Hugging straight males

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    Nov 20, 2008 5:24 PM GMT
    I am not the hugging type. I was shocked at Thanksgiving when my brother gave me a hug. First time in ? years. So unless they initiate it I don't hug straight guys. Gay guys yes if I feel they don't mind it.
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:27 PM GMT
    I only hug straight guys I don't know, and only if I think they have a boner.








    (j/k of course)
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:35 PM GMT
    I think this is the single gayest thread I've yet seen on here.
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:38 PM GMT
    judoguy said
    MuscleGrappler saidGuys who train in grappling sports hug a lot. Among very close friends, some even kiss on the cheeks. Since we participate in a sport with close physical contact everyone is comfortable about it.


    agree, except for the kiss on the cheeks icon_surprised.gif haven't seen that yet in judo


    It's not uncommon among Brazilians. In the last UFC, Damian Maia, a BJJ expert, beat his American opponent Nate Quarry. After the fight, Damian went to kiss Nate as a show of respect. I guess the American was caught off guard because he didn't turn his head and got a kiss right on the lips ! icon_biggrin.gif


    smoochlf4.gif
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:45 PM GMT
    I'm not real huggy but among athletes slap-ass, pat-pat, and huggy poo are pretty common. Shit. They're hot guys.

    Towel snapping is the weirdest behavior in the locker room. So, well..."gay"

    I've heard so many stories about those frat circle jerks.

    Male bonding, it's a strange thing.

    What's funny is how trendy some of these folks are (gays in particular). One guy cuts a shirt one way, and the next week they're all doing. Same with the stupid low shorts, or low rider pants. It's just real funny to watch.

    So many are followers, and incapable of independent thought.

    Anyway....yep...lots of huggy-poo, pat-pat,and slap-ass seems to be in athletes.

    I think the hugging is more common in the younger crowd (my young friends do it to me all the time) than in the older crowd. I think that probably the older crowd has a different set of sensibilities. Mostly, the change has been positive,in my view.

    Of course, nothing is more funny than a guy who's a "jock" who opens his mouth and a purse falls out. Eww. Ick.
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:49 PM GMT
    Family members mostly, not, with maybe the exception of my brothers at family/holiday gatherings - oh the agony but that's another thread. Most of the rest of the men in the family are from the old school "men don't hug each other they might think we're gay" mentality. Aside from that our family has never been all that close, family gatherings are more like an awkward dinner with people you really don't know, but pretend to in order to satisfy their egoic needs for belonging somewhere. But anyway I digress.

    Friends are quite another story, I have several friends who have been very close friends for a number of years and it's not unusual at all for us to hug. There's is a lot to be said for a hug with our full presence, that kind of hug that is given with the present awareness that our very close friend is here in our arms. It may sound a bit unusual but there are even occasional random small group hugs with three or four of us. I guess I just have a very loving group of friends. But I probably would not be so likely to do the same in a public setting, there a simple nod or handshake suffices completely.
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:53 PM GMT
    hugs, pats, last time I got a kiss which I sure as hell wasn't expecting, whatever the other person is with comfortable with and how well you know each other.. Hugs are very common after a long time no see. I do not think there is a rulebook what is okay or not in general, since it depends on the friendship you developed.

    The athlete thing mentioned, I think I will never get over the visuals you get when someone scores a soccer goal and the whole team joins in for something ..very very weird.
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    Nov 20, 2008 5:59 PM GMT
    flex89 saidI think this is the single gayest thread I've yet seen on here.


    I'm channeling Nelson Muntz from the Simpsons..."Haaahaaa."icon_twisted.gif
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    Nov 20, 2008 6:41 PM GMT
    All the time... I'm a huge hugger. I also am known to kiss them on the cheek
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    Nov 20, 2008 8:06 PM GMT
    Hugs and kisses all around, there my mates, I love'em, gotta let'em know.

    hehe its funny initiating a straight into hugging, always so cute and caught off guard and eventually tehre the ones doing it!
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    Nov 20, 2008 8:39 PM GMT
    With gay friends all the time! My straight friends I hug as well and then throw in a little kiss on the cheek just to see their reaction icon_eek.gif... LOL... PRICELESS! icon_lol.gif

    **Please note, do not attempt on straights you don't know**
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    Nov 20, 2008 10:58 PM GMT
    Devilboy77 said**Please note, do not attempt on straights you don't know**


    na sweet stix, there the fun ones!
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    Nov 20, 2008 11:29 PM GMT
    Oh I'll hug them... I'll even pat them on the back while I hug hem. Its the most action I can get around this town icon_lol.gif
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    Nov 20, 2008 11:32 PM GMT
    Here in Britain, hugging is SEVERELY frowned upon. Not considered as the strong British Bulldog, whose upper lip is so stiff, one can bend a iron bar over it!
    My normal approach to other guys is always with a handshake until I have got to know the person better. Then if I sense that things look hopeful, I ask whether I can hug him. Nine out of ten the response is positive because, I think, he appreciates my respect for his personal space.
    Just twice in my life, on both occasions when I was in my twenties, I approached a guy and tried unasked to hug him. What he did was to fold his arms across his chest, then with elbow leverage, forced us apart. This was quite hurtful and humiliating, even when there was no one else present. From these experiences, I've cottoned on to what Britishness is all about, and I'm very cautious about hugging acquaintances ever since.
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    Nov 20, 2008 11:35 PM GMT
    MuscleGrappler said
    judoguy said
    MuscleGrappler saidGuys who train in grappling sports hug a lot. Among very close friends, some even kiss on the cheeks. Since we participate in a sport with close physical contact everyone is comfortable about it.


    agree, except for the kiss on the cheeks icon_surprised.gif haven't seen that yet in judo


    It's not uncommon among Brazilians. In the last UFC, Damian Maia, a BJJ expert, beat his American opponent Nate Quarry. After the fight, Damian went to kiss Nate as a show of respect. I guess the American was caught off guard because he didn't turn his head and got a kiss right on the lips ! icon_biggrin.gif


    smoochlf4.gif


    Damnit, why must the clip be so short!
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    Nov 20, 2008 11:41 PM GMT
    Sure -- old friends who are straight always hug me... hugged an old pal the other night -- a former NHL player in fact!
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    Nov 21, 2008 12:00 AM GMT
    Here's the full monty:

    http://blog.ronin5.com/ufc-91-video-damian-maia-vs-nate-quarry-video-clip/

    You have to watch the silliness until the whole video loads and then you can skip to the end.

    Enjoy.

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    Nov 21, 2008 12:02 AM GMT
    Oh, I got wrapped up in the search and forgot to respond to the thread subject.

    I don't hug straight men except my Dad.
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    Nov 21, 2008 12:06 AM GMT
    I'm a hugger. My best friend (straight) will always hug me, even if we've seen each other just yesterday.

    And I agree that younger people are more into hugging. My nephew's best friend (who I'm close to also) once pushed my hand away when I extended it to shake his hand and said, "friends don't get handshakes", then gave me a big hug.

    It's funny how straight guys put up the macho bullshit, but once they start hugging, they see it doesn't make them any less of a man and it lets your friends know you really care about them.
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    Nov 21, 2008 12:14 AM GMT
    Yeah, if they're very close to me, I don't think about it. If I don't know them very well, I will only hug if they initiate it. I've even got a couple of hugs from some straight male co-workers after I returned after taking a year off. I was really surprised and appreciative considering both are somewhat disapproving of homosexuality and were probably even a little homophobic years ago when we first met.
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    Nov 21, 2008 12:30 AM GMT
    I don't hug co-workers or classmates, but close friends, family (except the homophobic older brother) i def hug on a fairly regular basis... my little brother is probably more into hugging than me even... and he tends to rub my head a lot... lol. But in high school, all my guy friends hugged...
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    Nov 21, 2008 4:09 AM GMT
    I kiss my two best friends - both straight - on the cheek and hug them hello and good bye. I've known these guys FOREVER -- a couple of their kids are my godchildren.

    Seemed perfectly natural to me. I never gave it a second thought until my partner/husband/whatever found it odd when he first met them.

    We're also really big on the drunk "I love you, man"!
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    Nov 21, 2008 4:18 AM GMT
    VinBaltimore saidWe're also really big on the drunk "I love you, man"!


    Oh gawd my mates do the same, over and over again and usually every time, they get closer and closer until there sitting on my lap and they think its the funniest thing ever..

    they do it drunk, I do it sober, its even more funny for me then icon_biggrin.gif
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    Nov 21, 2008 4:22 AM GMT
    all the time... there usually is some sort of handshake involved as well during the hug, but nonetheless its a hug.
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    Nov 21, 2008 4:31 AM GMT
    lilTanker said
    VinBaltimore saidWe're also really big on the drunk "I love you, man"!


    Oh gawd my mates do the same, over and over again and usually every time, they get closer and closer until there sitting on my lap and they think its the funniest thing ever..

    they do it drunk, I do it sober, its even more funny for me then icon_biggrin.gif


    Sounds like I need to buy you a beer sometime.