Physical attraction?

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    Sep 26, 2007 5:19 PM GMT
    how important is physical attraction to a gay relationship? If this is a starting point to some relationships, is it safe to assume that lust is a crucial element to forming a commitment? I wonder if a guy can fall for another based on other factors beyond physical appearance....not that i am FUGLY and hopeless..! Just wondering.icon_rolleyes.gif
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    Sep 26, 2007 5:30 PM GMT
    I believe that physical attraction is very important in all relationships. Beginning or ending.

    Face it, if you're not attracted to someone, how can you be drawn to them. Fortunately, everyone is attracted to different things. Some people like muscle guys, some guys are drawn to slim guys etc. etc. etc.

    Even in friendships, there is something that draws you to people that you call friends. It can be emotional, mental or physical beauty. But there is a reason why you are drawn to a specific type of person.

    And it is my opinion, if you are not physically attracted to someone, I can't see how you are going to want to get naked with them. Not that everyone has to be a 10 in everyone else's eyes, just in your eyes. What YOU are attracted to.

    The law of Attraction you know.
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    Sep 26, 2007 6:40 PM GMT
    Physical attraction is very important, but often one doesn't realize that the energy of the person is even more important. The energy changes the perception of the physical. Positive energy, loving yourself, self-confidence, healthy outlook on life, enjoying the company of others, healthy sense of humor, all of that project onto people around you and translate into better looks in the eyes of others.

    On the other hand, friendship also changes the perception of looks. People who initially didn't impress me with their looks can impress me with their personality and heart after I've got to know them. Physical attraction do develop from that as well. We are conditioned to find people who bring fun and joy to our lives more attractive.

    Not to say that physical appearance isn't something we should pay attention to. Grooming, dress, and physical fitness play a big role in attractiveness. There aren't really universal standards; your grooming, dress, and body shape should fit your personality. Just like some people are attracted to chunky guys and others attracted to slim guys, some like hairy and some like smooth, some like light complexion and some like dark, you don't have to be an athlete or fashion model to be attractive to someone.
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    Sep 26, 2007 7:08 PM GMT
    I think it is somewhat important for first impressions. It may even be the thing the brings people together. As the relationship grows and evolves, other things tend to become more important. (trust, integrity, stability, personality, love, etc.)

    Working out, wearing the clothes I wear, how I cut my hair, etc., I do for me. I don't do it to be attractive to other people, I do it because it makes me feel good.

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    Sep 26, 2007 10:56 PM GMT
    I agree with Jorel1, the physical attraction only draws you in, it's up to personality, chemistry, intellect, compatibility, and ultimately an emotional connection, that keeps you interested and involved.

    No matter how hot you might think a guy is, there is someone else who's sick and tired of his shit. I read that in someone's profile once. I think it's pretty accurate.
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    Sep 26, 2007 11:35 PM GMT
    very true men... I think that you said it a little more eloquently than I did.
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    Sep 27, 2007 2:55 AM GMT
    There's something that catches your eye when you see a guy that draws you to him...or draws him to you. What happens beyond that is more than just physical attraction.

    The night I met my partner in 1969, I was at a bar on 9/26 that I didn't like (but it was closer than others), and unusually for that bar I saw five delicious guys that interested me. I picked the one standing next to me...danced with him....f__ked with him... and skipped the other four. The thing that kept us going was...he wrote me a "Thank You" note and said he would like to see me again. That began a whirlwind relationship that resulted in an exchange of rings on 11/1... same year.

    We're still together...and each year gets better than the last. What has kept us together is a lot of work, a lot of compromise, a lot of love, and remembering why we were together in the first place.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Sep 27, 2007 9:58 AM GMT
    without some kind of physical attraction what is there?
    You need attraction at least to get you to make an attempt for more

    What? You tripped and you penis was inserted in?
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    Sep 28, 2007 7:26 PM GMT
    The human mind is a unique thing. But not as beyond animalistic characteristics as we like to believe. Is physical charateristics important? You bet your ass they are. As scientist research they learn more and more about human attraction.

    One experiment with babies showed that even infants are naturally born with a concept of whats beautiful and whats physically unappealing.

    Yes a lot of relationships start from physical attraction, but this is not the only way people fall for one another.

    If any of you ever get the chance to fall for someone for their mind, you'll find that they're body, even if it is not necesarrily your type, will become the most irresistable thing ever.

  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Sep 29, 2007 12:04 AM GMT
    It does hold some much is hard to measure...I just know when I have dated 'nice guys' but the physical attraction was not as strong, the relationship crumbled for me...

    Of course, when I date the really attractive boys, I get treated like sh*t...and that relationship crumbles...hmmm...

    Damned if you do...damned if you don't?

    - David
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    Sep 30, 2007 10:58 AM GMT
    Want to be physically attracted, of course. Hope that I am likewise to others, yes, too. Since "being in lust" is a common visual response, I want to meet in person any guy with whom I have the "hots" for, because I want to have more than just another physical, sexual setup.icon_idea.gif
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    Oct 15, 2007 2:28 PM GMT
    Absolutely. Physical attraction is what intrigues us about another guy. But it isn't looks alone that you fall in love with. If that were the case, we would fall in love 100 times a day with every guy we thought was hot. It may get your blood pumping, but it is what is inside that you ulimately fall in love with. And it is what is inside that you may eventually end up hating!

    When you fall out of love, the looks are still there, you just can't stand the person underneath it. Haven't we all said after a bad relationship "how could I have been so in love with him?" There are guys I have dated and I can't stand to even look at now, yet anyone on the street would lust after.

    I believe that it is a combination of many factors. Looks are part of the passion, but it is the person inside you love, respect, cherish and adore.