What's your coming out story? :D

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 06, 2013 2:26 PM GMT
    Hi guys, how did you come out to your parents? icon_biggrin.gifDD i need advices. : )
  • Arab_in_NL

    Posts: 100

    Jan 06, 2013 8:06 PM GMT
    I'm not out yet, and don't think I'll come out anytime soon.
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    Jan 06, 2013 8:41 PM GMT
    It was a very slow process; I'm not even out to my dad. I think it's important for you to not feel obligated to come out. I never understood some of my high school peers who had to announce their sexual orientation, only to be made fun of for it and act extremely bitter toward others. It's your own life and you don't need a megaphone to tell everyone which way you swing. You might feel it's necessary to tell your parents now, but I'd wait if they are your source income and overall support. I waited until I left for college...and since I got a full-ride, my parents don't pay for a dime of school and therefore cannot hold anything against me!

    Just wait until people approach you. If they ask, "Are you gay?" Just be honest. I know this sounds insanely cheesy, but be yourself. It really comes in handy in this situation. Good Luck!!!
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    Jan 06, 2013 9:14 PM GMT
    I don't care what my parents think, and I should not have to "come out". Being gay (or bisexual in my case) is normal, and I don't want to make a fanfare out of something that shouldn't need it.

    If anyone wants to know my orientation, they can just ask, or maybe get a clue when they see me with someone.
  • Jubadiju

    Posts: 221

    Apr 08, 2013 11:54 AM GMT
    My parents found me out as a teenager, sneaking around meeting guys. Pretty terrible way to happen, but they were surprisingly good about it. They really tried to understand, but I still don't think they do. Hope it works out for you. Be patient with them icon_smile.gif

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    Apr 08, 2013 6:11 PM GMT
    To me it was kind of sudden.

    It was the beginning of 2013, a young local politician came out of the closet, and it was discussed in a TV show.

    My mum and I were watching it, and all of a sudden I felt the urge to come out, so I just went causally and told my mum "You know what, I'm just like this guy as well".

    Luckily she's pretty supportive to me, even though she did agree that it was really an awkward way to come out. icon_lol.gif
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    Apr 08, 2013 6:26 PM GMT
    told them individually. told my mom on my birthday during the nighttime. told my father in the wee hours of the morning when i was experiencing a panic attack while i was in bed about a week after i told my mom. my heart just started to race, started to lose touch with reality and then i ran to my parents bedroom where my father was asleep. i woke him up and then told him that i was gay. he thought that i was crazy but i was dead serious. later on that day, i asked him if i really told him that i was gay earlier and he said yes. he took it better than my mother did. my mom wasn't upset like angry or crying but she was disappointed. none of them suspected that i was gay. icon_surprised.gif

    either way, they didn't kick me out the house and i thought they would have disowned me. i came out to my immediate family. now it's my friends and extended family that i have to worry about. icon_cry.gif i have anxiety issues so it's not going to be easy. it took me about a year to come out to my parents but that was after i got help and sought out counseling to help me with coming out and self acceptance. it took time and i had to build myself up to that point where i was like "it's now or never". just prepare yourself to come out BUT you can never prepare for the reactions. expect the best and expect the worst.
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    Apr 08, 2013 6:52 PM GMT
    first off, you;re really hot!
    now that i have got that out of my system heres my story:
    i told my mum over the phone i gathered enough courage to say i need to tell you something, mum im gay, im a gay man. she said what? and then i repeated it, she said are you sure? i said yes, please love me, as i love you. she said of course i will always love you no matter what, even if you were a serial killer and murdered half the city i would still love you [very dramatic, indeed! thats latino mums for you] she then said she already knew, there was something not quite right and she never wanted to accept it. obviously she needed time to process this new reality and time to 'mourn' the loss of the plans she had for me. she has come around significantly ad is very very supportive. obviously parents need time, my therapist said that it's important to give them their space. bear in mind, you are not asking for permission, you are communicating a reality to them, kinda giving them a newsflash.

    everyone is diferent and your parents will process things at different speeds. so dont expect them to throw you a party but they will eventually become supportive of your lifestyle, in my case, since i live in a different country anyway she hasnt told my grandparents (who are in their 90's) there;s no need for you to share your news with the world, it's not like you're living in the closet at all, but you dont (at least i dont) let sexuality define me, nor do i parade it down the streets.