I once accidentally outed a guy. I had switched schools after the friend I confided in outed me. I decided I would never live in the closet again. In changing schools I decided I would not become friends with anyone unless they knew me to be gay and but for one exception I've lived like this ever since. Then I was 20; it was 1977.
I had moved in with an obvious gay guy who had an even more obvious gay lover. Seriously flamboyant. The lover belonged to a frat and I was becoming friendly with one of his frat brothers who was over our place all the time. One day I said how cool I thought it was that he was so accepting of the flaming guy and our conversation continued as normal.
That night I found out what I'd done. "You let the cat out of the bag" was what he told me. He didn't seem mad though. Maybe even relieved though he still had issues to work out. I was kind of shocked because, as I mentioned, I had no idea that everyone in the world didn't know this guy was gay. Turns out he remained accepted by his frat so there wasn't a problem. But I still felt pretty terrible about what I had unknowingly done, particularly since a friend had purposely done the same thing to me.
People talk. Get over it.
But also some people love to live in that closet. And that can be even creepier than people talking.
I had another situation with my roommate then that bothered me even more so. We decided to bring in another roommate and I didn't grasp everything at the time, at how underhanded people could be, but he asked me to not say anything about us being gay, that he wanted to bring in a str8 roommate. I had issues with this but I wasn't strong enough to say fuck that or to just pack up and leave. So I let the situation develop. It was horrible.
We interviewed potential roommates and a really nice guy applied. Plus he was totally hot. I wanted to tell him that we were gay but my roommate insisted that we don't. I stupidly bowed to peer pressure and went back into the closet. He wound up seducing the guy while wrestling one night, which, obviously, outed me as well. I was so pissed off at this guy. I should have been pissed off at myself to allow that to happen. Nothing like that has happened since in my life.
Maybe it is right that people talk. Certainly I should have.