Is he interested? Should I initiate?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 06, 2014 3:38 PM GMT
    This situation might seem a bit weird. I can't really tell what's going on with myself or X

    We're both in the same school in the same program. X is a few years older than me, which is fine. He's the president of GSA and I'm the treasurer. I've been more or less "stalking" him on facebook and a dating app. We're friend on facebook; never talk unless it's club related. We rarely like each other statuses.

    On the dating app, we don't talk, just frequently look at each other's profile. It lets me know when he's looking at my profile and vice-versa. It's like he's waiting for me to message him or something. Well, that's what I'm waiting for anyway. This has been going on for a whole semester.

    Whenever I see him, I feel really uncomfortable and act differently around him. I tend not to look at his face/eyes. I don't know if I'm crushing on him but something is off. We're not close friends or anything. It's weird and I don't know how to feel about it.

    I can't tell when someone's flirting with me. And I'm not the type to initiate the first move. I don't want it to be awkward since we're in the same club. What if it turns out to be nothing.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 06, 2014 5:04 PM GMT
    It will turn out to be nothing if one of you doesn't do something. Learning to make the first move or initiate conversation with a guy you like can be uncomfortable at first, but the more you work at it, the more confident you will become. You don't have to make some bold, overt statement about your feelings for him. You both know you've been checking out each others' profiles, so maybe make a comment about something he likes on his profile. Try inviting him to join you and some other friends for a casual outing. Suggest and idea for the GSA and offer to assist with it. The more opportunities you create to talk to him, the more you will know if you are even compatible and if he might be interested. If you find you like talking to him, then take the next step and ask him out. He may be having the same thoughts about you, and if neither of you do anything, you both will always wonder.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 5234

    Dec 06, 2014 5:11 PM GMT
    Ya, you're def crushing. Nothing wrong with that. It's how love starts. Like PR said above^^^, find something on his profile that interests you and say something IN PERSON to him about it, referencing that you saw it on his profile. That will start the conversation and communicate a lot of information and also make it OK for him to admit checking out yours. Don't worry about your feelings of discomfort. Stage fright! Enjoy it!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 06, 2014 8:12 PM GMT
    I'll talk to him at a party we're both going to. Being buzzed always get me out of shell. Hopefully, I won't do anything embarrassing
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Dec 07, 2014 5:41 AM GMT
    It is really hard to know if he is interested or not. I am kinda in the same situation, but you really have him in your crossfire! I really think you should make a move! But start small.

    Perhaps tell him about events/ideas that you have for the GSA? This will break the ice between you to. I personally call this the "mouse-trap technique" (He is the mouse, you are the trap, and your words are the cheese, and what you do will determine the aroma of the cheese) icon_wink.gif. THIS IS VERY CRUCIAL! Come up with cool things for the club to get involved in. Literally make a list, and read it to him, pull him aside: "Hey, I want you to hear about the cool ideas, that I have that can help improve GSA, and get more members involved". Show him that you are passionate and dedicated its a huge turn-on! He will naturally "love" that since he is the president or whatever. But it will really make him more inclined to be comfortable around you. Once you have broken the ice, everything else will fall into place --- "like poison" icon_twisted.gif. Keep doing this, keep coming up with things the club to do! Make it fun! He WILL get closer and closer to you! THEN SNAP! You've caught yourself a mouse!

    The rest is icing on the cake! icon_biggrin.gif

    "I find it funny that I can give other people advice, but when it comes to me I got nothing"~GrumpyDinosaurs