send me to Utah, and I'm still going to find what I want to find. Whether the white guys in my area date other races or not makes no difference.

    I wasn't trying to say you should only be dating other black guys. I just said white men aren't the only option unless that's how you want it, and I don't think anyone can reasonably say they were the only choice in any given area, especially not in this country today.


    You live in Takoma Park, Maryland. Enough said. ;)
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    Jun 14, 2012 7:45 PM GMT
    MuscleBadger saidWhat is DMV?


    An acronym that the kids are apparently using now for the DC area (District/Maryland/Virginia, get it)? I find it annoying but then I'm old.
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    Jun 14, 2012 7:47 PM GMT
    paulflexes said
    calibro saidmen are stupid all over, but hey, penis.
    You need to get laid with me. icon_biggrin.gif


    icon_twisted.gif
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    Jun 15, 2012 1:41 PM GMT
    BlkMuscleGent said
    great_scott said
    BlkMuscleGent said
    great_scott said
    raginraider12 said
    I also noticed this isn't just a problem I've encountered. Some of my friends (mostly minorities) can't find dates because they aren't white. I think a lot of southern cities have a lot of problems accepting others and accepting sexuality.


    That's really only going to happen if they're minorities that are exclusively seeking out white men. No matter what part of the country you're in, white men aren't the only option. So if they're having a hard time, then that's their choice.

    I lived in Atlanta for a couple years and have lived in a few different parts of the DMV area and never had a problem getting a date (or getting laid). icon_biggrin.gif


    You're dead wrong, buddy. You CANNOT compare Atlanta (black gay central!) and the DMV area (again, lots of black gay men there) to, say, a city like Austin, because both areas have black populations that dwarf Austin's. You should know this. ;)

    The problem discussed in this thread also affects racial minorities who date both members of their own race and non-members of their race. This is because such racial minorities may live in cities with a tiny number of men belonging to their racial group.

    That's exactly what happened to me. Austin is predominantly white and Latino. When I moved there, the black population was roughly 7%; this percentage hasn't changed much. As you can imagine, the percentage of available gay black men was even smaller than that. So, unfortunately, my chances of meeting black men to date were virtually nil. I didn't like that at all!



    The county I live in now is almost 60 percent white, and my dating life is no different than when I lived in ATL. Why? You could send me to Utah, and I'm still going to find what I want to find. Whether the white guys in my area date other races or not makes no difference.

    I wasn't trying to say you should only be dating other black guys. I just said white men aren't the only option unless that's how you want it, and I don't think anyone can reasonably say they were the only choice in any given area, especially not in this country today.


    You live in Takoma Park, Maryland. Enough said. ;)


    I do. Also lived in Rockville and Bristow and nothing but location changed. icon_cool.gif
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    Jun 15, 2012 2:07 PM GMT
    great_scott said

    I do. Also lived in Rockville and Bristow and nothing but location changed. icon_cool.gif


    Good for you. I doubt one could compare the dating pool in Austin to those in Rockville and Bristow. (Have you ever visited or lived in Austin, TX?) Also, your selection criteria might be easy to satisfy.
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    Jun 15, 2012 2:48 PM GMT
    BlkMuscleGent said
    great_scott said

    I do. Also lived in Rockville and Bristow and nothing but location changed. icon_cool.gif


    Good for you. I doubt one could compare the dating pool in Austin to those in Rockville and Bristow. (Have you ever visited or lived in Austin, TX?) Also, your selection criteria might be easy to satisfy.


    BLKMuscleGent,

    I hope this isn't an offensive question, I dont mean it to be. I just dont know the answer so I am going to ask.

    Politically in the South, the black community, which is normally very progressive, is VERY conservative and opposed to the gay community and gay rights. It seems to be a cultural/religious issue (although not being black I cannot speak to the black experience).

    I guess I have two questions:

    1. What do you think is the root of this, considering that if anyone could understand the dangers of legal prejudice it is the AA community who had to struggle for hundreds of years. (I would point out that the only other community that understands legal/institutional bias is the Jewish community and they have embraced LGBT issues)

    2. More personally, as an African American man, has this impacted on your journey or caused you to struggle? Has it made it more difficult? In what way? if you dont want to talk about your personal life, I dont blame you, but we might all benefit from understanding the perspective of a gay black American in the South.

    I know people dont like to talk about racial divides, but in the South they are often real and I find discussing them with kindness and senstivity helps to break down barriers with understanding and knowledge. Please take this in that light.
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    Jun 15, 2012 2:53 PM GMT
    In general i find it hard to find anyone that wants to date in the first place everyone seems to want to play or have threesomes.
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    Jun 15, 2012 2:54 PM GMT
    Try dating in ny. The last 5 out of 5 guys flaked on me and I have yet to get to a third date.
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    Jun 15, 2012 2:55 PM GMT
    At least they say theyd go on a date hahaicon_cool.gif In tampa the question is always lets fuck, or how big are you.
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    Jun 15, 2012 3:08 PM GMT
    RemyNicolei saidAt least they say theyd go on a date hahaicon_cool.gif In tampa the question is always lets fuck, or how big are you.


    I'd rather that since you know what they want and they are being real. Instead I get flakey bullshit
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    Jun 15, 2012 3:09 PM GMT
    It's probably easier to date in the South then in say, Iran or Russia.
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    Jun 15, 2012 3:09 PM GMT
    thats true honesty is always better
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    Jun 15, 2012 3:16 PM GMT
    BlkMuscleGent said
    great_scott said

    I do. Also lived in Rockville and Bristow and nothing but location changed. icon_cool.gif


    Good for you. I doubt one could compare the dating pool in Austin to those in Rockville and Bristow. (Have you ever visited or lived in Austin, TX?) Also, your selection criteria might be easy to satisfy.


    But one absolutely can. The demographics are fairly similar except that both Bristow and Rockville are waaaay more white. Also, Austin is a very big city. That means even a small percentage still equals a lot of people. I don't really have a selection criteria, and maybe that's why I'm more "easy to satisfy", and that's kinda been my whole point.