Piers40 saidHow did you guys end up with a fuck buddy?
I always worry that when I'm initiating contact, it will be interpreted as me wanting a relationship and either scare them away or make them fall in love.
How do you get to the point without being intense/full on where you can arrange hook ups?
Consider that question but without the sexual component. How do you end up with an acquaintance, versus a friend, or a close friend, or your best friend?
Don't those things sorta happen on their own, not deliberately planned?
I've had fuck buddies because we tricked and liked the sex, but weren't into dating each other. Or the other guy didn't want to date anyone, just have sex with me and others.
And how did we get to trick? Lots of ways. A simple bar cruise, where we left together for the purpose. Or a guy I hung with because he was the club DJ and I like music, and sometimes the winter weather would turn bad and he'd say don't drive in it, just stay here tonight, so I would and we'd fuck.
In the 1960s & 70s the term was casual sex, and that's what a fuck buddy is. As soon as you start planning and overanalyzing it you're no longer having casual sex.
Have the (safe) sex first, and then decide if you're connecting on any other levels. If you're not, then have the sex again anyway, and now you've got yourself a fuck buddy.