Inability to Top?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 12, 2013 8:38 PM GMT
    Hey fellas! I have a dilemma and would appreciate any feedback. I'll try to keep it brief.

    Basically, I can't for the life of me successfully top another guy. It's something that I really want to do, but every time I try I can't stay hard enough. It's frustrating because ever since I was a kid and started masturbating, most of my sexual fantasies have involved me playing a dominant, traditionally "top" role. I love bottoming and would even consider myself a power bottom, but I still get really turned on by the thought of topping another guy. I rarely masturbate with any anal stimulation; I just imagine myself fucking the shit out of someone.

    I've tried to top three times. Each time it's just been a one time hookup, and I go into it not really expecting to try to top but at least open to the possibility. The guy says he wants me to fuck him, and I get really hard, but once the condom goes on and my dick is knockin' at the door, I go soft. And a couple more hand jerks won't get me hard again. It takes a little bit to get my engine revved up again.

    In none of these instances was I drunk or high, and I don't take any prescription drugs. The last time I tried, I psyched myself up for it, told myself to "fake it til I make it," and it still didn't work. It has to be something psychological.

    I recently met a guy who is also inexperienced with topping, and we've talked about practicing on each other. I think that will help, but any tips or advice from y'all would be very welcome!

    Good luck out there and stay safe, fellas.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 12, 2013 8:47 PM GMT
    Since you're Versatile, find another guy who is also.

    Start off bottoming for him first, hopefully by that point you'll be really turned on then you can top him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 12, 2013 11:20 PM GMT
    Don't jack off for a day or two before. That should help as well.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13999

    Feb 12, 2013 11:39 PM GMT
    Maybe you'd be more comfortable with someone you know better.

    You could also get a Fleshjack and try using that with a condom.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 12, 2013 11:53 PM GMT
    It's performance anxiety. You're trying too hard. Relax. When putting on the condom, don't focus on the act of unwrapping the condom and putting it on your cock; rather, focus on how much fun you're going to have with the bottom when that condom is on and you're ready to fuck. Try eating his ass or kissing him while putting on the condom. Or, you could ask him to suck your nips (if your nips are wired to your cock) while putting on the condom. Have fun and don't sweat this stuff.
  • Suetonius

    Posts: 2568

    Feb 13, 2013 8:07 AM GMT
    If you were a man, I would advise taking Viagra/cialis/levitra/generic ED drug. But I have no idea if these human drugs work for trolls.