Guys who keep lying about their age...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 01, 2014 9:49 AM GMT
    Ageism or lying doesn't set up for a good start to getting to know someone and don't forget ageism is not limited to just younger men discriminating against older men of which is not applicable to the OP from what I read of his comments. When.Older guys discriminate they do it in both direct and indirect ways of which the most common is disregarding a younger person expressing an opinion by mocking their lack of experience even if not relavenf to the point being discussed

    In the dating world There are many reasons why it is important to be honest about age at the very least to be within a 1-3 year range which most would consider acceptable. The examples of the 60yr old pretending to be 40 something surely the man in question must have realised that there would be little in common and that he would be obvious to see his real age.

    On the good side RJ member and friend NICKK is one youngster who hates agesim and I have (even as a close friend of his) copped a verbal wrath for mentioning age in conversation because in his logic its just a number and if someone loves u and has things in common with you that's all it should be
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    Nov 01, 2014 10:50 AM GMT
    I shake my head at some of these excuses. Ageism is not a justification for lying. People do have the right to discriminate on the basis of age when it comes to their love lives. You have the right to refuse to date an ageist but you shouldn't have the right to try and trick them.
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    Nov 01, 2014 1:46 PM GMT
    Jms31 saidWhy? I'm not going to think anything of you for being one year over 40 for example, but anyone that lies goes straight down in my estimation.

    It seems guys always ruin it just as we're getting to know each other. The worst one was back in winter. He told me online he was about late 40s. Met up on the day and he was nearer mid 60s icon_neutral.gif

    Can you forgive someone for lying about their age?


    What I find truly hilarious and bizarre: There are guys that I have spoken to years ago, both online and in real life.

    About 10 years ago they were 5-10 years older than I was at the time. Now they are 5-10 years younger than I am now. How did this happen?icon_lol.gif I would so love to borrow their TARDIS

    I don't see the point of lying.
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    Nov 01, 2014 1:52 PM GMT
    no sense in doing it either way: saying you're older or younger.

    i never even had a fake ID! always been honest with my age.and always expect others to do as well.
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    Nov 01, 2014 2:17 PM GMT
    Ageism is a funny topic. I can't handle guys my age that look their age. It's sad. Usually if they look their age they act and perform at that age. To me it's a turn off. But then again so are younger guys that can't keep up or have let themselves go. So what are your parameters and should you be concerned about the persons age or should you be basing your judgement on the dynamics of that person.

    This topic will keep coming up but I think you guys should be concerned about your aging. You can learn from some older guys, what to do and what not to do….. be careful…. take care of yourself …. someday you may be that old guy that nobody wants instead of that older guy that doesn't look it.
  • CuriousJockAZ

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    Nov 01, 2014 2:38 PM GMT
    I just tell people I'm forty Sixteen icon_biggrin.gif


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    Nov 01, 2014 2:39 PM GMT
    robbee333 said
    …. someday you may be that old guy that nobody wants instead of that older guy that doesn't look it.

    Very true. But some additional perspectives. And though initially it may sound like bragging, it ends with me eating humble pie.

    When I was your age (54) nobody could believe I was that old. Everyone though I was at least 10 years younger, or more. I had an 11-year-younger BF when I was 51, him 40, and guys would mistakenly think that **I** was the younger one! Man, that would piss him, and complicate our relationship, because he was a very vain professional actor, who had cosmetic surgery a when he was 42.

    But I also knew my family history. Both my parents were remarkably young looking into their late 50s, and I figured that would be my pattern, too. Yep, as I approached 60 I took a nose dive. And today at 65 I'm a total mess. icon_redface.gif

    Genes are the dominate factor. Lifestyle, diet, lots of things can also influence your appearance, and longevity, but genes are what underlies it all. I know what I inherited, and what to expect from them, and that's what I've experienced. I'm not complaining. I had a good run, and I'm still here, at least. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Nov 01, 2014 2:44 PM GMT
    CuriousJockAZ saidI just tell people I'm forty Sixteen icon_biggrin.gif

    LOL! Well, if your pics are any indication, you'd be a catch at any age you say. And I'm setting aside politics, to just talk about looks.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 24066

    Nov 01, 2014 2:49 PM GMT
    Art_Deco said
    CuriousJockAZ saidI just tell people I'm forty Sixteen icon_biggrin.gif

    LOL! Well, if your pics are any indication, you'd be a catch at any age. And I'm setting aside politics, to just talk about looks.



    Awwww, shucks -- thank you!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 01, 2014 2:54 PM GMT
    CuriousJockAZ said
    Art_Deco said
    CuriousJockAZ saidI just tell people I'm forty Sixteen icon_biggrin.gif

    LOL! Well, if your pics are any indication, you'd be a catch at any age. And I'm setting aside politics, to just talk about looks.

    Awwww, shucks -- thank you!

    YW icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 01, 2014 4:49 PM GMT
    Frankly, I'm impressed (and turned on too...) at the HOTT dudes well over 40 (even 50+) who've kept in great shape.

    ..and with that said, there are plenty of younger (late 20 - mid 30 yr old) guys who really like older, mature dudes...surprisingly! icon_lol.gif
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    Nov 01, 2014 6:50 PM GMT
    I do like guys who are a little bit over 40s. But yeah, it's about how they carry themselves and take care of themselves. There are guys who are like 38 and look very old, there are older guys who look extremely young. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Nov 01, 2014 7:05 PM GMT
    The day after my RL birthday I round up to the next year. I started this when I felt old and not so chicken anymore when I turned 25. By the time I turned 26 it was no big deal because I was saying that for just shorth of a year. Many times in person I'll round up ten. Never ever round down.
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    Nov 01, 2014 8:52 PM GMT
    I personally feel better about my looks the older I get and also find myself attracted to a wider range of guys, so it all works out and I don't feel the need to lie. One would hope as someone gets older they learn to get more comfortable with themselves or commit to change the things that make them insecure. It never makes sense to me to chat with and plan to meet someone and then lie about your something like your age. It's like lying about what hand you write with. Eventually, it will become evident you lied.
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    Nov 01, 2014 9:05 PM GMT
    LAXWill10 saidI do like guys who are a little bit over 40s. But yeah, it's about how they carry themselves and take care of themselves. There are guys who are like 38 and look very old, there are older guys who look extremely young. icon_biggrin.gif


    Lol thread's about lying, not another older-appreciation thread, you potato queen icon_lol.gif
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    Nov 01, 2014 9:16 PM GMT
    PatrickRyan saidI personally feel better about my looks the older I get and also find myself attracted to a wider range of guys, so it all works out and I don't feel the need to lie. One would hope as someone gets older they learn to get more comfortable with themselves or commit to change the things that make them insecure. It never makes sense to me to chat with and plan to meet someone and then lie about your something like your age. It's like lying about what hand you write with. Eventually, it will become evident you lied.

    Yeah, this. People need to accept the fact that there are way too many things to get insecure about if you look into the gay scene. We can only work on things which are under my control, like working out or getting a good job. I can't really change my race, looks or ageing. Neither I can make someone to like me. So why bother worrying about such things and lie.
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    Nov 01, 2014 11:18 PM GMT
    __morphic__ said
    PatrickRyan saidI personally feel better about my looks the older I get and also find myself attracted to a wider range of guys, so it all works out and I don't feel the need to lie. One would hope as someone gets older they learn to get more comfortable with themselves or commit to change the things that make them insecure. It never makes sense to me to chat with and plan to meet someone and then lie about your something like your age. It's like lying about what hand you write with. Eventually, it will become evident you lied.

    Yeah, this. People need to accept the fact that there are way too many things to get insecure about if you look into the gay scene. We can only work on things which are under my control, like working out or getting a good job. I can't really change my race, looks or ageing. Neither I can make someone to like me. So why bother worrying about such things and lie.

    I agree absolutely and that's how I've been. But given that I've been celibate for at least 20 years I can't help but wonder if it's been easier for me since I'm not seeking sex with other guys or looking for a boyfriend. If you're on the prowl for sex or a boyfriend then it's got to be hard to not worry about other guys thinking you're attractive.
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    Nov 02, 2014 2:30 AM GMT
    Being old and gay is hard. I don't like it when people lie about their age but I certainly understand why people do it.

    ptr-023_1z.jpg

    have a very rigid expensive skincare routine and get intraveneous glutathione and vitamin C at my dermatologist office to make sure I age as slowly as possibly.

    I'm already black so I can't afford to get old. icon_cool.gif
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    Nov 02, 2014 5:43 AM GMT
    OP: Somebody lied to you about a stat that's important to you. I get it. Granted, age is a key factor for determining the likelihood you'll find someone attractive. Being over 50 is a deal breaker for most guys in their 20's and even 30's...when it's and online encounter. In person....at least for me...not so much. It rarely even comes up. You will understand if you are blessed with staying fit into middle age. Being tricked into meeting someone who looks like shit deserves another thread altogether.
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    Nov 02, 2014 7:08 AM GMT
    I don't understand though how some older men complain about younger guys being ageist when they themselves do not seek out same aged men and instead pine for men much younger than themselves.
    Isn't that a little hypocritical?
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    Nov 02, 2014 8:08 AM GMT
    MartyredNeons saidI don't understand though how some older men complain about younger guys being ageist when they themselves do not seek out same aged men and instead pine for men much younger than themselves.
    Isn't that a little hypocritical?



    exactly
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    Nov 02, 2014 9:00 AM GMT
    MartyredNeons saidI don't understand though how some older men complain about younger guys being ageist when they themselves do not seek out same aged men and instead pine for men much younger than themselves.
    Isn't that a little hypocritical?

    yeah, pretty much this. Also, those older men would have been the biggest ageist when they were young. Even if some older guys are not into younger guys, they'll go all the way to display that by putting lines like no boys, only men or no twinks etc, on their profile. You would expect better from older guys who falunt their maturity as a desirable personality trait.
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    Nov 02, 2014 10:19 AM GMT
    From what I noticed there was certain age group of ppl lying about their age lol in between 30 and 35 icon_smile.gif they want to look younger or maybe they refuse to admit they're not children anymore. However I think it's entirely psychological thing and... it comes and goes
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    Nov 02, 2014 10:55 AM GMT
    my first bf lied about his age to me for the first 4 years of our relationship i thought we were the same age but he was 2 years older lol hes a smart ass like that
  • BloodFlame

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    Nov 02, 2014 11:05 AM GMT
    I don't think I've ever been lied to when it came to age. I certainly don't see the point in lying because either the truth will come out or when you go to meet, you will may not be able to pass for the age you claim you are. So it's better to be upfront I think.

    That said, I do understand why some men do it. I do feel that there is a certain cutoff point for gay guys after 40 which is lame because you can still be older and have lots of energy and not let life slow you down.

    I guess I say this because I feel that even when I get older, I won't lose sight of my inner creative side which some people dub childish. I hope I have the confidence to be comfortable with myself when I reach that age as I intend to take the best care of myself I can.

    But yeah, if a guy lied to me about his age, while I would understand, I'd become a little a wary of the guy because he lied about that, it'd make me wonder what else he may be lying about. icon_neutral.gif