kencarson saidI've been single for about 6 years now. A lot of my friends seem baffled by this. I always get, "You're so handsome! You must be beating them off with a stick!" Or something to that affect.
Last night I was out to a movie with my friend. We got to talking about relationships and what we're attracted to, and how hard it is to have one. He and I are both pretty good looking and have good bodies, so I brought up the question:
"How many of your friends are good looking and have nice bodies?"
"Quite a few."
"How many of those friends have had or are currently in long term relationships, but aren't serial monogamists?"
I just finished reading The Velvet Rage, and it brought up the trend that gay men who are very focused on their own looks, also tend to require that their partner be as or more good looking as they are. The author goes on to state that many times (not always) men who look for looks as one of the primary requirements for getting into a relationship with someone, often get bored when the "glitter" of the physical dulls and are left with what we all are, an imperfect person.
I took offense to this at first. I mean, I know I have more to offer than just looks. I'm funny, smart, good at my job, etc. But the thing I present to the world the most, is how I look. It's the first thing people see, in person. It's the cute picture I put up of myself on Facebook. It's the majority of what people look at on my dating profile sites.
So, if I'm putting it out there, it stands to reason that that's what people will see in me primarily, and possibly why I get bored of me when they find out my quirks and that I don't look so great first thing in the morning.
I see the trend in most of my good-looking friends too. Either they're clinically single, they hop from boyfriend to boyfriend, or their long term relationship includes some sort of on the side deal (something I'm not necessarily opposed to, but certainly not something I'm seeking out.)
I don't know what the answer is. Do people in long term relationships just settle? Or are they presenting more than just the physical that attracts people who are looking for more than that? Are all good-looking people always just looking for the next best thing? Or have they just gotten used to a pattern of in-and-out relationships that it's hard to break?
As with what litmop said, you are still extremely young! So long as your standards aren't unreasonable, and I'm sure they aren't, you WILL find that special one. There are over 7 billion people in the world; all you need is one. The odds are good. Yes, I'm aware that large number becomes more infinitesemal when you start factoring in gender, age, etc, but I'm just saying, there are a lot of people out there that you haven't met yet. Perhaps it's just not the right time and place!
Also, I would like to point out that attraction is truly in the eye of the beholder. Although there is a general consensus on what beauty may be, attraction is a different story. You can easily find someone beautiful, but not be attracted to them. As such, the common misconception that someone who is gorgeous, like you, "Kencarson", and many people here (of course, in my opinion), will seek only those who are "beautiful" in that same regard (ex. perfect muscle ratio, facial features, teeth etc), is often not the case. You see many couples of which one person is of a more conventional beauty, while the other is not. Although there is that possibility where the better-looking one may have been cheated on a lot and decided to settle with something "safe", or that he is marrying rich, more often than not, it is simply because that partner he is with, is what he finds attractive. We all have an incredibly diverse conception of beauty, and it is fluid, changing from time to time. However, after we get through the initial phases of the relationships, if we find that individual who's inner beauty is what we're looking for, the relationship will continue, through thick and thin.
It is too common to say, "he can do better", when we haven't gotten to know the individuals yet.
Anyway, again, the summary still stands in my own entitled opinion: you are young, you will find someone, your diverse taste (which may or may not present itself in different stages of your life via different experiences) will eventually attract you to an individual who will ultimately become your soul mate.
You are beautiful; we all are, but you are also conventionally beautiful, and you seem sincere.
PS: lastly, people may be threatened by your beauty, and be afraid to approach you. There will, however, be those out there with the confidence to ask you out
Just be patient, be active, and be yourself!