Gay love is hard to come by

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 02, 2013 11:32 PM GMT
    @OP
    Any love is hard to come by whether gay/straight/bi etc.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 02, 2013 11:34 PM GMT
    PaulNKS said[...]
    P.S.
    The problem, in my opinion, is that we now have an entire generation (or two) that have no concept of what it is to date, or court another. Today's young people have no idea of how social interaction works, especially in the dating realm.


    You mean like we're using FaceBook and the internet incorrectly (like, you know, on-line dating)?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 02, 2013 11:39 PM GMT
    You're preaching to the choir, honey.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 02, 2013 11:40 PM GMT
    great pun
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 02, 2013 11:41 PM GMT
    AMoonHawk saidJust wait until you are my age ... you may as well hang a sign around your neck
    "Property Condemned"


    I hear ya. Go into any big city with older-crowd bar, tons of sexy muscled SINGLE guys with great personalities, jobs, etc etc. They----we----are jaded and for good reason.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 02, 2013 11:49 PM GMT
    JamieJfromtheA said
    PaulNKS saidI don't believe there is such a thing as "gay" love or "straight" love. When you are in love with a partner, it is the same type love, no matter the sexes.

    With that said, the OP is once again being defeatest or homophobic. It is no harder to find love as a gay man than it is as a straight man.

    Some people just like to whine and blame their insecurities and failures on anything or anyone other than themselves.

    P.S.
    The problem, in my opinion, is that we now have an entire generation (or two) that have no concept of what it is to date, or court another. Today's young people have no idea of how social interaction works, especially in the dating realm.



    No offense but you sound bitter..

    It always kills me how the "young generation" don't have this and that...but while you are saying that, where are the older generation...aka the parents.

    Looks like someone dropped the ball

    If you older ones did your job then maybe the young ones would not be the way they are. Last time I checked children didnt raise themselves...or maybe they did, hence the issues these days.

    Morals and Ethics, and other good behavior and qualities are learned not ingrained, and if us youngins don't know about it, it's cause you guys didnt teach it.

    as for everything else said..i think it is harder. Gay people are a minority, so as such you would have a harder time finiding the "one" it's math really...

    you have to find other gay people, where they go, and what they do etc etc etc..as a guy from Alabama....it's hard just finding other gay people who arent even in the closet.

    Now the thing about love being equal...Agreed.


    You're right. Children don't raise themselves. Still, they have brains, logic, and the ability to reason. The real problem is that personal responsibility is non-existent. Just as the previous and current generations are at fault for not properly parenting their children, said children are just as at fault for not questioning these tactics and taking responsibility for their own actions.

    People like you use these boards to write whiny, self-absorbed posts about how shitty your lives are. What you fail to recognize is that you control your own destiny. You don't *have* to live in Alabama. You *choose* to live there, which is your right. I'm sure you have your reasons. Still, don't complain about your lot in life if you're having trouble finding love in an area full of closeted gays. Sometimes, you have step outside of your own comfort zone to find true happiness. You can either do that, or you can choose to be a victim. I hope you choose the latter, but I fear your defeatist attitude will cause you to choose the latter.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 03, 2013 3:29 AM GMT
    Yaorem saidcuz 30 below are hookersicon_cry.gif


    generalizations is it not? icon_wink.gif

    just like the title of this thread
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 03, 2013 3:58 AM GMT
    redsoxfan791 said
    JamieJfromtheA said
    PaulNKS saidI don't believe there is such a thing as "gay" love or "straight" love. When you are in love with a partner, it is the same type love, no matter the sexes.

    With that said, the OP is once again being defeatest or homophobic. It is no harder to find love as a gay man than it is as a straight man.

    Some people just like to whine and blame their insecurities and failures on anything or anyone other than themselves.

    P.S.
    The problem, in my opinion, is that we now have an entire generation (or two) that have no concept of what it is to date, or court another. Today's young people have no idea of how social interaction works, especially in the dating realm.



    No offense but you sound bitter..

    It always kills me how the "young generation" don't have this and that...but while you are saying that, where are the older generation...aka the parents.

    Looks like someone dropped the ball

    If you older ones did your job then maybe the young ones would not be the way they are. Last time I checked children didnt raise themselves...or maybe they did, hence the issues these days.

    Morals and Ethics, and other good behavior and qualities are learned not ingrained, and if us youngins don't know about it, it's cause you guys didnt teach it.

    as for everything else said..i think it is harder. Gay people are a minority, so as such you would have a harder time finiding the "one" it's math really...

    you have to find other gay people, where they go, and what they do etc etc etc..as a guy from Alabama....it's hard just finding other gay people who arent even in the closet.

    Now the thing about love being equal...Agreed.


    You're right. Children don't raise themselves. Still, they have brains, logic, and the ability to reason. The real problem is that personal responsibility is non-existent. Just as the previous and current generations are at fault for not properly parenting their children, said children are just as at fault for not questioning these tactics and taking responsibility for their own actions.

    People like you use these boards to write whiny, self-absorbed posts about how shitty your lives are. What you fail to recognize is that you control your own destiny. You don't *have* to live in Alabama. You *choose* to live there, which is your right. I'm sure you have your reasons. Still, don't complain about your lot in life if you're having trouble finding love in an area full of closeted gays. Sometimes, you have step outside of your own comfort zone to find true happiness. You can either do that, or you can choose to be a victim. I hope you choose the latter, but I fear your defeatist attitude will cause you to choose the latter.


    I chose to live in Alabama huh, I guess I chose to be gay, and black. I chose a sick father, and dead mother, wow...I guess I made some horrible choices before I was born...

    Life isnt always about choices. SOmetimes you don't have a choice..if you are in control of every thing you do then more power to you. I live in Alabama because I was born here, maybe now I do choose to stay here but it is because of a sick father who needs me...who got his foot and part of his led cut off last week..i guess I chose that as well.I guess I chose to have Sickle cell anemic...I made some horrid choices then.

    Life kicks people's ass dude, it always has and it always will, there is nothing wrong about expressing how you were hurt by it, and yes I have been depressed, because My ass has been kicked by life and alot of stuff I couldnt control.

    To me there is no such thing as being in control of your destiny because
    1. You have to know what it is to control it
    2. You have to know how to get it
    3. There is no guarantee that you will.

    Just because you want something doesnt mean it is meant for you, and that it will work out for you. Even if I was to leave Alabama that doesnt mean I would find a guy and get married, it doesnt mean this that and the other.

    Nothing is guranteed nor owed to me or anyone else.
    Also I have deicded to stop being so sad a while back and to think positive on my own accord, but expressing my hurt doesnt make me whiny...to be 23 years old I have been through alot, more than the average person at my age, and I have the right to be upset.

    If I want to complain then fine, If i want to be angry then fine, I have the right to be.

    That's what sucks the most, people go through hell and then others give them grief for being sad about it or expressing it. No one is in 100 percent control of their life.. no one.

    I always find it interesting how people have these simple statements and try to apply them to peoples life. If it was that simple it would be done, but like you mentioned, I have my reasons..

    you seem logical, so ask yourself this, if being happy was so simple for everyone wouldnt they take the steps to do it. Things arent as simple on in real life as it is on paper.

    I never considered myself whiny, I had issues that I never talked about...ever, so I did here. But you judge as if you know anything about me. If I were truly a defeatist I would have given up a long time ago. Again you judge as if you know.

    However, I don't let life make me bitter and such, I use my experiences to be kind and reach out to others, and most things I ask are for clarity and to understand more about myself and get opinions from those who have been through similar experiences.


    I guess i would be better posting topics about who I would like to wake up in bed next to, or if I would date or pass someone because those are so important ...icon_rolleyes.gif

    P.S.
    People are products of their enviornment, whether in the household or community. Thinking, logic, reasoning etc are skewed depending on how you were raised and who you are around.

    If a child never had parents..and no one to tell him what not to do, then its his fault when he makes a mistake? To him it may not have been a mistake.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 03, 2013 7:20 AM GMT
    WickedRyan saidAs some one who found true love late in life 39 let me give a suggestion.I am far from an expert.Get out a pad and write down a list of non negotiables that will apply to men you might date.I don't mean stupid things like must be over 8 inches.For example...I lucked out in that I have an incredibly sexy talented man.My mother married a nasty idiot who although book smart he could not screw in a lightbulb.I am not too handy myself.So I like a man who can do things.If my fiancée drank a lot that would have been a no go from day one. So lets say you are 28 and financially independent,You might be willing to accept someone who is poorer than you but has other qualities you love.Setting some absolutes before you go out searching is a good first step.icon_smile.gif Nothing wrong with being choosy but gay men need to be a little more realistic .Ryan


    THIS. One must be open to people's differences, though those differences should not be harmful to you or others. Well - those are two big factors for me at least. I have a list, but it's not so specific that I miss a great opportunity with someone because they're not what I was expecting. I believe that THAT'S a common mistake.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 03, 2013 3:57 PM GMT
    JamieJfromtheA said
    PaulNKS saidI don't believe there is such a thing as "gay" love or "straight" love. When you are in love with a partner, it is the same type love, no matter the sexes.

    With that said, the OP is once again being defeatest or homophobic. It is no harder to find love as a gay man than it is as a straight man.

    Some people just like to whine and blame their insecurities and failures on anything or anyone other than themselves.

    P.S.
    The problem, in my opinion, is that we now have an entire generation (or two) that have no concept of what it is to date, or court another. Today's young people have no idea of how social interaction works, especially in the dating realm.



    No offense but you sound bitter..

    It always kills me how the "young generation" don't have this and that...but while you are saying that, where are the older generation...aka the parents.

    Looks like someone dropped the ball

    If you older ones did your job then maybe the young ones would not be the way they are. Last time I checked children didnt raise themselves...or maybe they did, hence the issues these days.

    Morals and Ethics, and other good behavior and qualities are learned not ingrained, and if us youngins don't know about it, it's cause you guys didnt teach it.

    as for everything else said..i think it is harder. Gay people are a minority, so as such you would have a harder time finiding the "one" it's math really...

    you have to find other gay people, where they go, and what they do etc etc etc..as a guy from Alabama....it's hard just finding other gay people who arent even in the closet.

    Now the thing about love being equal...Agreed.


    Absolutely not. Anyone that knows me, knows that I'm an easy going guy and all around happy. I made of my life what I wanted... well, with my partner.

    You're right to a point about parent. I see parents letting their children sit in front of a computer or on a video game most of the time, instead of spending time, creatively, with others their own age. Because of this they never learn how to interract in society and then do nothing but whine and complain because they either can't or won't meet someone and fall in love yesterday.

    I don't care what a person's life is. I don't care if someone thinks life kicked their ass. A person with responsibility will pick himself up, kick it back, and take what he wants, or always go through life happiness than he deserves.

    The OP is complaining about a problem without knowing that it's up to him to find love. It's up to him to plan his own life instead of sitting and hoping life lands in his lap.

    It's time young people stand up and take responsibility for their future.

    I know one young man on here that everyone is familiar with. I admire him. For a young man, his age, he has overcome obstacles and still laughs. He is putting himself through school when most people would give up. Life kicked his ass and fucked him without a kiss. He is pulling himself back up because he knows that only he can do it. This is the type of young man that will have a happy, enriched, love filled life... not the whiners like the OP.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 03, 2013 4:46 PM GMT
    PaulNKS said
    JamieJfromtheA said
    PaulNKS saidI don't believe there is such a thing as "gay" love or "straight" love. When you are in love with a partner, it is the same type love, no matter the sexes.

    With that said, the OP is once again being defeatest or homophobic. It is no harder to find love as a gay man than it is as a straight man.

    Some people just like to whine and blame their insecurities and failures on anything or anyone other than themselves.

    P.S.
    The problem, in my opinion, is that we now have an entire generation (or two) that have no concept of what it is to date, or court another. Today's young people have no idea of how social interaction works, especially in the dating realm.



    No offense but you sound bitter..

    It always kills me how the "young generation" don't have this and that...but while you are saying that, where are the older generation...aka the parents.

    Looks like someone dropped the ball

    If you older ones did your job then maybe the young ones would not be the way they are. Last time I checked children didnt raise themselves...or maybe they did, hence the issues these days.

    Morals and Ethics, and other good behavior and qualities are learned not ingrained, and if us youngins don't know about it, it's cause you guys didnt teach it.

    as for everything else said..i think it is harder. Gay people are a minority, so as such you would have a harder time finiding the "one" it's math really...

    you have to find other gay people, where they go, and what they do etc etc etc..as a guy from Alabama....it's hard just finding other gay people who arent even in the closet.

    Now the thing about love being equal...Agreed.


    Absolutely not. Anyone that knows me, knows that I'm an easy going guy and all around happy. I made of my life what I wanted... well, with my partner.

    You're right to a point about parent. I see parents letting their children sit in front of a computer or on a video game most of the time, instead of spending time, creatively, with others their own age. Because of this they never learn how to interract in society and then do nothing but whine and complain because they either can't or won't meet someone and fall in love yesterday.

    I don't care what a person's life is. I don't care if someone thinks life kicked their ass. A person with responsibility will pick himself up, kick it back, and take what he wants, or always go through life happiness than he deserves.

    The OP is complaining about a problem without knowing that it's up to him to find love. It's up to him to plan his own life instead of sitting and hoping life lands in his lap.

    It's time young people stand up and take responsibility for their future.

    I know one young man on here that everyone is familiar with. I admire him. For a young man, his age, he has overcome obstacles and still laughs. He is putting himself through school when most people would give up. Life kicked his ass and fucked him without a kiss. He is pulling himself back up because he knows that only he can do it. This is the type of young man that will have a happy, enriched, love filled life... not the whiners like the OP.



    this +100000
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Jan 07, 2013 3:27 AM GMT
    i believe u bro..ive never been in a relationship and well i still have my V card...... most guys just want sex,a one night stand and thats it.i want more,i wana get to know a guy first before i have sex.....to b specific,i want love icon_smile.gif