Are masculine bisexual men more open to dating feminine gay men?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 29, 2015 6:17 AM GMT
    Don't waste your time with bi guys...

    Well like what you said, yes, [many] masculine gay men are into masculine gay men. I'm generally attracted to other masculine gay men. Although some slightly feminine gay men can win my heart.

    You considering bi guys sounds like you just gave up or something. I think the issue is the desire to date. I'm single and enjoy it. I don't care so much for dating. My advice is to not care so much about it. Because when you do, you start twisting your own mind. I went through a phase where I kept on telling myself "you're ugly, you're undesired, you're no one's." All because I cared too much and found it extremely difficult to find a date.
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    Jan 31, 2015 6:30 AM GMT
    No doubt that wide-sweeping generalizations here would be pretty useless. It sure always boils down to the two people involved.

    Societal environment may be playing some role here, too.

    Some cultures, say Eastern Mediterranean used to largely view tops as actually being str8 guys who were waiting to get married, find a willing GF, etc. ... So, if you looked masculine by their standards, it was only desirable for you to date a bottom dude who had some feminine traits. Everyone "knew" who was topping in that relationship, and that was basically the only thing that mattered.

    Typical bottom-shaming attitudes have abated recently, and other males who were used to policing their friends' sexuality look and feel pretty much out of place these days.

    Which leaves some masc. men dating fem. guys either because they like them on a personal basis, or because they still want their environment to assume that they are str8 dudes going through some situational homosexuality.

    SC
  • NeuralShock

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    Jan 31, 2015 6:47 AM GMT
    I wouldn't place much value on a bisexual male staying loyal to a gay male partner to be honest, I've seen 20-1 ratio of them leaving for females and throwing their male partners into the garbagecan.
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    Jan 31, 2015 7:12 PM GMT
    Most of the ones I met like the more feminine guys. However they never stick around. You can't make a bisexual commit to a man.
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    Jan 31, 2015 7:33 PM GMT
    I am somewhat masculine and love all kinds of men. What I like in a feminine man is for him to be smaller and like to bottom and just the opposite with a big macho stud. I think the size thing is more important to me tho. I like topping smaller or bottoming for bigger guys. LOL
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    Feb 02, 2015 6:59 AM GMT
    NeuralShock saidI wouldn't place much value on a bisexual male staying loyal to a gay male partner to be honest, I've seen 20-1 ratio of them leaving for females and throwing their male partners into the garbagecan.


    That's true. As dick and pussy are completely different, they just want pussy in the end. After all they are mostly tops and only want more options to fuck. I actually pledged myself to never do anything with bisexual guys. What bi guys are...well, they're tricks.
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    Feb 02, 2015 1:07 PM GMT
    If I have come to learn anything in life, it is that there is an infinite variety of sexual interests out there. I prefer very masculine men and very feminine women, but specifically what those qualities mean to me, not how you define them. And I reserve the right to make exceptions.
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    Feb 02, 2015 1:12 PM GMT
    wesv said
    NeuralShock saidI wouldn't place much value on a bisexual male staying loyal to a gay male partner to be honest, I've seen 20-1 ratio of them leaving for females and throwing their male partners into the garbagecan.


    That's true. As dick and pussy are completely different, they just want pussy in the end. After all they are mostly tops and only want more options to fuck. I actually pledged myself to never do anything with bisexual guys. What bi guys are...well, they're tricks.


    And that is how some straights view gay men. Only interested in easy sex and no real commitments. What happened to celebrating the rainbow of differences people come in? This attitude of prejudiced assumptions and stereotypes just hurts everyone.
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    Feb 02, 2015 5:49 PM GMT
    strongbull said
    wesv said
    NeuralShock saidI wouldn't place much value on a bisexual male staying loyal to a gay male partner to be honest, I've seen 20-1 ratio of them leaving for females and throwing their male partners into the garbagecan.


    That's true. As dick and pussy are completely different, they just want pussy in the end. After all they are mostly tops and only want more options to fuck. I actually pledged myself to never do anything with bisexual guys. What bi guys are...well, they're tricks.


    And that is how some straights view gay men. Only interested in easy sex and no real commitments. What happened to celebrating the rainbow of differences people come in? This attitude of prejudiced assumptions and stereotypes just hurts everyone.


    I didn't design the rainbow flag. I would've made a different design, something that specifically represents gays.

    Well anyway that wasn't my point. I don't necessarily believe that bisexuals have commitment issues per se. My point is they can't commit to a specific gender. If they date or marry someone, they start craving the other gender. This is absolutely true. It always happens. You don't believe how many times I've seen "bi married dudes" going online, going to bathhouses, bars, clubs to hook up with men. It's ridiculous. Then there are total assholes, like my ex boyfriend, who say things like they kinda want to go back on the other team while they're dating you.

    I feel so bad that gay men have to open themselves to bisexuals because there aren't enough fish in the sea. And it's so ridiculous how you bisexuals think you are so desirable. Oh please. All the straight women specifically say NO to you.
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    Feb 02, 2015 11:49 PM GMT
    I am sorry you were hurt by a thoughtless person. But jerks come in all colors too.
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    Feb 03, 2015 5:51 AM GMT
    Back to the OP, dating bisexuals is complicated. They tend to have this "I wouldn't date a black guy but I would date a black woman" or "I wouldn't date an Asian guy but I'd date an Asian girl." They're just as tangent as my posts and difficult to live with.
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    Feb 04, 2015 3:16 AM GMT
    i can see why fem guys tend to like bi and 'str8' guys but the love doesn't seem to typically be returned. i'd say most gay/bi/'str8'/questioning guys all prefer the masc meat.
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    Feb 04, 2015 5:17 AM GMT
    I haven't encountered any in a long time, but there used to be a sort of severely twisted closeted guy - and there were a lot of them posting ads and such 20 years ago - that wanted to have sex with another guy but only if the guy were dressed up as a girl. I'm not sure if it really had anything to do with attraction as much as their own self-hatred. Never met any of them in person, so I can only wonder.
  • BloodFlame

    Posts: 1860

    Apr 26, 2015 9:48 AM GMT
    I didn't know this thread was still going at the time but thanks for the extra answers. I really wanted to believe there was some fallback for feminine gay guys in terms of dating our opposites.

    Wesy It just seems like bisexual men are truly the only ones who would seem interested in being with a feminine guy. Even if it's short-lived and they will go back to a woman, at least fem guys like me would have finally had the experience to be with someone we really liked. Nothing lasts forever anyway.

    It's come to a point where I'd entertain getting with a married guy and being the "secret." I always objected to such a notion but as time goes by and you realize just how limited you are, I now understand why feminine men are more prone to being the "side ho" or staying in emotional/physically abusive relationships for the stark reality that they feel they'll never meet another guy.
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    May 02, 2015 11:33 PM GMT
    Short answer: Craigslist
  • BloodFlame

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    May 05, 2015 6:29 PM GMT
    2452North saidShort answer: Craigslist


    What about it?
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    May 10, 2015 5:28 AM GMT
    So most of my friends classify me as being 'masculine.' And I don't care how a guy talks or walks - as long as we have things in common. So if a guy only listens to Britney Spears and chats endlessly about the latest episode of Fashion Police, then it's just not going to work -- even if he looks and acts like the toughest dude in town. My ex was obviously gay, but he was deeply interested in science and had tons of interesting stories to tell, and he always made me laugh. That was sexy.