What have you learned from past relationships?

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    Feb 12, 2013 3:16 AM GMT
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon said
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon saidall you guys have such negative views on relationshipicon_confused.gif

    Don't get me started.


    idk everyone is just like love is is pain, never fall for someone, it so sadicon_cry.gif

    Yeah, I know. Only difference is that I'm always walking into the fire. They break up with me. I'm never good enough. Like a fuckin idiot, I try and again.


    thats cause, you don't believe in yourself, and you attract yourself to losers, if you believe that you a are going to find someone awesome that will love you, then you will, its all about changing the subconsciousness, cause thinking like that will only lead to failure, but think and know that you will find someone good and watch whats happens, but you got to start loving yourself first, and every flaw that someone might not like, you love iticon_surprised.gif
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:29 AM GMT
    The inability of one party to communicate properly can lead to MAJOR complications when things get rough. They cover things up and deceive so they don't have to face the music. Some surprises are fucking nasty!

    Have the courage establish financial boundaries. You may love the person, but know when to say MY money is MY money.
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:32 AM GMT
    archon said
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon said
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon saidall you guys have such negative views on relationshipicon_confused.gif

    Don't get me started.


    idk everyone is just like love is is pain, never fall for someone, it so sadicon_cry.gif

    Yeah, I know. Only difference is that I'm always walking into the fire. They break up with me. I'm never good enough. Like a fuckin idiot, I try and again.


    thats cause, you don't believe in yourself, and you attract yourself to losers, if you believe that you a are going to find someone awesome that will love you, then you will, its all about changing the subconsciousness, cause thinking like that will only lead to failure, but think and know that you will find someone good and watch whats happens, but you got to start loving yourself first, and every flaw that someone might not like, you love iticon_surprised.gif

    I'll just have to wait and see what crosses my path next time. This is game changing you're talking about. Can't go solely by your advice alone, but I'll tell you now, it's not the first I've heard this here a few times since the last relationship.
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:36 AM GMT
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon said
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon said
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon saidall you guys have such negative views on relationshipicon_confused.gif

    Don't get me started.


    idk everyone is just like love is is pain, never fall for someone, it so sadicon_cry.gif

    Yeah, I know. Only difference is that I'm always walking into the fire. They break up with me. I'm never good enough. Like a fuckin idiot, I try and again.


    thats cause, you don't believe in yourself, and you attract yourself to losers, if you believe that you a are going to find someone awesome that will love you, then you will, its all about changing the subconsciousness, cause thinking like that will only lead to failure, but think and know that you will find someone good and watch whats happens, but you got to start loving yourself first, and every flaw that someone might not like, you love iticon_surprised.gif

    I'll just have to wait and see what crosses my path next time. This is game changing you're talking about. Can't go solely by your advice alone, but I'll tell you now, it's not the first I've heard this here a few times since the last relationship.


    just listen to your intuition, and you can never do wrong, if you want a new relationship why you got to wait, don't let the world create for you, you create for it, go out tomorrow wit the intention and you will find it.
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:37 AM GMT
    Make the best of a good thing while you have it because you never know when your paths will divide.

  • Feb 12, 2013 3:45 AM GMT
    Honest is the best policy.

    Say your piece but don't belabor the point.

    Give him a chance to respond.
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:47 AM GMT
    archon said
    just listen to your intuition, and you can never do wrong, if you want a new relationship why you got to wait, don't let the world create for you, you create for it, go out tomorrow wit the intention and you will find it.

    I'm not ready for stepping out anytime soon, but when I'm good I'll be ready. Have to start in areas more relevant first.
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:52 AM GMT
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon said
    just listen to your intuition, and you can never do wrong, if you want a new relationship why you got to wait, don't let the world create for you, you create for it, go out tomorrow wit the intention and you will find it.

    I'm not ready for stepping out anytime soon, but when I'm good I'll be ready. Have to start in areas more relevant first.


    whenever you feel like you are readyicon_smile.gif but it only takes a second to fix something(^_^)
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:58 AM GMT
    I'll break it up into the biggest things I learned from each previous relationship.

    First, 3 years long:
    Sex! Sex is an absolute must, this relationship went three years with no sex at all and occasionally me getting a BJ, but wasn't allowed to reciprocate...Fuck that, sex is awesome! icon_twisted.gif

    Second, 6 months:
    Don't get treated like shit, was right after my weight loss and I had terrible self-esteem still. Was incredibly emotionally abusive, told me once during sex that I should watch him and another guy go at it so "I could learn what to do", and constantly talked about other guys etc; took me a while to come to my senses.

    Third, 1 year:
    I need someone with ambition and goals, was 12 years my senior, no job, no goals, no plans, and was a pot head. Was a great guy overall, but the relationship became sort of stagnant.

    Last one wasn't necessarily a boyfriend, dated for a few months:
    If a guy ends things over an email, with multiple chances to tell you in person...he probably wont make a good friend.
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    Feb 12, 2013 3:59 AM GMT
    Never open a joined bank account even after 3 yrs into the relationship
    tumblr_m90o49h5O51qmdr2bo1_250.gif
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:07 AM GMT
    1. Can't date someone while you are in the closet. Relationships have enough drama as is.
    2. Understand yourself and your needs before trying to understand someone else.
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:22 AM GMT
    dont ever think they would never cheat on you...and if u go through theyre phone be prepared for the worse and realize what u are looking for so dont be surprised
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:23 AM GMT
    TRUST.

    If I take one thing with me, this is it. TRUST them. Not everyone is out to make your life living hell... and sometimes I need to remind myself of this in a relationship.
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:26 AM GMT
    My first 10-year guy was a few years older than me. My second 10-year guy was nearly 10 years older than me. I buried both.

    I learned to go after someone younger than me. I'm told they'll last longer.
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:40 AM GMT
    "Rich" ain't it all it's cracked up to be.

    When it's over it's over. But it never ends.

    Fear is always worse than reality.

    Sitting at Someone's funeral is horrible. An urn with His ashes in the trunk of the Cadillac will stop Your heart.

    Love is endless.

    Men are amazing.





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    Feb 12, 2013 4:40 AM GMT
    I have full-on determination to date someone who is 180 degrees to the type of guys I've dated before.

    It was a big wake up call for me to see how I kept attracting the same type.




    archon said

    just listen to your intuition, and you can never do wrong, if you want a new relationship why you got to wait, don't let the world create for you, you create for it, go out tomorrow wit the intention and you will find it.



    @Archon - Marry me! You are wise beyond your young years.

    Intuition will guide us. However be mindful of our focus and the energy we send out as we will attract the same to us (e.g., if you think guys will always cheat even though you don't want them to, guess what you're going to get?)

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    Feb 12, 2013 4:41 AM GMT
    Cash said

    When it's over it's over. But it never ends.







    ugh. cry
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:43 AM GMT
    I've learned that the things that were wrong with them were reflections of the things that were wrong with me. Our insecurities, our failings, our inner turmoils, our vices: they matched each other in a complimentary way. The things I disliked in my exes are things I allowed because of flaws in myself.

    If you date someone who is deeply flawed, take a look in the mirror and ask yourself why those flaws "fit" you.
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:43 AM GMT
    Sometimes letting go is the hardest thing you can do but is the most important thing you can do for yourself.

    You need to make sure you take care of yourself on top of your partner.

    Some Relationships are only meant to be temporary, and get you ready for when you commit to someone permanently.

    You will always love a person who you give your heart to...but it is a different type of love
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:47 AM GMT
    Larkin saidI've learned that the things that were wrong with them were reflections of the things that were wrong with me. Our insecurities, our failings, our inner turmoils, our vices: they matched each other in a complimentary way. The things I disliked in my exes are things I allowed because of flaws in myself.

    If you date someone who is deeply flawed, take a look in the mirror and ask yourself why those flaws "fit" you.


    PREEEEACH!

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    GIFSoup
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    Feb 12, 2013 4:57 AM GMT
    pr0cess saidNever open a joined bank account even after 3 yrs into the relationship
    tumblr_m90o49h5O51qmdr2bo1_250.gif


    That's something I don't plan on doing. Not an issue if both partners make similar amount. I don't think you really need to have join bank accounts until kids start getting involved (which they rarely do in our type of relationships).
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    Feb 12, 2013 5:11 AM GMT
    archon said
    JRaRJ_2694 said
    archon said
    just listen to your intuition, and you can never do wrong, if you want a new relationship why you got to wait, don't let the world create for you, you create for it, go out tomorrow wit the intention and you will find it.

    I'm not ready for stepping out anytime soon, but when I'm good I'll be ready. Have to start in areas more relevant first.


    whenever you feel like you are readyicon_smile.gif but it only takes a second to fix something(^_^)

    I'll remember that. Think I'll take a page from the heartbreak and go with some who is going where I'm going, not a champion of the kinds of places I've been.
  • ignaceqbc

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    Feb 12, 2013 5:16 AM GMT
    S34n05 saidQuestion at hand - What have you learned from your past relationships that influenced you to act differently in your recent ones?


    i learn how to share my life, and i learn how to love somebody, how to sacrifice my life, my soul for my next boy friend.
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    Feb 12, 2013 5:18 AM GMT
    Larkin saidI've learned that the things that were wrong with them were reflections of the things that were wrong with me. Our insecurities, our failings, our inner turmoils, our vices: they matched each other in a complimentary way. The things I disliked in my exes are things I allowed because of flaws in myself.

    If you date someone who is deeply flawed, take a look in the mirror and ask yourself why those flaws "fit" you.


    True. I guess I trust too easily. Blind spots.
  • ignaceqbc

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    Feb 12, 2013 5:23 AM GMT
    fotoben saidSomeone who is open, honest, and vocal about what they want and need to be happy is absolutely invaluable.


    [b]not 100% agree...some one who is open, and honest..thats good,,a man should be honest and open, but being too vocal...that is irritated [/b]