Meeting online guys who subtract 15 years and add 2 inches.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 8:57 PM GMT
    That's the AOL metric system!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:00 PM GMT
    I've never had good luck in relationships with guys much younger than me, no more than 5 years being about right. But for a trick almost anything legal can do. So I took this prize home from a gay club one night, who said he was 42, when I was 55.

    We had a great time in bed, and I instantly felt myself falling for him, something I'm not prone to do with tricks. I wanted him to stay over and he agreed, thinking as I fell asleep what a great catch he might be, if only he wasn't about a dozen years younger than me.

    Next morning we woke up slowly, I think we had sex again, then napped a little. Still in bed he told me he had a confession to make. My first thought was that he was infected with something, which I've actually heard the morning after a few times before.

    He said he really wasn't 42, but 52. He was so sorry, but in the short time he'd been out in the gay world he learned how important youth is, and he figured he'd do poorly as a 52-year-old. Though he did look younger.

    I put my face in my pillow and started to cry & sob. He got all upset and agitated, continuing to apologize profusely for his lie, trying to console me. I raised my heard and told him they were tears of joy for the miracle. "Miracle?" Yeah, miracle, I told him.

    I fell asleep wishing he was closer to my own age, and during the night the Gay Fairy, or something, had waved a magic wand and I awoke to find my wish granted. It really did seem a miracle to me, like a fairy tale story.

    He was incredulous, couldn't believe I was happy he was older. I tried to explain why, but I don't think he was ever really convinced. But I truly was overjoyed, and we became BFs from that moment, together 2 years, finally parting over his refusal to be monogamous. But they were great years, I don't regret them.

    The moral is you never know what the other guy might want. Maybe your actual age, and not something younger. And he'll almost always want truthfulness, so you're already planting the seeds of your relationship's future destruction when you lie, since most lies get found out eventually, especially something like age. You are building on sand when you are not truthful.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:00 PM GMT
    Montague saidI subtract 20 years, I'm really 43.. I just look good for my age. Must be the family genes... icon_redface.gif



    Black don't crack son
  • Montague

    Posts: 5205

    Jun 21, 2012 9:05 PM GMT
    I know right? Can't go anywhere without being carded, and have all kinds of HS kids hitting on me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:08 PM GMT
    CrankyMcBadass said
    endo saidThat's the AOL metric system!

    I can see your tonsils.


    You really want me to change my profile pic, doncha? icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:09 PM GMT
    Why would you like to know one's penis size, I mean... Is it really that important lol? O_O
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:09 PM GMT
    endo said
    CrankyMcBadass said
    endo saidThat's the AOL metric system!

    I can see your tonsils.


    You really want me to change my profile pic, doncha? icon_smile.gif


    I like it. Looks like you're waiting for something.icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:10 PM GMT
    The topic title pretty much describes 90% of Grindr men.

    How sad.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:12 PM GMT
    Ariodante saidI don't talk to anyone until they've presented notarized medical copies of their Age/Height/Weight and W-2 forms for the past 5 years.
    What, no proof of residency?

    You're a brave man.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:13 PM GMT
    dontknowwhy said
    Montague saidI subtract 20 years, I'm really 43.. I just look good for my age. Must be the family genes... icon_redface.gif



    Black don't crack son


    I'm actually 39,720 years old.

    Pacts with the Prince of Insufficient Lighting and all.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:15 PM GMT
    Alpha, regardless of your age, you are one who definitely doesn't need to add imaginary inches to his profile icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:18 PM GMT
    Bakerboy said
    Ariodante saidI don't talk to anyone until they've presented notarized medical copies of their Age/Height/Weight and W-2 forms for the past 5 years.
    What, no proof of residency?

    You're a brave man.


    I believe in taking chances.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:19 PM GMT
    The Lladrós need another papaíto? icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:22 PM GMT
    pocketnico saidAlpha, regardless of your age, you are one who definitely doesn't need to add imaginary inches to his profile icon_eek.gif


    I have a vague reference to my size in my grindr profile (vague because the nuns who admin the app blush at any direct or overt sexuality).

    Most people think I'm lying.

    Until they see the pics.

    #TotallyTrollingForProfileViews
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:25 PM GMT
    Just_Tim saidI couldn't pull off that kind of con. There's not a lot of interest in 11 year olds...


    You'd be surprised how many pedos are out there (and i'm not referring to farts, pocketnico!)


    I always seem to get the guys that add the inches to their height. I mean, seriously. My height is accurate on any profile. Do you really think that i'm not going to notice that you are not 5'8" when I'm looking down at you?
    It seems to follow this: guys 5'2" and below like to say they are 5'6". Guys 5'3" to 5'6" like to say they are 5'8" or 5'9". Guys 5'7" to 5'8" like to say they're 5'10".
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:26 PM GMT
    AlphaTrigger said
    pocketnico saidAlpha, regardless of your age, you are one who definitely doesn't need to add imaginary inches to his profile icon_eek.gif


    I have a vague reference to my size in my grindr profile (vague because the nuns who admin the app blush at any direct or overt sexuality).

    Most people think I'm lying.

    Until they see the pics.

    #TotallyTrollingForProfileViews


    Isn't it the 8th Wonder of the World?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:29 PM GMT
    ECnAZ said
    Just_Tim saidI couldn't pull off that kind of con. There's not a lot of interest in 11 year olds...


    You'd be surprised how many pedos are out there (and i'm not referring to farts, pocketnico!)


    I probably jinxed myself when I made that comment in another thread. I wouldn't be surprised if the situation flips itself in the near future where I think of "pedophile" instead of "fart" when I read "pedo" in Spanish.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:32 PM GMT
    DAMMIT!! I always get those backwards! Note to self :Must remember to add to penis length & subtract from age.

    Honesty moment...I am only 40 and do not have a 4" penis.
    icon_biggrin.gificon_cool.gificon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:36 PM GMT
    If I followed this rule, I'd be 10 years old and have a 34 inch waist. :/
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:37 PM GMT
    pocketnico saidThe Lladrós need another papaíto? icon_eek.gif


    NEVER.


    ALL MINE.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 21, 2012 9:44 PM GMT
    [quote][cite]S34n05 said[/cite]With how most guys boast you'd think 8 was the average dick size and not under 6 ;P[/quote

    Damn, my discovery is that 8" does seem to be the average size for gay guys.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 22, 2012 1:57 AM GMT
    The only true way to measure your cock is to stick it in another guy's mouth. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jun 22, 2012 1:59 AM GMT
    xrichx saidThe only true way to measure your cock is to stick it in another guy's mouth. icon_lol.gif


    If you really want to ensure that you're accurate, do it hundreds of times so you can take the average.