im so confused!

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    Sep 06, 2008 11:22 AM GMT
    hey everyone, im new to this board... and ive been having alot of problems lately.. this is a hard topic for me to deal with so ill keep it simple.
    i discovered recently that i can make myself finish off abit more intensly(while fantasizing) about transsexuals and or basically thinking of my as a female getting penetrated by a man. but i seem to focus on genitals and nothing else. i am not physically attracted to male bodies, penises or transsexuals for that matter. but this has been happening for a while,
    im in my early 20s, dont you think its abit late for this to be happening? like questioning myself? i dont think im gay but these fantasies are freaking me out abit.. do you think that this alone makes me gay or bi??
    like ive allways been in love with women, allways enjoyed sex with women,
    and ive known that from a young age, much the same way alot of you would have discovered your sexual orientation at a young age.. and i am in no way homophobic.. so please dont think im freaking out cos im scared of gay people or anything... but the fact is im kind of upset because it seems to be getting in the way of my life, because i stress out so much about it.. ive honestly spent alot of nights crying that this has happened...
    my psychologist doesnt think im gay and thinks that i am just obsessing, because ive been diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder.
    ive also went to see if i could try to have sex or flirt with a man or transsexual.. didnt work.. i end up just telling them my problems and or talking to them as friends.. i physically cant bring myself to do it
    because it doesnt feel right...
    sorry about the length of my post, but basically thats my problem in a nutshell, can anyone give me some good advice?
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    Sep 06, 2008 4:15 PM GMT
    I don't know much about you, so this is by no means necessarily true, but:

    The act of penetration, and your fantasy of being the "woman" in that act, can be interpreted as a wish to be dominated, and not necessarily by a man. Penetration fantasies are often about power, not sex This is the basis for understanding why rape is not really a sex crime (though it obviously involves sex), it is a crime of forced subjugation and anger. (I'm not saying your fantasies have anything to do with rape.)

    You may be feeling powerless, or you may be feeling a need to have someone else "take charge" of your life, and it may be getting expressed in your unconscious in a sexual way.
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    Sep 06, 2008 4:44 PM GMT
    You'll know when you know,. You might be gay, you might not be, but it's essential that you get in touch with your feelings to know what's going on. Don't stress too much and your question will be answered
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    Sep 06, 2008 5:07 PM GMT
    You're normal and your fantasy is normal....altho your personal scenario is your own.

    Do you know that the number one male fantasy is rape? Doesnt mean the men are gonna go out and rape whomever. ...But in the privacy of a fantasy, we all act out our dirty little sexual scenarios! ...Then we wipe off, pull up our pants and go about being socially acceptable. ... icon_lol.gif

    You're just growing up and becoming an adult. I think you are just freaking cuz you dont know that everybody else does it, too.

    P.S. ... I would fire that psychologist of yours.