CRUISING IN THE LOCKER ROOM

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 25, 2008 11:02 PM GMT
    It seems to me that what those who are in the "it just harmless fun" camp are missing the consideration angle. We all were taught as kids, at least I was, that there's a time and place for everything and to be considerate of others.

    The gym is not the place to be engaging in sexual activity simply because there are those of us who are at the gym to work out and would prefer not to run into someone else (whether gay or straight, young or old, hot or not) engaging in sexual activity. It's just a matter of being considerate and thinking of others. In other words, get a room people. We have bathhouses, one hour motels, and homes for the purpose of hooking up.

    Also, sure its flattering to be noticed by someone. We all like attention, but there is a line where stalking or staring becomes rude and make the other guy feel uncomfortable, which is a feeling no one like to feel. Hot dudes have feelings too!
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    Dec 26, 2008 12:01 AM GMT
    I've been cruised a few times, and i find myself blushing and embarrassed by it. usually i just smile and turn away, be polite and without saying anything, my body language will let them know, 'hey, not interested.'

    BUT, LA Fitness, huh? hmm....guess it depends on whose checking you out of course.
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    Dec 26, 2008 12:57 AM GMT
    Sparkycat saidI've never understood the appeal of having sex in a public toilet. It's just too gross. Guys who do it must have self-esteem issues.





    I agree that self-esteem issues are probably involved, but most of us have self-esteem issues that manifest themselves in one way or another. I've never understood the appeal of it, but I'm sure there are things I do that cause others to think, "What does he find appealing about that? He must have self-esteem issues." (And I definitely do.)

    Hoodiestud saidI went into the steamroom once, and i was just chillen. And this guy started talking to me to the side. He was pretty good-looking, but i mided my own business. He was in all his clothes and just chillen...we talked about silly things, lots of small talk. When out of nowhere, he asks how i can possibly be in just a towel, cuz if he was, he would get hard. I was a little taken aback by this statement, but i just told him, "the heat in here doesn't really get me all excited" haha

    He said, "yeah, it is a little hott in here isn't it? Aww...what the hell" He then took off his pants and underwear and the next thing ya know hes sporting a huge boner and says "Geez, see I knew it...."

    And i couldnt help but peak over, but i told him, "Dont worry about it, im sure it happens to alot of guys" not even believing my own words! hahaha

    but then he said, "geez it is really hard" and he started stroking it just a bit asking me, "wanna touch??"

    I looked at him, and despite it being a very nice penis, I said "No thank you" and walked out....lol

    My heart was beating so hard i thought i was gonna die! lol....

    Can anyone beat that story??


    Can anyone beat that story? Interesting word choice. icon_wink.gif
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    Dec 26, 2008 2:55 AM GMT

    I live in redneck country Georgia, and go to LAF. And yes, even HERE the lockerroom cruising is out of control.

    There's nothing that pisses me off more than a guy ogling me in the lockerroom, lately I've even started to change into my swimwear in the bathroom stalls to avoid the leering old men who stare.

    On the workout floor I have my ipod blaring and a pissed off face to deter anyone from hitting on me. It's not too much to ask to leave the cruising to Barnes and Nobles, where it belongs.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13999

    Dec 26, 2008 3:22 AM GMT
    Hoodiestud saidI went into the steamroom once, and i was just chillen. And this guy started talking to me to the side. He was pretty good-looking, but i mided my own business. He was in all his clothes and just chillen...we talked about silly things, lots of small talk. When out of nowhere, he asks how i can possibly be in just a towel, cuz if he was, he would get hard. I was a little taken aback by this statement, but i just told him, "the heat in here doesn't really get me all excited" haha

    He said, "yeah, it is a little hott in here isn't it? Aww...what the hell" He then took off his pants and underwear and the next thing ya know hes sporting a huge boner and says "Geez, see I knew it...."

    And i couldnt help but peak over, but i told him, "Dont worry about it, im sure it happens to alot of guys" not even believing my own words! hahaha

    but then he said, "geez it is really hard" and he started stroking it just a bit asking me, "wanna touch??"

    I looked at him, and despite it being a very nice penis, I said "No thank you" and walked out....lol

    My heart was beating so hard i thought i was gonna die! lol....

    Can anyone beat that story??


    I would have asked him if that act normally works for him.
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    Dec 26, 2008 4:43 AM GMT
    Try the Boston Sports Club (any of the locations) it's crazy scary and sooo obvious. I am surprised some of them don't pass out from heat stroke (no pun intended)icon_biggrin.gif
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    Dec 26, 2008 4:49 AM GMT
    Koaa2 saidIn a perfect, non religious world, my perfect gym would be a place that one could work out in, ... and get off in whatever way one would want to, with whoever they would want to.


    Such facilities already exist. They're called the Club Baths. People go to them because they want and expect sexual advances.

    Not so at a regular gym. People go there to work out and perhaps to socialize. If they wanted something more, they'd go someplace else where they expected (or hoped) sexual advances would be made. It's not a question of morality, but of respecting the reasonable expectations of gym members.
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    Dec 26, 2008 5:19 AM GMT
    I go to a privately owned gym with 2 locations here in PA. I've personally not experienced a great deal of cruising in the locker rooms. There are the occasional glances, but in my opinion they're totally permissible.

    Generally guys that pass me quick glances are around my age so it really doesn't bother me. Hell, I do it sometimes but I would not impose myself on anyone by ogling, staring or trying to hook up - that's just disrespectful.

    I really have to say I love my gym, the general atmosphere is really laid back, people are there to work out, it's not a fucking runway, my trainer's great, and the guys are generally not dicks.
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    Dec 26, 2008 6:15 AM GMT
    I get the issue - no one likes intrusive, pushy sexual come-ons in an environment not designated for it. But like others here, I'm disturbed by the amount of ageism, sex phobia and meaness in many posts. Referring to people as disgusting, trolls, 'looking like they're on meds' - this sounds horribly like the way some right wing homophobe would describe gay men. Fantasies of violence toward sexually transgressive men would also be right up their alley.

    That being said I've never observed anything like this going on at my gym. No one has ever stared at me or harassed me. Maybe I'm just too old and ugly.
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    Dec 27, 2008 12:56 AM GMT
    Whats left to say, we have stall showers, I dont shower at my gym though.
    The locker room is small and the usual guys linger around naked, and it is weird and I guess sad, but I just get dressed and leave.

    No one bothers me on the gym floor, I glance around during my breaks its normal, but i never stare down anyone, I'm there to concentrate on me, and thats what I do.

    Peace, Jeff, NYC
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    Dec 27, 2008 4:24 AM GMT
    I shower and change at home. Mainly because the locker room and shower area are disgusting. No one wears shower shoes. Say hello to athletes foot and other germs. And unfortunately, guys use the sinks and showers to do their personal grooming. Everything from plucking nose hairs to trimming their body fur to dying their hair! And I really don't want to know what goes on in the steam room. icon_neutral.gif
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    Dec 27, 2008 7:09 AM GMT
    In some ways 2008 is a long ways from 1978, but in other ways not so far.

    Consider the possibility that the reason it seems to be "pathetic old men" isn't because all older men must necessarily be desperate for attention from younger men, but simply because these particular men (age 50+) are the remnant of a generation where direct, open, normalized homosexual social relationships weren't possible. For many millions of gay men, furtive park/restroom/gym/theater sex was the only way to BE gay. No dating, no gay churches, no corporate gay-straight alliance committees, no gay rugby leagues, no gay workout websites. Gay = gay sex, and gay sex was necessarily an exchange between casual strangers, not picking out china patterns and honeymoons to P-town. I think there are many gay men from a different generation (or from rural areas where the social/political liberties of the cities haven't fully filtered down) who were socialized into that mode of expressing their gay attractions and become addicted to the thrill of the "chance encounter" at the gym, and they seek it out over and over. Picking someone up at a gay bar wouldn't have the same thrill, because it requires both admitting to yourself that you are gay and in some ways establishing yourself as part of a "gay community". Chance encounters at the suburban gym, on the other hand, can be controlled and rationalized to where it isn't threatening to their illusion of selfhood.

    Assuming society maintains its current progressive trajectory, I think 20 years from now you will see many more older guys (e.g. those of us now in our 30s and 40s) in for a good workout, who may notice other men and catch their eye and instead of leaning back against the wall and stroking themselves in your direction, will just walk over (or wait until you're both finished, dressed, and leaving) and say "Hi, my name is Chad, and I just wanted to compliment you on your work ethic - you look great! Do you want to go next door and grab a protein shake or a smoothie or something?"

    Think about it -- isn't that what any of us would do now? If so, won't we continue behaving that way in the future?



  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 29, 2008 6:01 PM GMT
    very interesting perspective above...
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    Dec 29, 2008 6:11 PM GMT
    I've never seen that at my gym (24 Hr Fitness), but I am out in the "burbs" and it is a family gym (part of the reason why I like it). It's great to be able to strike-up a conversation with a guy and know that he's not trying to pick-up on you. I agree with several of the posters - if you encounter unaccepatable behavior call them out on it. If that doesn't work notify the management - that kind of activity is not good for business...
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    Dec 29, 2008 6:22 PM GMT
    I think the bottomline is that as long as there are gyms there will be cruising to some degree within them -- some obvious, some not so obvious. I've noticed over the years that gyms I've belonged to that just had basic locker rooms with no steam, sauna, or jacuzzi had less of a problem, to where those gyms that had steam rooms, etc were more of a breeding ground for such behavior. Probably why gyms like 24 Hour Fitness have opted for co-ed-type steam/sauna areas. It doesn't really annoy me all that much, I just ignore it, but it does irk me sometimes when I notice a guy heading to the wet area of the locker room when I arrive at the gym, and he's still in there lurking around an hour and a half later when I'm leaving.
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    May 31, 2016 1:47 PM GMT
    Not sure. I kinda want your problem. I am more bi-curious, i guess. Im in a committed relationship with a woman and dont want to physically cheat, but I would like to see a lot of what you dont. Is it possible to be straight but still get hot and bothered by seeing cock and want to fool around with guys behind closed doors?? I live in northwest Indiana....any where I can go to thrust your problem upon my self??
  • goodmagic

    Posts: 191

    May 31, 2016 8:40 PM GMT
    I find this a common occurrence in low price gyms. When I would go to a gym that was under 50 dollars a month you would see this habitual behaviour usually among older and corpulent gay and bisexual males. Higher price gyms like Equinox and New York Sports Club really don't have this issue. If they do it's usually more attractive gay guys jacking off. A overweight guy will not pay 220 dollars a month to jack off in a stream room. To avoid these guys learn their schedule and go when they are not there. I like to go to the gym at 5am in the morning. I personally am not upset with the guys who cruise. I am sure they have their reasons why they do so. I just look at them with pity because that's probably the only action they get. Now if you find yourself in a stream room with a hottie and the coast is clear why not?
  • FRE0

    Posts: 5011

    Jun 02, 2016 3:19 AM GMT
    I have never seen that sort of thing where I work out, i.e., Defined Fitness here in Albuquerque. However, when I lived in Minneapolis, I did see it from time to time at the downtown YMCA years ago. Once, when I was taking a shower and unable to see because I had soap on my face, I felt a guy trying to grope be. I struck out with my fist. Although I missed because I could see nothing, it had the desired effect and after that he was afraid of me and avoided me which was just fine.

    Another time was much more difficult. Just after I had changed to my workout clothes to use the indoor track, a black kid who was probably under age asked me where the weight room was. I thought nothing of it and told him. Later, when I was taking a shower, he took the shower directly opposite of mine and, while hard, proceeded to stare intently at me. The shower room had about 10 shower heads, 5 on each side of the room, and there were several other guys taking showers. I was amazed that the kid had so much cheek. He was very good looking and very well endowed, but I was not about to become involved in any way. To avoid getting hard myself I had to use all sorts of mental tricks; fortunately I was successful. I also turned my back to him. Then, to get a better view of me, he walked to the door to the swimming pool and looked out through it. After I finished showering, I walked to the drying area; he followed me and stood perhaps 3 feet from me as I dried myself; he was still hard. Then, still hard, he followed me to my locker, sat on a bench, and watched me dress. All this time I was careful not to look in his direction. I was happy to get out of there. I was exceedingly uncomfortable the entire time. Fortunately it did not happen again.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 02, 2016 1:22 PM GMT
    ^Then your alarm clock rang and you woke up.
  • Destinharbor

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    Jun 02, 2016 4:55 PM GMT
    goodmagic saidI find this a common occurrence in low price gyms. When I would go to a gym that was under 50 dollars a month you would see this habitual behaviour usually among older and corpulent gay and bisexual males. Higher price gyms like Equinox and New York Sports Club really don't have this issue. If they do it's usually more attractive gay guys jacking off. A overweight guy will not pay 220 dollars a month to jack off in a stream room. To avoid these guys learn their schedule and go when they are not there. I like to go to the gym at 5am in the morning. I personally am not upset with the guys who cruise. I am sure they have their reasons why they do so. I just look at them with pity because that's probably the only action they get. Now if you find yourself in a stream room with a hottie and the coast is clear why not?

    Not true! I've been hit on in many very high-end clubs including exclusive, private clubs. I think many guys just like the gym/locker room feel and naked guys walking around. Get's them horny. I don't cruise but I sure get horny and don't mind at all if I get hit on. And I've been hit on in Gold's gym a few times. Guys will be guys. As long as it isn't while I'm trying to do my work on the gym floor, I'm OK with it, in fact like it, as long as it doesn't get un-hygenic in the showers or steam. (I have taken to wearing shower sandals...)
  • FRE0

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    Jun 03, 2016 12:01 AM GMT
    Destinharbor said
    goodmagic saidI find this a common occurrence in low price gyms. When I would go to a gym that was under 50 dollars a month you would see this habitual behaviour usually among older and corpulent gay and bisexual males. Higher price gyms like Equinox and New York Sports Club really don't have this issue. If they do it's usually more attractive gay guys jacking off. A overweight guy will not pay 220 dollars a month to jack off in a stream room. To avoid these guys learn their schedule and go when they are not there. I like to go to the gym at 5am in the morning. I personally am not upset with the guys who cruise. I am sure they have their reasons why they do so. I just look at them with pity because that's probably the only action they get. Now if you find yourself in a stream room with a hottie and the coast is clear why not?

    Not true! I've been hit on in many very high-end clubs including exclusive, private clubs. I think many guys just like the gym/locker room feel and naked guys walking around. Get's them horny. I don't cruise but I sure get horny and don't mind at all if I get hit on. And I've been hit on in Gold's gym a few times. Guys will be guys. As long as it isn't while I'm trying to do my work on the gym floor, I'm OK with it, in fact like it, as long as it doesn't get un-hygenic in the showers or steam. (I have taken to wearing shower sandals...)


    " I like to go to the gym at 5am in the morning."

    I prefer to go to the gym at 5am in the afternoon.
  • craycraydoesd...

    Posts: 1047

    Jun 06, 2016 4:07 AM GMT
    Not4u said^Then your alarm clock rang and you woke up.


    Haha that's actually funny
  • Eleven

    Posts: 380

    Jun 06, 2016 6:14 AM GMT
    I just started a gym membership and have been a couple of times, there's no change rooms where i go so I don't have that problem though I would find it distracting because I've always been used to working out alone, now that I'm amongst other people I can feel people looking at me and its weird and awkward my mind is neurotic and it processes so much but I am enjoying the equipment so it outweights the awkwardness........yeh I go to a predominately straight gym so I don't think I get cruising looks, just "whos that guy" looks....I wouldn't know what a cruising look is they go straight over my head
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 06, 2016 1:14 PM GMT
    goodmagic saidI find this a common occurrence in low price gyms. When I would go to a gym that was under 50 dollars a month you would see this habitual behaviour usually among older and corpulent gay and bisexual males. Higher price gyms like Equinox and New York Sports Club really don't have this issue. If they do it's usually more attractive gay guys jacking off. A overweight guy will not pay 220 dollars a month to jack off in a stream room. To avoid these guys learn their schedule and go when they are not there. I like to go to the gym at 5am in the morning. I personally am not upset with the guys who cruise. I am sure they have their reasons why they do so. I just look at them with pity because that's probably the only action they get. Now if you find yourself in a stream room with a hottie and the coast is clear why not?


    New York Sports Club (NYSC) isn't a higher price gym. It recently started a $19.99 membership where you can only go to one gym and you have to bring your own towel...but people get around that and just go grab towels from behind the desk. NYSC stands for "New York Sex Club." It's a pretty much anything goes type of gym and I've seen everything there. A friend of mine told me he calls the guys who only go to the sauna "lobster boys" because of their redness. I also started to see some mentally disturbed guys there. One 'roided out guy would go into the steam room and sauna and get really pissed off. He would slam the door in the sauna really loudly when he left and start cursing in the shower about faggots, etc. Several people told me he's closeted. Another crazy guy started spitting on a guy in the sauna and they nearly got into an altercation. The last straw for me was when I found a soiled adult diaper in front of my locker after I showered. I switched to Crunch a few months ago and noticed a huge difference. In several of the locations, staff members are in the locker room quite a bit, so there isn't much cruising at those locations.

    Since I'm considered "elderly" in the gay community I try to be respectful, although it's hard not to notice a beautiful man...and I've seen plenty who love showing off in the locker room. I'm usually not creeped out unless a guy won't take "no" for an answer. There was one younger guy at NYSC who was pasty white and had absolutely no definition on his body. He tried to grab me in the sauna and I moved his hand...then he tried again and I left. He would stare at all of the guys with this starved look and wouldn't leave anyone alone...so it's not always creepy older men at the gym. Guys can be creeps at any age.

    By the way, it's interesting this thread from 2008 was revived.
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    Jun 12, 2016 2:13 AM GMT
    I also agree that it's not just the "low priced" gyms have this problem. My gym is just short of $160 a month, and we have this problem too. I'm not sure what goes on in the sauna/steamroom, but i know that I've been hit on by quite a few guys in the locker room, and they're so blatant to invite you into the shower stalls with them. I'm not into that, young or older... I had one guy my age, a few months ago, checking me out as I did my routine. He seemed shy, so I went up and started chatting with, "Hi, my name is Sean. Haven't seen you here before. Are you new?" Long story short, chat seemed pretty civil. I invited him to lunch, since he works not too far from me. He told me that he's letting me know he's not single. I said to him that it's ok... It's just lunch. We exchanged numbers. Shortly after, I got a text about him going into the sauna to "spend some time." I wasn't taking the bait, so I replied back, "Awesome. Have a great day!" He then proceeded to tell me that he would like me to join him, and he thought I was hot. The original conversation turned quite quickly. I declined his offer. Sure enough, I went past my "normal" shower time, thinking that this guy would be done by then. Nope... He was in one of the stalls, waiting for me, hardon and door open. I didn't even acknowledge him. Now he doesn't speak to me. In doing a little "research", come to have found out this guy got married to an older guy in July of 2014, and they had a huge wedding here. Sad that his partner probably doesn't even know. My thing is, if you're doing this with me, how many people do you do this with on a daily/weekly basis? These guys are just begging for sti's. No thanks.

    Cheers,

    Sean