Some people on this forum need to own their shit

  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 3:34 AM GMT
    LEANDRO_NJ saidI understood the OP's frustration even if he generalized and broke his own rules!!

    no. "some" is not a generalization.
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1344

    Jan 03, 2013 3:39 AM GMT
    MikeW said
    LEANDRO_NJ saidI understood the OP's frustration even if he generalized and broke his own rules!!

    no. "some" is not a generalization.


    O.K! although I always thought that "some" implies more then one person!? isn't that a generalization of sorts? pardon me if I am wrong, but English is not my first language!
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 3:50 AM GMT
    LEANDRO_NJ saidO.K! although I always thought that "some" implies more then one person!? isn't that a generalization of sorts? pardon me if I am wrong, but English is not my first language!

    "some" could imply more than one person, yes. but "some" is not "all". moreover, i clarify *precisely* who i am speaking of in the OP itself "anyone who starts a thread about how all gay guys...." etc. this happens on this forum a lot. read yourname2000's post, above. he totally gets it.

    i'm not talking about everyone who posts in this forum because not everyone makes such blanket statements about people they identify as "other" than themselves.
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1344

    Jan 03, 2013 3:57 AM GMT
    MikeW said
    LEANDRO_NJ saidO.K! although I always thought that "some" implies more then one person!? isn't that a generalization of sorts? pardon me if I am wrong, but English is not my first language!

    "some" could imply more than one person, yes. but "some" is not "all". moreover, i clarify *precisely* who i am speaking of in the OP itself "anyone who starts a thread about how all gay guys...." etc. this happens on this forum a lot. read yourname2000's post, above. he totally gets it.

    i'm not talking about everyone who posts in this forum because not everyone makes such blanket statements about people they identify as "other" than themselves.


    Mike just let them be! you have no idea how helpful it is for someone to express how they are feeling at that precise moment when they post something on the forums! your topic does have a point, but your concerns is no different from those who also have shared their own personal frustrations! you are not wrong but neither is everyone else!!
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 4:01 AM GMT
    Trollileo saidI think my shit owns me, though.

    i understand it can feel that way sometimes, trollileo, but its not so.

    we all have our bullshit. we all have our baggage. we all have something to learn. OWNING it means coming out of denial and accepting responsibility for it rather than projecting it outward onto someone else.

    i don't think you have that problem. if anything, quite the contrary.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 4:07 AM GMT
    LEANDRO_NJ saidMike just let them be! you have no idea how helpful it is for someone to express how they are feeling at that precise moment when they post something on the forums! your topic does have a point, but your concerns is no different from those who also have shared their own personal frustrations! you are not wrong but neither is everyone else!!

    who said anything about "everyone"?

    so, according to you, it os OK for someone to say all black women are crack whores? all gay men are child molesters? all asians have tiny dicks? all young people are irresponsible? all old men are pervs... etc., etc., etc.

    note what i said... people who say such things NEED TO OWN IT. need to own that their opinion is just that, their opinion, and is not a truth based in objective fact. what they are saying says more about THEM than whom ever they are slamming.

    why is that concept so difficult to grasp?
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1344

    Jan 03, 2013 4:30 AM GMT
    MikeW said
    LEANDRO_NJ saidMike just let them be! you have no idea how helpful it is for someone to express how they are feeling at that precise moment when they post something on the forums! your topic does have a point, but your concerns is no different from those who also have shared their own personal frustrations! you are not wrong but neither is everyone else!!

    who said anything about "everyone"?

    so, according to you, it os OK for someone to say all black women are crack whores? all gay men are child molesters? all asians have tiny dicks? all young people are irresponsible? all old men are pervs... etc., etc., etc.

    note what i said... people who say such things NEED TO OWN IT. need to own that their opinion is just that, their opinion, and is not a truth based in objective fact. what they are saying says more about THEM than whom ever they are slamming.

    why is that concept so difficult to grasp?


    NEED TO OWN IT?? it seems to me that you are the one who is obsessed to own everyone else's shit!? live and let live that is my motto!

    A wise man once said to me "If what is being said is not about you personally. say nothing! I could rebuttal your argumentive approach, but I know better! anything you say about me or even your intent to put words in my mouth of things I did not say is your call to pick up an argument of I said you said! but if you still insist on being right, and if it makes you feel better because this is your topic, then go ahead and inflate your ego if that is what makes you feel better!?


  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 4:40 AM GMT
    LEANDRO_NJ saidNEED TO OWN IT?? it seems to me that you are the one who is obsessed to own everyone else's shit!? live and let live that is my motto!

    "own it" means take responsibility for it.
    so it really is ok with you if someone else says you and people like you (people from your country, your religion, your race, your sexual preference, what ever) are fuckwads?
    A wise man once said to me "If what is being said is not about you personally. say nothing!

    but when someone asks, "why are all gay men __________" fill in the blank, that IS personal because i am apart of that demographic.
    I could rebuttal your argumentive approach, but I know better! anything you say about me or even your intent to put words in my mouth of things I did not say is your call to pick up an argument of I said you said! but if you still insist on being right, and if it makes you feel better because this is your topic, then go ahead and inflate your ego if that is what makes you feel better!?

    so.... i'm wrong and you're right, but that's not about your ego?

    icon_rolleyes.gif
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1344

    Jan 03, 2013 4:52 AM GMT
    MikeW said
    LEANDRO_NJ saidNEED TO OWN IT?? it seems to me that you are the one who is obsessed to own everyone else's shit!? live and let live that is my motto!

    "own it" means take responsibility for it.
    so it really is ok with you if someone else says you and people like you (people from your country, your religion, your race, your sexual preference, what ever) are fuckwads?
    A wise man once said to me "If what is being said is not about you personally. say nothing!

    but when someone asks, "why are all gay men __________" fill in the blank, that IS personal because i am apart of that demographic.
    I could rebuttal your argumentive approach, but I know better! anything you say about me or even your intent to put words in my mouth of things I did not say is your call to pick up an argument of I said you said! but if you still insist on being right, and if it makes you feel better because this is your topic, then go ahead and inflate your ego if that is what makes you feel better!?

    so.... i'm wrong and you're right, but that's not about your ego?

    icon_rolleyes.gif


    Whatever Mike! I have being on this forum on and off, and everyone who knows me or have read my posts can tell you that "being right" has never being my intentions; what matters to me the most is what makes you feel better. But if me being right and you being wrong makes you feel better, then lets just leave it at that, ok buddy!?
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    Jan 03, 2013 4:59 AM GMT
    Old people diva fight!!!!
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 5:00 AM GMT
    yourname2000 said@Mike: "Even if you win an argument with an idiot, all you "win" is an argument with an idiot." icon_wink.gif

    yep. sum get it, sum don't.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 5:02 AM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidOld people diva fight!!!!

    lol. hella scary, right? icon_twisted.gif
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    Jan 03, 2013 5:05 AM GMT
    MikeW said
    LEANDRO_NJ saidO.K! although I always thought that "some" implies more then one person!? isn't that a generalization of sorts? pardon me if I am wrong, but English is not my first language!

    "some" could imply more than one person, yes. but "some" is not "all". moreover, i clarify *precisely* who i am speaking of in the OP itself "anyone who starts a thread about how all gay guys...." etc. this happens on this forum a lot. read yourname2000's post, above. he totally gets it.

    i'm not talking about everyone who posts in this forum because not everyone makes such blanket statements about people they identify as "other" than themselves.

    It's true that "some" is not equivalent to "all" and you may have clarified who you are targeting in your first post. But what I get from this thread is that anything you feel you may need to state publicly should be prefixed with "I think", "I believe", "I feel". If all you are looking for is people to take responsibility for what they post so that there is no misrepresentation of who is doing the accusing, than surely we should all follow this rule.

    But I think a more succinct argument would be for those who accuse others using blanket statements about race, body size, etc to realize the gravity of their statements before opting to make it public. In other words, think before you post, and realize what you say reflects more about yourself as an individual than you may have wanted.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 5:10 AM GMT
    TheBizMan saidBut I think a more succinct argument would be for those who accuse others using blanket statements about race, body size, etc to realize the gravity of their statements before opting to make it public. In other words, think before you post, and realize what you say reflects more about yourself as an individual than you may have wanted.

    ^^^ this.

    to be clear, i know damn well fools who post blanket statements implying their superiority over others of whatever demographic ARE NOT EVER going to own their shit. (take responsibility for their prejudice.) but if i can awaken a few READERS on this forum, this thread will have served its purpose.
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    Jan 03, 2013 5:25 AM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidOld people diva fight!!!!

    Old school diva fight, kiddo:



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 03, 2013 5:27 AM GMT
    All old people are so crabby...

    * runs out the door *
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    Jan 03, 2013 5:36 AM GMT
    I have a superior taste in aesthetics and anybody who has ever disagreed with me is always wearing boring, ugly, conservative shit in their profile pics. Just saying.
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    Jan 03, 2013 5:38 AM GMT
    yourname2000 said@Mike: "Even if you win an argument with an idiot, all you "win" is an argument with an idiot." icon_wink.gif
    You can never win an argument against an idiot because stupid people are immune to logic.
  • LEANDRO_NJ

    Posts: 1344

    Jan 03, 2013 6:06 AM GMT
    TheBizMan said
    MikeW said
    LEANDRO_NJ saidO.K! although I always thought that "some" implies more then one person!? isn't that a generalization of sorts? pardon me if I am wrong, but English is not my first language!

    "some" could imply more than one person, yes. but "some" is not "all". moreover, i clarify *precisely* who i am speaking of in the OP itself "anyone who starts a thread about how all gay guys...." etc. this happens on this forum a lot. read yourname2000's post, above. he totally gets it.

    i'm not talking about everyone who posts in this forum because not everyone makes such blanket statements about people they identify as "other" than themselves.

    It's true that "some" is not equivalent to "all" and you may have clarified who you are targeting in your first post. But what I get from this thread is that anything you feel you may need to state publicly should be prefixed with "I think", "I believe", "I feel". If all you are looking for is people to take responsibility for what they post so that there is no representation of who is doing the accusing, than surely we should all follow this rule.

    But I think a more succinct argument would be for those who accuse others using blanket statements about race, body size, etc to realize the gravity of their statements before opting to make it public. In other words, think before you post, and realize what you say reflects more about yourself as an individual than you may have wanted.


    I have learned that it is a lot more effective getting past the adjectives, insults, and whatever prefix used, and just concentrate on the core message or feeling being expressed.

    How many times we have said in a moment of anger, frustrations, confusion, and pain things we later regret simply because we could not find the right words to express how we really felt at a particular emotional stressful moment? look me straight in the eye and tell me if during such state of mind, you really have the time to think what is the right of wrong thing to say? people need to concentrate on learning to feel more and not pay so much attention on how things are being said. I deal with people's problems all day long in my line of work, and rather then jumping in and telling them they are wrong, or judging the face value of their every spoken word, I find it is a lot more effective to let them speak their heart out first, even if they used improper language; people have no idea the power and effectiveness of being a good listener, and that is sad!! It is extremely important to extract the very core of what is being said by putting yourself in the person's shoes, then judging their feelings by the face value of the language used to express how they really feel.

    I don't think the OP is wrong in saying that topics with a layer of racism, sexism, prejudice, or hate is in essence "ONE'S OWN SHIT" but why bother if it is not his!? while it is true that what you say is a reflection of you, this can also be true about the critic/observer who complains about every one else's reflection!! in nature every plant drives on different kind of lighting, some need full sun, others need full shade, while others in between; but at the end they all do well and survive. Human nature is no different!
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 7:45 AM GMT
    jmusmc85 saidAll old people are so crabby...

    * runs out the door *

    no need to pussy out or NEthing. ur 2 cute 2 insult.
  • MikeW

    Posts: 6083

    Jan 03, 2013 7:47 AM GMT
    McQueen saidI have a superior taste in aesthetics and anybody who has ever disagreed with me is always wearing boring, ugly, conservative shit in their profile pics. Just saying.

    truth.

    boring, lackluster, nondescript, forgettable: that's my style.
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    Jan 03, 2013 9:52 AM GMT
    Taking a stand on SOME huh? Seems kind of like backpeddling to me.

    By saying "some people on this site" instead of "I think some people on this site", you are insisting that your opinion is fact. It doesn't matter if you say "some", "5%", "80%" or "100%". You are making a claim that a number of people are what you say, and by your rules of needing to always say "I think" first, you are presenting your topic as the word of God.

    What if other users think that no people on this site need to own their shit?

    This whole thread and the intention behind it isn't very cohesive. "Own their shit" sounds cool, but a more descriptive word choice would have conveyed the specific point you were trying to make.
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    Jan 03, 2013 1:40 PM GMT
    yourname2000 said
    MikeW said
    yourname2000 said100% agree: these topics are borne of anecdotal observation and not a scientific survey. But invariably the OP ends up positioning some monstrous slur as a global aeon of TRUTH that he just discovered with only 3-5 recent examples.

    Ermagawd: the last 5 black guys I saw were on a basketball court...
    ...ALL BLACK MEN PLAY BASKETBALL.

    Ermagawd: the last 5 gay guys I saw were at the bar last night....
    ....ALL GAY MEN WERE AT THE BAR LAST NIGHT.

    Morons. And the fact that they usually are using this new found "truth" to wallow in some bullshit misery they've invented for themselves proves that, too.

    tumblr_lkcybuJMxq1qazj2jo1_500.jpg


    yep. you get it FOR THE WIN.

    I'm thinking some people are choosing not to get it just to be disagreeable. icon_lol.gif


    Or because it's fun to fight with a seriously earnest and torqued up OP. But you wouldn't know anything about that, would you? icon_razz.gif

    More seriously, though, I agree with the premise but think it's a lost cause here. Logic is often in short supply. In my experience and opinion. icon_wink.gif
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    Jan 03, 2013 1:41 PM GMT
    MikeW said
    Trollileo saidI think my shit owns me, though.

    i understand it can feel that way sometimes, trollileo, but its not so.

    we all have our bullshit. we all have our baggage. we all have something to learn. OWNING it means coming out of denial and accepting responsibility for it rather than projecting it outward onto someone else.

    i don't think you have that problem. if anything, quite the contrary.


    Given how our friend Trolli was feeling last night, I think he was talking about actual shit. Hope he feels better today
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    Jan 03, 2013 3:48 PM GMT
    It takes more than a jock to stand and own his shit for all to see.