Do you have a friend who intentionally spreads HIV?

  • FRE0

    Posts: 4998

    Nov 27, 2014 10:06 PM GMT
    David3K said
    hentailover saidI know enough HIV-poz guys who treat non-disclosure as a white lie (because they blame society for forcing them to do this just to get laid), to know that gift-giving is more of a selfish rather than a predatory behavior. It's not the "villains out there" but the "attitudes among us"

    They blame society? They should blame themselves for not using a condom when having sex. Sadly barebacking is very common among gay men and I've noticed after they get infected they ussually are one of this

    - they advocate protection and try to warn others about what happened to them
    - become very bitter towards society and hate neg people or can't accept some just prefer not to have sex with them
    - become gift givers


    How many men use condoms for oral sex?
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:18 AM GMT
    David3K said
    timmm55 said
    hentailover saidI think anyone with HIV or any STI is morally obligated to disclose their status before even safe sex, and without being asked, otherwise the other guy doesn't have informed consent to take the risk, (condoms fail ya know). Sounds like timmm or muchmorethanmuscle might disagree with that, given their narrow focus on barebacking...?


    Narrow focus? I'm an advocate for Gay and HIV rights. It has little to do with condomless sex really. It's because of people like you and Art Deco, Scuffy, Sydney, David and others who vilify anyone who is POZ or Undetectable (and can't tell the fucking difference!) That's why we only have a 30% undetectable rate. Australia is 62% and they are new to the protocols.

    This site is full of moralizing, stigmatizing, reactionary knee jerkers. Truly stupid people for the most part, and oddly proud of it it seems.


    WRONG!
    1 - we don't vilify "just anyone who is poz", only the ones that advocate unhealthy practices like you. You have expressed that many times in your posts. There are other RJ posters, also HIV+ (Gamerican comes to mind) who are nothing like you; they advocate protection and the use of condoms. They try to help people not to make their same mistakes and they earned all my respect. Basically I wish there were more like them and less like you.

    2 - Don't try to confuse people with your shit. You have a selfish and very clear motivation in everything you say. You're toxic.

    Get it into your mind that undetectable people are also HIV+. One is part of the other, even though you hate that fact. Undetectable viral load is still risky. Let alone that someone who is undetectable one day might become detectable the other. And more importantly; people should never trust in the apparent status of their hookups. Believing someone saying "im undetectable" is as stupid as believing someone saying "I'm neg" - you don't know that - sometimes they don't know that or could be liying. Just like this guy here said "treat all your sex partners as if they were poz and take care of yourself".



    "Just like this guy here said "treat all your sex partners as if they were poz and take care of yourself"." That's only truth in your post!

    I'm toxic and unhealthy?
    (I've been Undetectable for 10 years. No semen viral shedding is shown after 3 years. My blood work is normal.)
    In your stigma I have to be! Otherwise you have to create other stigmas like:.....STD breeding, and God knows what else is next.

    READ THIS......AGAIN

    There are now at least five strategies that reasonably constitute ‘safe sex, provided that certain parameters are met. They are:
    1.
    The use of Condoms during casual encounters between men of unknown or discordant serostatus.
    2.
    HIV negative men taking effective pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP).
    3.
    Men living with HIV who only have sex without condoms when they have a sustained undetectable viral load (UVL) and in the absence
    of sexually transmissible infections (STIs).
    4.
    Effective use of serosorting between HIV positive men.
    5.
    Effective negotiated safety agreements.

    http://www.acon.org.au/sites/default/files/What-is-Safe-Sex-Position-2014.pdf

    In the past “unprotected sex” has been understood to reflect sex without a condom. However, with recent advances in biomedical technologies and
    new knowledge about the efficacy of treatments in
    preventing onward transmission, the established orthodoxy of "safe sex"has changed.


    Gamerican, just regurgitates all the 90s rhetoric. Not BAD information, but not current either. He tells people on RJ just to use condoms.....not bad advice considering the intellect level on here (in the basement). Notice he doesn't disagree with me. He knows, and tacitly agrees.

    I have to wonder about people like David. They find the most repulsive elements of society. And then affixes it (gift giving, STD breeding, etc) to people he deems "toxic and unhealthy"....who aren't. Truly a sick mind to even find that stuff, stuff I've never heard of. And certainly haven't done.

    THIS is what stigma looks, sounds and smells like. In David's brain there is a cesspool of crap, oozing to get out.

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    Nov 28, 2014 12:28 AM GMT
    "undetectable people are also HIV+. One is part of the other, even though you hate that fact."

    And that is so wrong!

    Hate it??? I'm POZ and damn proud of speaking out about prejudice. AGAINST people like you. I am Undetectable and proud of that too. Only 30% of Americans are. It should be a goal of everyone who is positive.

    If there was a cure tomorrow I will self-identify as POZ for the rest of my life.

    Just saying "undetectable people are also HIV+" is so patronizing (as if I didn't know that!). I've lived (well BTW) with HIV since 1987. If that's your contribution you are utterly worthless. Worse, with your stigmatizing you are less than worthless. You are the detriment to society....the scum of the earth you research and post about.
  • whytehot

    Posts: 1343

    Nov 28, 2014 12:29 AM GMT
    "Stigma" is mentioned more often than "safe" on this thread rolleyes.gif
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:39 AM GMT
    whytehot said"Stigma" is mentioned more often than "safe" on this thread rolleyes.gif


    Please DO count them! sarcasm

    Let me guess, you have a profile that says: "clean", DDF, no Blacks, no Asians, no Fems???? And you don't stimatize?

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    Nov 28, 2014 12:40 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    Force saidI recently learned that a friend of mine that I have had for over three years does not use protection with all of his partners. He is open about his HIV status and I know he takes medication. He is a very bitter person, which is the main reason I never liked him in a romantic way, and he has this whole "well no one told me" bullshit outlook on the situation.

    IF you found out a friend of yours does this would you address them about it. I just left it alone with no real response or judgements.


    This this a young black scenario? I noticed Muscleboundfem (who is also young and black) agreed that this has happened to him also, and says it's common. I don't see it as common in the older white (or Black/Hispanic) group I am in.

    http://www.scpr.org/news/2014/11/26/48297/young-black-gay-and-living-with-hiv-but-not-on-tre/

    Young black men have the highest rates of new HIV in the country.


    The guy who didn't tell me his status was white if you feel race needs to be brought into this. I don't remember the op stating the race of his HIV positive friend.
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:49 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    JoePC90 said
    Force saidI recently learned that a friend of mine that I have had for over three years does not use protection with all of his partners. He is open about his HIV status and I know he takes medication.









    ( He is a very bitter person, which is the main reason I never liked him in a romantic way, and he has this whole "well no one told me" bullshit outlook on the situation.(This opinion not a fact).

    IF you found out a friend of yours does this would you address them about it. I just left it alone with no real response or judgements.


    What a bastard.


    Is he? In green it says he is on meds (undetectable?), he is open about his HIV status and doesn't use protection with all his partners. That implies he does use "protection" (which I assume he means condoms) with SOME of his partners.

    The rest is conjecture and immaterial.

    If he is Undetectable, like PrEP, it is considered "protection" alone or in combination with condoms.

    There are now at least five strategies that reasonably constitute ‘safe sex', provided that certain parameters are met. Theyare:
    1.
    The use of Condoms during casual encounters between men of unknown or discordant serostatus.
    2.
    HIV negative men taking effective pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP)
    .
    3.
    Men living with HIV who only have sex without condoms when they have a sustained undetectable viral load (UVL) and in the absence
    of sexually transmissible infections (STIs).

    4.
    Effective use of serosorting between HIV positive men.
    5.
    Effective negotiated safety agreements

    http://www.acon.org.au/sites/default/files/What-is-Safe-Sex-Position-2014.pdf


    In fact, the title "Do you have a friend who intentionally spreads HIV?" is totally misleading. Is the OP assuming Undetectable is causing the spread of HIV? We don't know if he is spreading HIV even if he is NOT undetectable, since he is "open about his status" and uses "protection" with "some" of his partners. He may be sero-sorting with other POZ guys and not using protection. He may get an STD but he's not spreading HIV. He may be using protection with the Negative guys he's "open" with.

    I don't see how he is a bastard at all, he's open about his status, he using protection when appropriate. He's on his Meds. If he isn't Undetectable yet, that should be his goal.


    The 13th post in the thread makes it very clear that his friend doesn't tell those who do not ask. Even you yourself said its morally wrong not to disclose your status. The person you are quoting simply called him a bastard. A legitimate insult to hurl at someone doing something morally objectionable.
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:52 AM GMT
    Ex_Mil8 said
    timmm55 saidI love how people leave these misleading SHITBOMBS, never come back to clarify.....yet people like David thrive on this crap. Only to create another shit stirring stew.


    Yes, these sort of threads do seem to follow a familiar pattern: Stooge (usually with minimal posting history) makes elaborate claim regarding outrageous sexual conduct of a 'friend'. Usual suspects (or their latest sock puppets) weigh-in with dubious sexual anecdotes and complain about what dreadful human beings gay men generally are.


    Gay men really aren't bad. They are just delusional as fuck like most people. I guess that is the former Buddhist in me talking though.
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:52 AM GMT
    muscleboundfem said
    timmm55 said
    Force saidI recently learned that a friend of mine that I have had for over three years does not use protection with all of his partners. He is open about his HIV status and I know he takes medication. He is a very bitter person, which is the main reason I never liked him in a romantic way, and he has this whole "well no one told me" bullshit outlook on the situation.

    IF you found out a friend of yours does this would you address them about it. I just left it alone with no real response or judgements.


    This this a young black scenario? I noticed Muscleboundfem (who is also young and black) agreed that this has happened to him also, and says it's common. I don't see it as common in the older white (or Black/Hispanic) group I am in.

    http://www.scpr.org/news/2014/11/26/48297/young-black-gay-and-living-with-hiv-but-not-on-tre/

    Young black men have the highest rates of new HIV in the country.


    The guy who didn't tell me his status was white if you feel race needs to be brought into this. I don't remember the op stating the race of his HIV positive friend.


    I was curious if there was sort of a connection. It's not a racist comment. There is plenty of evidence, certainly in DC, regarding increased incidence of young black men and HIV.

    "The District of Columbia has been disproportionately impacted by the epidemic, and communities of color and women are increasingly at risk. African Americans accounted for 75% of HIV cases while only accounting for 49% of the D.C. population. In fact, 5.7% of African American men are living with HIV. African American women represent 92% of female HIV cases."
    http://www.washingtonaidspartnership.org/about/hivaids-in-the-greater-washington-region/
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:56 AM GMT
    timmm55 said"undetectable people are also HIV+. One is part of the other, even though you hate that fact."

    And that is so wrong!

    Hate it??? I'm POZ and damn proud of speaking out about prejudice. AGAINST people like you. I am Undetectable and proud of that too. Only 30% of Americans are. It should be a goal of everyone who is positive.

    If there was a cure tomorrow I will self-identify as POZ for the rest of my life.

    Just saying "undetectable people are also HIV+" is so patronizing (as if I didn't know that!). I've lived (well BTW) with HIV since 1987. If that's your contribution you are utterly worthless. Worse, with your stigmatizing you are less than worthless. You are the detriment to society....the scum of the earth you research and post about.


    Please calm down. Its obvious you have experienced a lot of pain from people stigmatizing you. However lashing out in such a hateful manner is counter productive.
  • whytehot

    Posts: 1343

    Nov 28, 2014 12:57 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    whytehot said"Stigma" is mentioned more often than "safe" on this thread rolleyes.gif


    Please DO count them! sarcasm

    Let me guess, you have a profile that says: "clean", DDF, no Blacks, no Asians, no Fems???? And you don't stimatize?



    I'd do poz guys, if they're honest, and don't spend their time online advocating "low-viral-load" barebacking. I only stigmatize evil people who put their emotional comfort above the safety of others.

    No blacks tho rolleyes.gif
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    Nov 28, 2014 12:59 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    muscleboundfem said
    timmm55 said
    Force saidI recently learned that a friend of mine that I have had for over three years does not use protection with all of his partners. He is open about his HIV status and I know he takes medication. He is a very bitter person, which is the main reason I never liked him in a romantic way, and he has this whole "well no one told me" bullshit outlook on the situation.

    IF you found out a friend of yours does this would you address them about it. I just left it alone with no real response or judgements.


    This this a young black scenario? I noticed Muscleboundfem (who is also young and black) agreed that this has happened to him also, and says it's common. I don't see it as common in the older white (or Black/Hispanic) group I am in.

    http://www.scpr.org/news/2014/11/26/48297/young-black-gay-and-living-with-hiv-but-not-on-tre/

    Young black men have the highest rates of new HIV in the country.


    The guy who didn't tell me his status was white if you feel race needs to be brought into this. I don't remember the op stating the race of his HIV positive friend.


    I was curious if there was sort of a connection. It's not a racist comment. There is plenty of evidence, certainly in DC, regarding increased incidence of young black men and HIV.

    "The District of Columbia has been disproportionately impacted by the epidemic, and communities of color and women are increasingly at risk. African Americans accounted for 75% of HIV cases while only accounting for 49% of the D.C. population. In fact, 5.7% of African American men are living with HIV. African American women represent 92% of female HIV cases."
    http://www.washingtonaidspartnership.org/about/hivaids-in-the-greater-washington-region/


    If you were curious you could have asked about the race of the person that I slept with. You do a disservice to your argument by trying to create an, "other".
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    Nov 28, 2014 1:03 AM GMT
    whytehot said"Stigma" is mentioned more often than "safe" on this thread rolleyes.gif


    I'm sure condom is mentioned more often
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    Nov 28, 2014 1:03 AM GMT
    muscleboundfem said
    timmm55 said"undetectable people are also HIV+. One is part of the other, even though you hate that fact."

    And that is so wrong!

    Hate it??? I'm POZ and damn proud of speaking out about prejudice. AGAINST people like you. I am Undetectable and proud of that too. Only 30% of Americans are. It should be a goal of everyone who is positive.

    If there was a cure tomorrow I will self-identify as POZ for the rest of my life.

    Just saying "undetectable people are also HIV+" is so patronizing (as if I didn't know that!). I've lived (well BTW) with HIV since 1987. If that's your contribution you are utterly worthless. Worse, with your stigmatizing you are less than worthless. You are the detriment to society....the scum of the earth you research and post about.


    Please calm down. Its obvious you have experienced a lot of pain from people stigmatizing you. However lashing out in such a hateful manner is counter productive.


    Ironically only on here! In my real world....little to none. Check David's post. He changes his name frequently. I don't suffer fools gladly.

    And in a fashion, I hope to educate some people about HIV. The disinformation on here is rampant.
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    Nov 28, 2014 1:14 AM GMT
    muscleboundfem said
    timmm55 said
    muscleboundfem said
    timmm55 said
    Force saidI recently learned that a friend of mine that I have had for over three years does not use protection with all of his partners. He is open about his HIV status and I know he takes medication. He is a very bitter person, which is the main reason I never liked him in a romantic way, and he has this whole "well no one told me" bullshit outlook on the situation.

    IF you found out a friend of yours does this would you address them about it. I just left it alone with no real response or judgements.


    This this a young black scenario? I noticed Muscleboundfem (who is also young and black) agreed that this has happened to him also, and says it's common. I don't see it as common in the older white (or Black/Hispanic) group I am in.

    http://www.scpr.org/news/2014/11/26/48297/young-black-gay-and-living-with-hiv-but-not-on-tre/

    Young black men have the highest rates of new HIV in the country.


    The guy who didn't tell me his status was white if you feel race needs to be brought into this. I don't remember the op stating the race of his HIV positive friend.


    I was curious if there was sort of a connection. It's not a racist comment. There is plenty of evidence, certainly in DC, regarding increased incidence of young black men and HIV.

    "The District of Columbia has been disproportionately impacted by the epidemic, and communities of color and women are increasingly at risk. African Americans accounted for 75% of HIV cases while only accounting for 49% of the D.C. population. In fact, 5.7% of African American men are living with HIV. African American women represent 92% of female HIV cases."
    http://www.washingtonaidspartnership.org/about/hivaids-in-the-greater-washington-region/


    If you were curious you could have asked about the race of the person that I slept with. You do a disservice to your argument by trying to create an, "other".


    I did ask: "This this a young black scenario?" ....it's a legitimate question. For youths in general it was up 132%, where it was down or up slightly for other Gay groups.

    ....an "other"?


    "For advocates and public health officials trying to end HIV, young men like Adonis Austin represent a growing challenge. Black men who have sex with men now account for nearly a quarter of the nation’s 50,000 new HIV infections annually, a vastly disproportionate share considering their small numbers in the population."

    http://www.scpr.org/news/2014/11/26/48297/young-black-gay-and-living-with-hiv-but-not-on-tre/
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    Nov 28, 2014 2:19 AM GMT
    whytehot said
    timmm55 said
    whytehot said"Stigma" is mentioned more often than "safe" on this thread rolleyes.gif


    Please DO count them! sarcasm

    Let me guess, you have a profile that says: "clean", DDF, no Blacks, no Asians, no Fems???? And you don't stimatize?



    I'd do poz guys, if they're honest, and don't spend their time online advocating "low-viral-load" barebacking. I only stigmatize evil people who put their emotional comfort above the safety of others.

    No blacks tho rolleyes.gif


    +1
    Best description of Unkabasa/Timmmm55 Ive ever seen.
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    Nov 28, 2014 2:24 AM GMT
    timmm55 said
    muscleboundfem said
    timmm55 said"undetectable people are also HIV+. One is part of the other, even though you hate that fact."

    And that is so wrong!

    Hate it??? I'm POZ and damn proud of speaking out about prejudice. AGAINST people like you. I am Undetectable and proud of that too. Only 30% of Americans are. It should be a goal of everyone who is positive.

    If there was a cure tomorrow I will self-identify as POZ for the rest of my life.

    Just saying "undetectable people are also HIV+" is so patronizing (as if I didn't know that!). I've lived (well BTW) with HIV since 1987. If that's your contribution you are utterly worthless. Worse, with your stigmatizing you are less than worthless. You are the detriment to society....the scum of the earth you research and post about.


    Please calm down. Its obvious you have experienced a lot of pain from people stigmatizing you. However lashing out in such a hateful manner is counter productive.


    Ironically only on here! In my real world....little to none. Check David's post. He changes his name frequently. I don't suffer fools gladly.

    And in a fashion, I hope to educate some people about HIV. The disinformation on here is rampant.


    You have previously said that in your life you have contact with other HIV+ only - of course you're not gonna be stigmatized by them.

    And what name change? I used to be David3000 and now Im David3k, that's not even a secret.

    I feel sorry for the misinformed people that cross your path. You're the worst kind of trash with transparent selfish motivations.
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    Nov 28, 2014 3:14 AM GMT
    [quote][cite]David3K said[/cite]

    I feel sorry for the misinformed people that cross your path.


    Feel sorry for yourself.
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    Nov 28, 2014 3:16 AM GMT
    David3K said
    whytehot said
    timmm55 said
    whytehot said"Stigma" is mentioned more often than "safe" on this thread rolleyes.gif


    Please DO count them! sarcasm

    Let me guess, you have a profile that says: "clean", DDF, no Blacks, no Asians, no Fems???? And you don't stimatize?



    I'd do poz guys, if they're honest, and don't spend their time online advocating "low-viral-load" barebacking. I only stigmatize evil people who put their emotional comfort above the safety of others.

    No blacks tho rolleyes.gif


    +1
    Best description of Unkabasa/Timmmm55 Ive ever seen.



    pfft
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    Nov 28, 2014 3:34 AM GMT
    Timmmm55 has this on his profile: "Undetectable is the NEW negative Google it!"

    What a piece of shit you are.
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    Nov 28, 2014 5:25 AM GMT
    It's interesting you asked this. I would say no.

    But here's what happened to me yesterday
    I am currently in Toronto visiting friends for thanksgiving. I was introduced to this guy from the states, very good looking, green blue eyes, light brown hair, so fit. We hit it off. He's very accomplished for his age, PHD, muscular-great body. He was shaved everywhere that's how hot his body was.
    I normally don't hook up with people after knowing them for a week. But he was open to a long distance relationship, having just moved from the US to Toronto a year back. I thought this guy was great. There was nothing for me to dislike about him.

    However once we went back to his place. Which was in Yorkville. Amazing rental apartment and I saw he only read GQ. Which explained how sharp he dressed.
    I couldn't help it when he made a move, my clothes came off. Like I said it was very unlike me. However when it came to doing the deed. He wanted only bareback action. I told him I didn't know him well enough to risk it. He got kind of upset and said he hooks up randomly with people and only does bareback. He claimed it was impossible for him to get hard without bare backing. It killed the mood.
    Before I knew what happened( it was that rushed) we were putting our clothes on and saying goodbye. My hopes were dashed.
    Would I have still risked losing this GQ looking Vice President/dream guy who works for a major financial institution that I could so see myself falling for knowing he would be pissed about the bare back refusal? Yes absolutely
    I might never come across such a catch again (Nor have I ever come across such a catch before) but it was worth it knowing I wont have to worry about stds or rushing to the ER for PEP.
    So if I could lose the man of my dreams you should be able to dump this friend before he makes another victim.
    If a guy does not have the decency to care about infecting himself or another person then how sincere could he possibly be with you?
    Or at least that's what I tell myself. When I look at my picturess with my what if husband.
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    Nov 28, 2014 5:47 AM GMT
    I have met a few, but having also seen untreated AIDS (from other countries), I cannot imagine who could willingly try to give that to others.

    The person I knew was a prostitute, she contracted it and intentionally tried to give it to others.

    Then she found Jesus and apparently she's all good now. *sarcasm*
  • Sincityfan

    Posts: 409

    Nov 28, 2014 6:37 AM GMT
    what the fuck?
    Report those assholes to the authority. Lying about your status/ intentionally spreading HIV is a crime.
    Send those jerks to prison.
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    Nov 28, 2014 5:46 PM GMT
    canadian_stud saidIt's interesting you asked this. I would say no.

    But here's what happened to me yesterday
    I am currently in Toronto visiting friends for thanksgiving. I was introduced to this guy from the states, very good looking, green blue eyes, light brown hair, so fit. We hit it off. He's very accomplished for his age, PHD, muscular-great body. He was shaved everywhere that's how hot his body was.
    I normally don't hook up with people after knowing them for a week. But he was open to a long distance relationship, having just moved from the US to Toronto a year back. I thought this guy was great. There was nothing for me to dislike about him.

    However once we went back to his place. Which was in Yorkville. Amazing rental apartment and I saw he only read GQ. Which explained how sharp he dressed.
    I couldn't help it when he made a move, my clothes came off. Like I said it was very unlike me. However when it came to doing the deed. He wanted only bareback action. I told him I didn't know him well enough to risk it. He got kind of upset and said he hooks up randomly with people and only does bareback. He claimed it was impossible for him to get hard without bare backing. It killed the mood.
    Before I knew what happened( it was that rushed) we were putting our clothes on and saying goodbye. My hopes were dashed.
    Would I have still risked losing this GQ looking Vice President/dream guy who works for a major financial institution that I could so see myself falling for knowing he would be pissed about the bare back refusal? Yes absolutely
    I might never come across such a catch again (Nor have I ever come across such a catch before) but it was worth it knowing I wont have to worry about stds or rushing to the ER for PEP.
    So if I could lose the man of my dreams you should be able to dump this friend before he makes another victim.
    If a guy does not have the decency to care about infecting himself or another person then how sincere could he possibly be with you?
    Or at least that's what I tell myself. When I look at my picturess with my what if husband.



    Good for you for making the healthy decision! A lot of guys would not. The guy was obviously HIV+. You can be a barebacker or you can be HIV-, but can't be both (for long.)
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    Nov 28, 2014 5:52 PM GMT
    MuchMoreThanMuscle said
    David3K said^ In case there was any doubt that MMTA advocates bareback sex icon_rolleyes.gif And then he has the guts to say the link about gift givers had nothing to do with this topic. Whenever he posts that link is spot on.


    In case there was any doubt that the educational standards of low-end South American countries were well below average simply reference Gayvid's obvious lack of comprehension skills as blatant evidence.



    Not as low as the educational standards in Everett, Washington apparently. It would seem they don't teach the poor White trash there how to have safe sex. That is one huge glass house you live in!