Profile Texts, who does read them and are they important?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 4:35 PM GMT
    Hello guys,

    I was curios how many of you guys really take the time to read the Profile through before mailing or answering somebody. And how much can it affect your decision on mailing somebody?

    I for my part try to read the profiles first, except when the Text is really long, then I just overfly it. Its a good guide for me to find out what he is intrested in and if we could understand us.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 5:16 PM GMT
    I always read it, except for if it's really long in which case I read the first paragraph to get the gist.

    Although not having one doesn't mean I won't contact someone (I mean, c'mon!), I do think it's really important, and here's what I look for:

    1. When it says in BIG LETTERS THINGS THAT HE HATES and LOTS OF RULES FOR CONTACTING ME then I don't bother

    2. Inversely, a light hearted profile is a bonus point. I'm easy going, right!

    3. "Straight-acting" and "curious" are automatic disqualifiers (I'm sorry, but I'm no counsellor and I've done my dash with self-loathers)

    4. Interesting and creative profiles are a turn over as intelligent and unique guys turn me on

    5. Activities/interests that we might have in common

    6. If it's really long, and especially if it's a life story/confession, then I normally don't bother either as it suggests the kid has a lot of baggage...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 5:23 PM GMT
    I do read them...that's the only reason I choose this site vs other sites.

    I think people here seems to be a little bit more than "let's hook up" (which is fine with me as well) but I like to see what other people are interested in more than anything else....I have sex at home already so it is not my main motivator.

    I joined last night but have been visiting the site for a few weeks, I find it very refreshing.

    and I angree 100% with everything 4outof6 said...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 5:34 PM GMT
    a picture might grab my attention, but it's the text that keeps it.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 5:35 PM GMT
    I disagree on your last point 4outof6. A Story/Confession can tell a lot about a persons Personality. I also have one of these in my profile and I don't see it as baggage. Its more an heads up for those who had the same experience.
  • cacti

    Posts: 273

    Aug 31, 2007 5:35 PM GMT
    Well it depends on my mood, I suppose. Obviously the first thing that gets my attention is the photo, since that is the first thing you see.

    If the photos are super revealing and overtly sexual, I tend not to read too much.

    The times I end up reading further down is when the photo(s) reveal some personality.

    I will admit that if they're scorching on a certain level... I will desperately scroll down regardless to see how far away they live. :P
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 6:43 PM GMT
    Length doesn't bother me, unless it's a long string of quotes from semi-famous people (write your own profile, please) or a glob of undivided text (few/no periods or paragraphs, especially with random CAPITALIZATION).

    The more personally revealing they are, the better--unless they are hateful/unfriendly in some way. I tend to have a longer attention span than most, though... so I know I'm in the minority there.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 6:46 PM GMT
    I virtually always read a profile. We're in a medium where we communicate almost entirely by text--the pictures are nice, don't get me wrong, but they're not really communication--so I figure it's worth checking out what someone has to say about himself.
  • gymingit

    Posts: 156

    Aug 31, 2007 6:47 PM GMT
    Now that Realjock has switched to BETA, we can add a lot more information. I update my profile by dating what's been going on with my progress. Some guys have asked me to do so and talk about how I've managed my weightloss over the last year.

    But your question.... I always find some endearing quality from hot, sexy, cute and the like... adding most everyone I see to my hotlist until it freaks out on and I do send messages based on looks quite a bit, but I also like reading profiles in order to get to know someone other than just telling them they're hot. Some profiles... like the longer ones.. are actually quite interesting.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 7:06 PM GMT
    I always read the text, and it DOES sometimes determine whether or not I message an individual back. Length isn't generally an issue because I find many of the profiles interesting to read.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 8:13 PM GMT
    I'm not here to date or hook up, but I read lots of the profiles of guys I see on the forums. Profiles can give me a better sense of who the guy is.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 31, 2007 8:52 PM GMT
    I always read them too. I think it's a good indication of what they're like because it's premeditated. Mine is vague and all over the place because I threw it down in haste, but one day I shall find time an rewrite is as a sestina
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 4:59 AM GMT
    hmm. this is like the age old question about how long of a penis is a good penis. long enough, but not too long. a bit thicker but not too thick, there, that's about right.

    i've read profiles that were a torrent of words relating nothing. i've read profiles so short they leave you gasping for breath and filled with amazement.

    a good profile is like a good penis. it fills you with pleasure and new experiences, and it isn't meant to rip you assunder. spelling pun intended.

    i do like reading profiles of people. while i am reminded of the stereotype regarding brawn and brain and never the twain shall meet -- sometimes i am pleasantly shocked to see a really handsome fellow comes with a neatly packaged medulla oblongata superior. aka 'le brain.

    it's sure nice to enjoy the eye candy but as has been said, this caught my attention but the conversation kept it.

    yes i read profiles and yes it makes a difference in if and how i respond. :)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 5:25 AM GMT
    Well, as some of you have seen, my profile has evolved as I have gone through changes in my life. I WAS idmalestudent, timid, afraid, full of self-hate... until I became sundown55 and came out. You would be amazed to see how much I have changed, and how my life has changed. My profile reflects that. Keep watching.

    Anyway, I LOVE to read people's profiles. There is such a diversity to humanity, and I appreciate the joys, struggles, blessings and curses that people go through. As I've said before, for me, it's the whole package.

    Speaking of which, I had my first date, last night, with a guy. 50 years old (I'm 52), cute as a button, and so upbeat and positive and interesting. I had such a good time, and my first gay kiss came from him. WOW. Being gay is INCREDIBLE & WONDERFUL! I wouldn't have it any other way.

    I love your profiles, guys, they have really helped me to identify with you better, and have helped me in so many ways. Keep it up, and let your profiles evolve. I go back and read, and re-read.

    Love you guys,
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 5:48 AM GMT
    how is it they say? "you go girl!" hmm, nahh - not me. i think i'll just sit here and be cute and emphatically say congratulations! :)

    life only gets much more fresh once you've stepped out of the musty closet.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 6:35 AM GMT
    Oh, good for you Sundown! That's totally cute, and it made me smile for you.

    As for the topic, text is king. Anytime I get a random IM or email from someone I immediately check their profile and read what they have to say. If they don't say anything, then I usually don't respond. If they at least say a little about themselves, and aren't offensive I'll usually respond.

    A profile absolutely has to have text. A picture is great and all, but it doesn't tell me enough about a person. Take some time; write a little bit.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 11:19 AM GMT
    I read profiles, and if I get a chuckle or find their profile interests me I will email the guy. I just find that some guys on here will not even reply to messages. Just don't understand that. Especially if I compliment them, a simple thanks would be nice.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 12:23 PM GMT
    I read them (if there's something there to read. I will like imaxim and firefighterblue3 said, skip over them if they're just a lot of quotes or a political manifesto. If there's nothing there to read, I'm unlikely to respond to it. I great set of pictures isn't enough.

    Great pics are eye candy and to that metaphor, lacking 'intellectual-cultural-social' nutrition. The profile is indicative of whether thats there. But also in that context it's still just an intro. I couldn't describe myself fully in 5 minutes of talking much less 500 words. I can however give an overview.

    How's this?
    I like woodworking, reading orchestral scores, raising orchids, working out, playing the harp, painting, creating digital art, learning math, cooking (French style). (I could go on.)

    Though all of that is true, it can come off as anything from 'all over the place' to self centered to elitist, etc.

    I'll read and if I'm intrigued, I'll ask for more info.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Sep 01, 2007 12:23 PM GMT
    Like the Gay Japanese Bloggers have already said
    ... a picture is worth a thousand words

    But the text or the absence of will either verify what I already assumed or make me go..WTF?!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 1:11 PM GMT
    Damn. Now I have to rewrite mine... It's so much easier when you think they're being ignored. ;)

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 2:25 PM GMT
    Eye candy is nice, but if I really want to see what someone is about I will read their profile. Then contact them if they are local and see if they want to hang out (and no... not the euphemism for sex). lol

    I wish more would read mind though. I hate it when guys try to IM me when there hasn't been any earlier contact via mail, and they have no pictures/profile. I'm only gonna chat up someone who I know something about, like I state in my profile. And it seems a little presumptuous and disrespectful when they disregard that and message me anyway.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 3:01 PM GMT
    As others have said, a picture will grab my attention (and other parts of my body), but a profile with something to say will keep my interest.

    The only thing I will add is that a VERIFIED profile always gets my attention over one that is not. Anyone can post a pic of a porn star, a guy in a magazine, or some hot thang they saw on the beach.

    Fantasy is great, but real life is even better. I'd love to be 6' 220 pounds, fabulously wealthy, devastatingly handsome and mind-boggingly well-endowed. Well, I'm already one of those five things.

    It takes a Real Jock to post accurate pictures of themselves -- and be proud of those pictures.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 4:05 PM GMT
    I read the profiles. In fact, I will only answer mail calls from people who have fully written profiles. Sure, it's impossible to encapsulate one's self in a few words. But you can give people a flavor of what interests you, your angle on fitness, and why you are on RJ.

    That's one thing that is so great about this site. Many sites have pictures of hunky guys...but connect up an intellect, a range of interests, with hunkiness...and you have the reason that peterstrong put on his profile that he'd like to be able to date all of us RJ Buddies.

  • liftordie

    Posts: 823

    Sep 01, 2007 5:08 PM GMT
    i always read the profiles, and i am kind of disappointed if that section is left blank. a handsome face will always get my attention but what someone has to say will usually keep it!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 01, 2007 5:29 PM GMT
    I just got done revamping my own profile since I decided to make this site one of my favorites. Since this site is devoted to fitness I just included my fitness info, assuming that was all anyone wanted. But in the past couple of weeks I've found this to be a great online community, especially here in the forum.

    So far I haven't come across a "red flag" profile at this site. Everyone here is an athlete and is used to mixing with others at the gym, playing on teams and knowing how to be "in the moment" with other people. That's what has gotten me to like it here so much.

    There's plenty of psychobabble I could throw at the subject, but we all know a lot (not all) of gay men who aren't athletic or play on teams who don't hone their social skills all that well. How often have we been on dates with guys who were ready to be married that night because someone was giving him his first bit of attention? Like all of us at some stage, these people just need to grow some more, have some more experiences.

    At other sites I can spot these guys in their texts. They give too much away and are too specific about what they're looking for. When I see a profile go beyond three paragraphs I tune out...and I am a writer! LOL!

    A friend of mine sent me his possible text for a profile at a dating site. It was really long, didn't tell anything about what he did or where he lived or things he liked. It focused on how he wanted to be satiated emotionally and sexually, using phrases like "I want a guy who will kiss me in the morning even though I have bad breath! I want a guy who will be by my side if I am sick!"

    I told him that we are ALL looking for these things and that all of this writing told me that he would be clingy and needy in relationship. Maybe he wouldn't be, but most people weren't going to give him a chance to find out. He wanted passion and he wanted it NOW!!!! Who wants to walk into that situation?

    So, after being ironically longwinded, I'd say that texts can give away more than a person thinks. As far as profiles go, less can be more, I've always found.